Tester by HJ Macey (nonfiction book recommendations .TXT) 📖

as he saw me approaching it.

 

 "Arr Mr Lacey you wasted no time, can I offer you coffee we have nothing stronger up here," he said, holding out his hand in greeting.

 

 "I have had a request, to find someone aboard this ship that has twice saved a damsel in distress. The description given matched only you, if you are free tonight I would like to invite you, to dine with me at my table in first-class dining?"

 

 "I would love to captain, but my dress suit is away at the cleaners. I still have my mess kit, but as I am no longer in the Navy, so I cannot wear that. So you see I will have to decline your kind invitation, no matter how much it pains me." I answered trying to stop from smiling too much and saw he was smiling a cheeky smile.

 

 "We thought of that didn't we Mr Tankard, try this on Mr Lacey we have a tailor onboard, a tuck here and a tuck there, dinner is at seven Mr Lacey." I left the bridge shaking my head, the old sea-dog had outmanoeuvred me. I had a dress shirt and trousers that needed ironing and a bow tie from my mess kit. It was my mess dress jacket I couldn't wear, it still had navy badges and campaign medals. I was no longer able to wear, the medals ribbons maybe but not all the rest of the gold brad. Outside the dining-room door, I was met by a steward with the white dinner jacket.

 

 "Mr Lacey may I introduce you to the honourable Lord James Keats, the new ambassador to Western Australia, and his wife the lady Pamela Keats, and this is their daughter Annabelle." His lordship thrust out his hand, his wife bowed her head and Annabelle curtseyed.

 

 "Pleased to meet you, sir, ladies," I said shaking his hand and nodding to the two women.

 

 "I owe you a diet of gratitude sir, you saved my daughter from the swimming pool." His lordship said, I smiled and looked at the girl, who was looking shy.

 

 "She wasn't in mortal danger; sir, anyone could have pulled her from the pool. I was just lucky enough to see it happening, and was the first to react that's all." Then a few eyebrows were raised, when I was asked what I wanted to drink.

 

 "Fruit cocktail if you please," was my answer, and I toasted the health of all there with it, as I sat at the long table, with the rest of the captain's guests. After the meal, they stood or sat around in groups, chatting and politely laughing at each other's jokes. As I was talking to the engineering officer, I spied Annabelle heading my way so I excused myself from the officer and turned to greet her.

 

 "Please, it's Anna." She said after I had welcomed her, as Miss Keats.

 

 "I must thank you myself, for your help in the market the other day. I would have paid him five pounds for that box, he didn't look too happy with you. I was very surprised, to get it for the one pound." I smiled and looked around as if to see if anyone was listening and said.

 

 "So was I, I expected to pay three maybe four as he started with eight, so he expected to get four. They always ask high and you bid low, then you barter your way to an agreement." I told her smiling face and then interrupted by a largish woman.

 

 "Did you join us at Port Said, I can't remember seeing you before?" she asked, taking a sip of her cocktail.

 

 "Oh, Mr Lacey has been on board, since Southampton Mrs Barrington. He's the Captains guest tonight, at the request of my father, he's emigrating to Australia, isn't that right Mr Lacey." A smiling Annabelle said to the startled Mrs Barrington, before turning to me.

 

 "Please Anna call me Joe, I'm pleased to meet you, Mrs Barrington," I said extending my hand, to the woman who was rapidly flushing red and refused my hand saying.

 

 "You're not in first class, oh my," she said and turned away and quickly joined another group. She must have told them, she had just met someone from another race because they all looked our way and looked at us down their noses.

 

 "Snobs, I hate that," said Anna, turning back to me.

 

 "I've seen you jogging around the ship, in that Team Navy tracksuit, you had on when you rescued me from the pool. I thought you were one of the crew, and went to the Captain, after port Side to ask if I could thank you. When I asked the captain and told him what you looked like, he said he knew who you were, but said you were not part of his crew and that you are emigrating. He also told me you used to be in the Navy, and that explains the tracksuit," Anna said happily smiling at me as if she had uncovered some deep dark secret.

 

 "My you have been a busy bee, but there's no need to thank me I was happy to help, have you been to Australia before Anna?" I asked just as her father, came strolling towards us.

 

 "No I haven't nor has my dad, but he's been waiting for this posting for years. He has been in the diplomatic serves, for twenty years and has always wanted this job. I was born in India when he was out there, but we haven't stayed anywhere for too long. This posting is for five years, and maybe longer if he wants'. Have you been to Australia before Joe, I suppose you've been all over the world?" Anna said happily smiling at me, trying to make conversation.

 

 "Yes, I've been there twice, once for seven days on an aircraft carrier. The second time for two months, that was last year about this time," I told her just as her father joined in with the conversation.

 

 "Is my daughter monopolising you Mr Lacey, I hope she isn't boring you," he said smiling at Anna.

 

 "Not at all Sir she has been pleasant company, in fact, nobody seems to want to talk to me," I said looking around.

 

 "I'm afraid that's Mrs Barrington, she has told everybody your an immigrant from steerage. There are some who still think because they have money they are better than others," I smiled and looking at him said.

 

 "If Mrs Barrington is going to live in Australia, she is going to find it a strange place. I've met many people in fairly high places in Australia that talk, without smelling salts up their nose," Anna laughed, and his lordship smiled.

 

 "Haven't heard that one before, but it does some up people with their noses in the air, when were you in Australia last Mr Lacey, I think I heard you say you were there for two months."

 

 "That's right sir, and please do call me Joe, I was there this time last year. There was a commonwealth boxing tournament, and I was part of it," I said; but didn't want to add more, and Anna didn't ask the question.

 

 "You had just come back from Kuwait dad, which was the beginning of October." My ears pricked up, as soon as she mentioned Kuwait.

 

 "Kuwait you were out there last year, did you know an Anwar Ben Hamdan out there?" I asked as I thought of Alice's Arab friend, and if he was what Alice thought he was.

 

"That's Bin Hamdan Joe, Prince Anwar Bin Hamdan; he's the trade minister for Kuwait, the younger brother of the Emir of Kuwait. He is next in line to rule, a very powerful man and he is very pro British, he went to Eton and Sandhurst. How do you know of him, Joe, he's not easy to get close too." God, I know someone that gets very close to him, I thought, hell does Alice know he's a Prince.

 

 "My brother in law is a part of a grope that deals in exports with him that's all," I answered and felt I was spying on Alice, by finding out his identity.

 

 "The captain told me about the Jacket, Joe, still a bit big at the waist but the tailor did a fair job, seeing how round our Mr Tankard is." His lordship said nodding towards the man in question, in a much larger dinner jacket than he gave me, he had obviously grown out of this one. I didn't think he would want it back, though I did offer it to him when I said goodnight to the captain.

 

Chapter 26b

 

We were heading south to the Equator, and it got hotter as we approached it, people were sunbathing and the swimming pool was the place to be and to be seen. I had just come out of the gym, in my tracksuit and was passing the pool, when I heard Anna call my name, she was in a trendy one-piece swimsuit with a little skirt, that looked very nice on her, and she was waving at me.

 

 "You really should cool off Joe, you must be boiling in that tracksuit, you shouldn't worry what people think, we're not all perfect." She was right I should come out of hiding, and dress for the weather and not for modesty. Unzipping my top and pulling off my trainers and tracksuit bottoms. Off came my tank top, and the crowd parted and looked at me, as I went to the poolside shower, to wash off my sweat. Then I turned to see an opened mouthed Anna staring at me, as I walked back towards her, I did the pose and the dancing muscle routine, making her giggle and hide her big smile behind her hands.

 

 After the Gulf of Aden, we headed almost due east, south of Ceylon and into the Malacca Strait then down to Singapore. My first stop was Mr Wang's tailor shop; before I left home, I had sent him a request for two dinner jackets. One white one black, that Alice had designed before she had fallen out with me. The white one had black lapels, and black pocket tops, they were both made from a velvet material. Which had a textured embossed pattern, and was tailored to fit me like a glove. Mr Wang wanted an hour, to do some minor adjustments; he could have more than that, as I was going to the garrison from here.

 

 "Arrest that man, he's out of uniform," I heard as I approached the gate, and tiny Singleton came from the gatehouse shaking his bonker stick at me. He hadn't actually bonked anyone on the head with it, but he always had it with him, just in case he had to. The highly polished wooden club was made from the jarrah tree and was a traditional Maori war club call a Pelu, and had been handed down from his ancestors.

 

While I was stationed here, he had been Master at arms, and we had become good friends. Tiny was six foot six, and two foot at the shoulders, a gentler giant you couldn't find, and he had a hug like a bear.

 

 "Heard you were out you daft bugger, now I've got all these lovely wrens all to myself," he said lifting me off my feet, and turning around.

 

 "Come to see the skipper Joe, he's up in his office thinking of promoting me to the guardian of wrens virtues, and the key holder of their chastity belts." He said wistfully looking skyward, hoping for a Wren to fall into his arms.

 

 "Don't you ever stop thinking of somewhere, to put that dick of yours?" I asked as he put me down.

 

 "Nope," came his answer, as he appointed a rating to escort me into the garrison, and up to Captain Foster's office. Where the Capitan's wren secretary Doris opened his door and announced me. He was already coming from behind his desk, smiling and holding out his hand in welcome.

 

 "Tiny just told me you were here, good to see you, Joseph, you're looking well, I'm