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been tamed at long last. And quietly taken its place alongside Classical, Jazz and Folk as just another facet of the massive music industry. But then is that not its final victory?

Book Five ā€“ Beachcombings from the Halling Valley Riverbank

Chapter One ā€“ Bouzingo and Other Versified Remnants

1. Bouzingo ā€“ The Gathering of the Poets

The boy was aged about eighteen,
Pale and pensive,
Weary and frail in appearance.
He could have been
Goetheā€™s Werther,
Senancour's Obermann
Or Chateaubriand's melancholy hero,
Embraced by a generation
And about whom Sainte Beuve said:
" RenĆ©, c'est moi.ā€
Tortured by a new mal du siĆØcle,
He sought refuge
In the Club Bouzingo.
Two young poets,
One dark, the other fair,
Drifted past. The first,
Whose black hair
Hung in ringlets over his shoulders,
Wore a small pointed beard,
Black velvet tails,
A white linen shirt
Loosely fastened at the neck
By a thin pink taffeta tie;
The second wore a tight coat
That opened onto a silk crimson waistcoat
And a lace jabot, white trousers
With blue seams,
And a wide-brimmed black hat, and
In one of his hands
He carried a long thin pink-coloured pipe.
They were soon joined
By some of their dandified companions.
The music had stopped playing, and
The poet-leader in cape and gloves,
Dark and pomaded
With a ThƩophile Gautier moustache,
Took to the stage,
Where he proceeded to declaim
Selections from his subversive verses
To delirious cheers,
As if sedition was imminent;
Only the boy-poet remained silent,
His pale cheeks
Soakā€™d by the freshest tears.
ā€œAprĆØs nous le dĆ©luge,ā€
He said under his breath,
ā€œOur leader preaches revolution
But provides no solution
As to the fate of coming generations,
Should the infant be cast out
With the bath water that is so filthy
In his sight
That, intent on doing right,
Gives no thought to the future,
Nor to what might supplant
The society he claims to despise.ā€
The boy was aged about eighteen
Pale and pensive
Weary and frail in appearance.
He could have been
Goetheā€™s Werther,
Senancour's Obermann
Or Chateaubriand's melancholy hero,
Embraced by a generation,
And about whom Sainte Beuve said:
"RenĆ©, c'est moi.ā€
Tortured by a new mal du siĆØcle,
He sought refuge
From the Club Bouzingo.

2. Oh My My My (Call the FBI)

Couldnā€™t bā€™lieve my peepers
When I first saw you
Couldnā€™t bā€™lieve the beauty
Of your baby blues
I knew I had to ask you if youā€™d
Like to dance
I knew I had to take heart and to
Take that chance

First you resisted me you said
You couldnā€™t leave
Your friends alone
But after our first dance you said
You thought they would be
Ok to find their own way home

Oh my my my
Call the FBI
I think I lost my pride
I think I found my bride

Couldnā€™t bā€™lieve Iā€™d ever
Find a girl like you
Couldnā€™t bā€™lieve weā€™d bond
As if by superglue
I knew I had such tender feelings
In my heart
I knew that I could fix it so weā€™d
Never part

First you resisted me you said
You werenā€™t ready
To fall in love
But after our first dance you said
You thought youā€™d give
This crazy swain another chance

Oh my my my
Call the FBI
I think I lost my pride
I think I found my bride

3. Some Romantic Afternoon

Some Romantic Afternoon
I will hear that haunting tune
The one that I would softly croon
By a lagoon

Weā€™d go sailing to Cadiz
For a while it seemed like bliss
Now it alls seems just a myth
Like Brigadoon

Took a boat to southern Spain
Just to see her face again
She had gone forever
Not to return there
I could not control the tears
How they burned my eyes
As I lookā€™d back at those lost years

Some Romantic Afternoon
I will hear that haunting tune
The one that I would softly croon
By a lagoon

4. For More than a Million Dreams

Keep on chipping
Right away at my heart
Because you touched it
Right from the start
If you were to leave me
And then
We were to part
It would really tear me apart

Donā€™t stop now,
Darling youā€™re getting to me
Donā€™t quit now
That youā€™re ahead
Donā€™t stop now
Youā€™ve made an impression on me
Now thereā€™s no getting you out of my head.

Keep on tearing
All my defences down
Because I feel that
Theyā€™re all going to fall
Keep on keeping up with
All of your charms
Because I feel
Iā€™m going to give you my all

Donā€™t stop now,
You lit such a fire in me
Donā€™t quit now
Because that would be cruel
Donā€™t stop now
Darling, donā€™t tire of me
Iā€™d feel such a fool and so confused

Youā€™re the one
I have longed for you
For more than a million dreams
Youā€™re the one
I have been strong for you
You donā€™t know how hard itā€™s been

Donā€™t stop now,
Darling youā€™re getting to me
Donā€™t quit now
That youā€™re ahead
Donā€™t stop now

5. Melancholy Girl

Melancholy Girl,
With your pre-Raphaelite curls
You don't seem quite of this world
Such a strange and a sad-eyed girl

What happened to your smile
How came you to be so full of guile
Your eyes seem to stare for miles
For such a sweet and a tender child

There's someone you've got to meet
The truth can set you free
Eternally
Enigmatic babe
The way you live is a shame
Life is more than a game
Freedom's found in just one name

I'd like to show you another way
Where the dark can't harm you
Night or day

Melancholy Girl,
With your pre-Raphaelite curls
You don't seem quite of this world
Such a strange and a sad-eyed girl

6. My Travels

My travels start
Right here
Deep in my mind
My travels take me just where
I please I donā€™t have
To leave my warm room

My travels start
Sixteen sun
Beating down
Sinatraā€™s crooning Jobim
And Iā€™m just dreaming of my
Great romance to come

I donā€™t need a little ticket
Tells me I can take the train
I donā€™t even to risk it
Thereā€™s no blistering sun
Or driving rain
And itā€™s here that I remain

My travels end
With a sweet
And peaceful time
Iā€™ve found such sense deep within
No more will I feel
The need to go travelling again.

7. Some Sun Drunk Day He Said

Emotions war against sense
And his mind remains
A pot pourri
And thoughts in his head
When he lies in his bed
Would make Dorian Gray
Appear pristine
He wishes to moralize
On a corrupt example
Yet from the wicked cup
He hath supped a sample.

He appears to think in extremes
He is beau-laid and realist
Whose inspiration stems from his dreams.
ā€œLife is a beautiful strain for meā€,
One sun-drunk day he said
But I pray I say what my soul needs to
Before the heavens decide me dead.
But his mind is a disorderly drawer
Full of confused categorizations
He has that Scott Fitzgerald illness
For dates, times, rhymes and quotations.
ā€œI have a clear flowing mind
but I cannot foretell
When the clogging black clouds will arrive
For they will arrive
Live with the love, then bear the pain
Recurrent like the monsoon rain.

He is afraid of happiness
For the inevitable despair that must follow it
Afraid of happiness
For its cruel impermanence
Like Zola, the seasons in life, for him
Are inevitable.
ā€œAll artists,ā€ he says, ā€œare at once alike and unique
One day, itā€™s clear,
The next, hazy, like a beery vision
The fulfilment that they seek.
Misty dreams of sweet-smelling roses
And swaying streams
Bring him chills and pains in his soul and being.
He lives his life through a melancholy tragedy
And has an ever-yearning mind.

8. Gallant Festivities

It was my evening, thatā€™s
For sure
ā€œItā€™s your auraā€¦ā€
For sure -
At last Iā€™m good
At something
ā€œSpot the Equity cardā€¦ā€
ā€œWhen are you going
To be a superstar?ā€
Said Sara
That seemed to be
The question
On everyoneā€™s lips.
At last, at last, at last
Iā€™m good at somethingā€¦


And so the partyā€¦Zoe
called me...I listenedā€¦
ā€¦To her problemsā€¦
References
To my ā€œinnocent faceā€ā€¦
Linda said:
ā€œSally seems Elusive
But is in fact,
Accessible;
Youā€™re the opposite -
You give to everyone
But are incapable
Of giving in particular.ā€

Madeleine was comparing me
To June Millerā€¦
Descriptions by Nin:
ā€œShe does not dare
To be herselfā€¦ā€
Everything Iā€™d always
Wanted to be, I now amā€¦
ā€œā€¦She lives
On the reflections
Of herself in the eyes
Of others...
There is no June
To grasp and knowā€¦ā€

I kept getting up to danceā€¦
Sally said: ā€œIā€™m afraidā€¦
Youā€™re inscrutable
Youā€™re not just
BlasƩ,
Are you?ā€
I spoke
Of the spells of calm
And the hysterical
Reactions
Psychic Exhaustion
Then anxious elationā€¦

9. The Wanderer of Golders Green

I awake each morning
With fresh hope
And tranquility
I might go for a saunter
Down quiet London backstreets
Soon my aimlessness
Depresses me,
And I realise
I'd been deceiving myself
As to my ability
To relax as others do.

I decided on a Special B
Before the eve.
I bought a lager
At the Bar
And chatted to Gaye.
Then Ray
Bought me another.
I appreciated the fact
That he remembered
The time he,
His gal Chris,
And Rory Downed
An entire Bottle
Of Jack Daniels
In a Paris-bound train.

A tanned cat
Bought me a (large) half,
Then another half.
My fatal eyes
Are my downfall.
I drank yet another half...

My head was spinning
When it hit the pillow
I awoke
With a terrible headache
Around one o'clock.
I prayed it would depart.

I slowly got dressed.
I was as chatty as ever
Before the exam...
French/English translation.
Periodically I put my face
In my hands or groaned
Or sighed -
My stomach
was burning me inside.

I finished my paper
In 1 hour and a half.
As I walked out
I caught various eyes
Amandaā€™s, Trudyā€™s (quizzical) etcā€¦
I went to bedā€¦
Slept ā€˜till fiveā€¦
Read Oā€™Neill until 7ish...
Got dressed
And strolled down
To Golders Green,
In order to relive
A few memories.
I sang to myself -
A few memories
Flashed into my mind,
But not as many
as I'd have liked -
It wasn't the same.
It wasn't the same.

Singing songs brought
Voluptuous tears.
I snuck into McDonalds
Where I felt At home,
Anonymous, alone.
I bought a few things,
Toothpaste and pick,
Chocolate, yoghurts,
Sweets, cigarettes
And fruit juice.

Took a sentimental journey
Back to Powis Gardens,
Richness
And intensity,
Romantic
And attractiveā€¦
Sad, suspicious and strange.
I sat up until 3am,
Reading Oā€™Neill
Or writing (inept) poetry.
Awoke at 10,
But didnā€™t leave
My room till 12,
Lost my way
To Swiss Cottage,
Lost my happiness.
Oh so conscious
Of my failure
And after a fashion,
Enjoying this knowledge.

Chapter Two - So That it Remain Perpetually Inchoate

Being a
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