Mr. Midshipman Easy by Frederick Marryat (reading tree .TXT) 📖
- Author: Frederick Marryat
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“Oh! you grant that to be very natural. Well, Mr Easy, I am glad to perceive that we are of one mind, and I trust we shall continue so. You’ll observe that I and my keepers being three, we are the strong party in this instance, and admitting your argument, that the fish are as much yours as mine, still I take advantage of my strength to repossess myself of them, which is, as you say, very natural-James, take those fish.”
“If you please,” interrupted Jack, “we will argue that point-”
“Not at all; I will act according to your own arguments-I have the fish, but I now mean to have more-that fishing-rod is as much mine as yours, and being the stronger party I will take possession of it. James, William, take that fishing-rod,-it is ours.”
“I presume you will first allow me to observe,” replied Jack, “that although I have expressed my opinion that the earth and the animals on it were made for us all, that I never yet have asserted, that what a man creates by himself, or has created for him for a consideration, is not his own property.”
“I beg your pardon; the trees that that rod was made from were made for us all, and if you, or any one for you, have thought proper to make it into a rod, it is no more my fault than it is that I have been feeding the fish, with the supposition that they were my own. Everything being common, and it being but natural that the strong should take advantage of the weak, I must take that rod as my property, until I am dispossessed by one more powerful. Moreover, being the stronger party, and having possession of this land, which you say does not belong to me more than to you-I also shall direct my keepers to see you off this property. James, take the rod-see Mr Easy over the park palings. Mr Easy, I wish you a good morning.”
“Sir, I beg your pardon, you have not yet heard all my arguments,” replied Jack, who did not approve of the conclusions drawn.
“I have no time to hear more, Mr Easy; I wish you a good morning.” And the proprietor departed, leaving Jack in company with the keepers.
“I’ll trouble you for that rod, master,” said William. James was very busy stringing the fish through the gills upon a piece of osier.
“At all events you will hear reason, ” said Jack: “I have arguments-” “I never heard no good arguments in favour of poaching,” interrupted the keeper.
“You’re an insolent fellow,” replied Jack. “It is by paying such vagabonds as you that people are able to be guilty of injustice.
“It’s by paying us that the land an’t poached-and if there be some excuse for a poor devil who is out of work, there be none for you, who call yourself a gentleman.”
“According to his account, as we be all equal, he be no more a gentleman than we be.”
“Silence, you blackguard, I shall not condescend to argue with such as you: if I did, I could prove that you are a set of base slaves, who have just as much right to this property as your master or I have.”
“As you have, I dare say, master.”
“As I have, you scoundrel; this pond is as much my property, and so are the fish in it, as they are of your master, who has usurped the right.”
“I say, James, what do you say, shall we put the young gentleman in possession of his property?” said William, winking to the other.
James took the hint, they seized Jack by the arms and legs, and soused him into the pond. Jack arose after a deep submersion, and floundered on shore blowing and spluttering. But in the meantime the keepers had walked away, carrying with them the rod and line, fish, and tin can of bait, laughing loudly at the practical joke which they had played our hero.
“Well,” thought Jack, “either there must be some mistake in my father’s philosophy, or else this is a very wicked world. I shall submit this case to my father.”
And Jack received this reply-“I have told you before, Jack, that these important truths will not at present be admitted-but it does not the less follow that they are true. This is the age of iron, in which might has become right-but the time will come when these truths will be admitted, and your father’s name will be more celebrated than that of any philosopher of ancient days. Recollect, Jack, that although in preaching against wrong and advocating the rights of man, you will be treated as a martyr, it is still your duty to persevere; and if you are dragged through all the horse-ponds in the kingdom, never give up your argument.”
“That I never will, sir,” replied Jack; “but the next time I argue it shall be, if possible, with power on my side, and, at all events, not quite so near a pond.”
“I think,” said Mrs Easy, who had been a silent listener, “that Jack had better fish in the river, and then, if he catches no fish, at all events he will not be soused in the water, and spoil his clothes.”
But Mrs Easy was no philosopher.
A few days afterwards, Jack discovered, one fine morning, on the other side of a hedge, a summer apple-tree bearing tempting fruit, and he immediately broke through the hedge, and climbing the tree, as our first mother did before him, he culled the fairest and did eat.
“I say, you sir, what are you doing there?” cried a rough voice.
Jack looked down, and perceived a stout, thickset personage in grey coat and red waistcoat, standing underneath him.
“Don’t you see what I’m about,” replied Jack, “I’m eating apples-shall I throw you down a few?”
“Thank you kindly-the fewer that are pulled the better; perhaps, as you are so free to give them to others as well as to help yourself, you may think that they are your own property!”
“Not a bit more my property than they are yours, my good man.”
“I guess that’s something like the truth; but you are, not quite at the truth yet, my lad; those apples are mine, and I’ll trouble you to come down as fast as you please; when you’re down we can then settle our accounts; and,” continued the man, shaking his cudgel, “depend upon it you shall have your receipt in full.”
Jack did not much like the appearance of things.
“My good man,” said he, “it is quite a prejudice on your part to imagine that apples were not given, as well as all other fruit, for the benefit of us all-they are common property, believe me.”
“That’s a matter of opinion, my lad, and I may be allowed to have own.
“You’ll find it in the Bible,” says Jack.
“I never did yet, and I’ve read it through and through all, bating the Pocryfar.”
“Then,” said Jack, “go home and fetch the Bible, and I’ll prove it to you.”
“I suspect you’ll not wait till I come back again. No, no; I have lost plenty of apples, and have long wanted to find the robbers out; now I’ve caught one I’ll take care that he don’t ‘scape without apple sauce, at all events-so come down, you young thief, come down directly-or it will be all the worse for you.”
“Thank you,” said Jack, “but I am very well here. I will, if you please, argue the point from where I am.”
“I’ve no time to argue the point, my lad; I’ve plenty to do, but do not think I’ll let you off. If you don’t choose to come down, why then you may stay there, and I’ll answer for it, as soon as work is done I shall find you safe enough.”
“What can be done,” thought Jack, “with a man who will not listen to argument? What a world is this!-however, he’ll not find me here when he comes back, I’ve a notion.”
But in this Jack was mistaken. The farmer walked to the hedge, and called to a boy, who took his orders and ran to the farmhouse. In a minute or two a large bull-dog was seen bounding along the orchard to his master. “Mark him, Caesar,” said the farmer to the dog, “mark him.” The dog crouched down on the grass with his head up, and eyes glaring at Jack, showing a range of teeth that drove all our hero’s philosophy out of his head.
“I can’t wait here, but Caesar can, and I will tell you, as a friend, that if he gets hold of you, he’ll not leave a limb of you together,- when work’s done I’ll come back”; so saying, the farmer walked off, leaving Jack and the dog to argue the point, if so inclined. What a sad jade must philosophy be, to put her votaries in such predicaments!
After a while the dog laid his head down and closed his eyes, as if asleep, but Jack observed that at the least movement on his part one eye was seen partially to unclose; so Jack, like a prudent man, resolved to remain where he was. He picked a few more apples, for it was his dinnertime, and as he chewed he ruminated.
Jack had been but a few minutes ruminating before he was interrupted by another ruminating animal, no less a personage than a bull, who had been turned out with full possession of the orchard, and who now advanced, bellowing occasionally, and tossing his head at the sight of Caesar, whom he considered as much a trespasser as his master had our hero. Caesar started on his legs and faced the bull, who advanced pawing, with his tail up in the air. When within a few yards the bull made a rush at the dog, who evaded him and attacked him in return, and thus did the warfare continue until the opponents were already at some distance from the apple-tree. Jack prepared for immediate flight, but unfortunately the combat was carried on by the side of the hedge at which Jack had gained admission. Never mind, thought Jack, there are two sides to every field and although the other hedge joined on to the garden near to the farmhouse, there was no option. “At all events,” said Jack, “I’ll try it.” Jack was slipping down the trunk, when he heard a tremendous roar; the bull-dog had been tossed by the bull; he was then high in the air, and Jack saw him fall on the other side of the hedge; and the bull was thus celebrating his victory with a flourish of trumpets. Upon which Jack, perceiving that he was relieved from his sentry, slipped down the rest of the tree and took to his heels. Unfortunately for Jack, the bull saw him, and, flushed with victory, he immediately set up another roar, and bounded after Jack. Jack perceived his danger, and fear gave him wings; he not only flew over the orchard, but he flew over the hedge, which was about five feet high, just as the bull drove his head into it. Look before you leap, is an old proverb. Had Jack done so, he would have done better; but as there were cogent reasons to be offered in extenuation of our philosopher, we shall say no more, but merely state that Jack, when he got to the other side of the hedge, found that he had pitched into a small apiary, and had upset two hives of bees who resented the intrusion; and Jack had hardly time to get upon his legs before he found them very busy stinging him in all quarters.
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