Firmament Dopamine by Joel (best ebook reader .TXT) 📖

experiences about relationships listening to my mother. I really did not mind my mother going out with guys because I felt that she deserved to be happy matter fact I felt everybody deserved a second chance and look for true love I mean, after all she looked very lonely and I know a son cant love u like a man I be alive every woman deserves to be touched at some point of time to feel aroused to feel that love is all nature. Eventually my mother met my stepfather and got married after 2 yars of dating my stepfather was a old school gangster that had the mentality ready for anything he taught me how to live the street life he gave me rules and hints conquering the streets. My mother and step dad moved and got a room next block from 138st aside was a diner and a mexican store called "latino" back then it was called "pequeno gigante". Yes, we moved into a room not an apartment but a room for the fact I think my mother had no money and we owed like three rents already so eventually we had to move and gave half of our stuff to people for the fact that we had to many and had no space to put them at. I remember I had to give away my favorite bike to my cousin Alexis while I was giving it to him I started tearing I did not really knew what was going on why were we being moving to a small room? why did we not pay the whole rent I mean my mother actually. I got along with my stepfather great he had told me it was my choice if I wanted to call him father or by his name and the he did not mind he just did not wanted me to feel obligated or disturbed or create some sort of rivalry. My stepfather was a cool guy not that mean or not to stupid he knew what he wanted when it came to decisions. He never wanted to talk about his affiliations with his past life in gangs all though there was very obvious evidence that will categorize him as a gang member like pictures throwing gangs signs,voice machine messages stating there was "problems" and his friends carried all the times pistols to every party they would attend to. He probably thought I would of not noticed but I did see all that and more like hidden knifes he would carry inside his jackets and alot of cellphones which I did not know where he would get them. He had very long hair and always had nice sneakers with different colors and had a lot of piercings on his left ear. I have no idea why mother fell in love with a "thug" but hey it was her life and her decision and I respected and loved my mother with all my heart. I remember once I was sent to the supermarket to get some milk and some kid wanted to rob me but I came running back to my house and did not know who to tell because it was my first time experiencing something like that except the time my father I got robbed in our building by two teenagers while having groceries in our hands at age 7 so, I told my stepfather I was going to get robbed by some kid at the supermarket and I remember he was sleeping and when I told him that he got up and took out the gun and told me to leave the milk in the kitchen fridge and going after him. So we did look for the kid but we never found him at the time that was something real cool for me something nice that somebody could of protected me and coming from a mother that had no experience whatsoever in anything in the field of violence I loved it. He was a real gangster a person a super hero a guy with the guts to come up to you and do whatever he wanted to. And he was my stepfather!
In school everything went by smooth I graduated from elementary and I attended I.S 162 in the Bronx close to Jackson ave I was placed in band class because I had an outstanding average on my report card. I decided to play the percussion for the fact that I loved how is sounded and of course it was very easy for me to play it. The majority of the kids at my old elementary were Mexican so coming to a school where there was a small population of Mexicans felt really weird I felt left out. Mostly all my old friends from elementary had gone to bad schools like Clark at 143st in the bronx and Burger Jr.located at 138st. At the beginning it was really fun i loved learning and being part of a band I mean playing a nice instrument and getting extra work so I can learn, most was great. At the time my mother was attending a beauty supply school at Fordham road in the corner of grand concourse at the Bronx. I mostly stood home and took care of my baby sister so we mostly did not get to spend time with our mother. My uncles wife use to take care of us at the time my mother would drop my sister off in the morning right before heading to school meanwhile I headed to eat breakfast at I.S 162. After school I would go see my baby sister at my uncles house and waited for my mother to pick us up she mostly would get there at 6:00pm so it was a a little sad from my point of view for the fact sometimes I would have problems in school and knowing the fact my mother was going through stress with exams and I did not want to become a bother. In school I would have good days and horrible days I remember while being a freshmen in junior high school I would get picked on randomly not a constant thing u can say but I was really small I looked real young and i was really shy I kept a diary I listened to classic rock like limp bizkit, kid rock I watched wrestling played pokemon I was a straight off virgin yup no sex yet had a few pair of jeans no expensive attire i would barely look people in the face and kept day dreaming. At band class I felt I did not belong there I had no idea being in band class required high grades I had no idea my school believed I was a smart ass I just thought it was like any other regular class. It was a cool class it was just tons of work my professor she was Jew she seemed very caring at the time my very first day off school i remember I was walking by the hall way and there was a bunch of other kids going to class meanwhile I was totally lost so she kept calling my name I think she knew freshmen kids would always get lost or something (laughing) so I came towards her and said it was me she asked me to sit and as I did went to my assigned desk put down my book bag and was ready for the day. Everything was going well lunch was real good I had no friends but later I began talking to everyone little by little the only problem with me it was I played alot and most the kids there were serious for some strange reason.
Imprint

Text: All rights reserved by Joel Flores 2011
Publication Date: 02-16-2011

All Rights Reserved

Dedication:
Dedicated to all the people that have been around through my tough and happy situations and of course all the people that keep showing love.