A KNIGHT OF THE NINETEENTH CENTURY by Edward Payson Roe (world of reading .txt) 📖

Figure

Before Him, But, Supposing The Man Had Been Drinking, He Said

Impatiently:

 

 

 

"Please State Your Business Briefly, As My Time Is Valuable."

 

 

 

"If Yer Time Is Worth Mor'N News, I'Ll Go To Another Shop," Said Pat

Stiffly, Making a Feint Of Departure.

 

 

 

"That'S A Good Fellow, Go Along," Chimed in the Editor, Bending Down To

His Writing again.

 

 

 

Such Disastrous Acquiescence Puzzled pat For A Moment, And He Growled,

"No Wonder Yer Prints A Paper That'S Loike A Lump O' Lead, When 'Stead

O' Lookin' For News Yer Turns It Away From Yer Doors."

 

 

 

"Now, Look Here, My Man," Said The Editor Rising, "If You Have Anything

To Say, Say It. If You Have Been Drinking, You Will Not Be Permitted to

Make A Row In this Office."

 

 

 

"It'S Not Me, But Another Man That'S Been Dhrinkin'."

 

 

 

"Well," Snarled the Editor, "If The Other Man Had The Drink, You Have

The 'Drunk,' And If You Don'T Take Yourself Off, I'Ll Call Some Men From

The Press-Room Who May Put You Downstairs Uncomfortably Fast."

 

 

 

"Hould On A Bit," Remonstrated pat, "Before Yer Ruffle Yer Feathers

Clane Over Yer Head And Blinds Yer Eyes. Wud A Man Loike Boss Arnot Send

Me, If I Was Dhrunk, Wid A Letther At This Toime O' Night? And Wud He

Send A Letther To The Superintindent O' The Perlice At This Toime O' The

Night To Ax Him The Toime O' Day! Afore Yer Calls Yer Spalpeens Out O'

The Press-Room Squint At That."

 

 

 

The Moment The Editor Caught Sight Of The Business Stamp On Mr. Arnot'S

Letter And The Formal Handwriting, His Manner Changed, And He Said

Suavely:

 

 

 

"I Beg Your Pardon--We Have Misunderstood One Another--Take A Chair."

 

 

 

"There'S Been No Misunderstandin' On My Part," Retorted pat, With An

Injured air; "I'Ve Got As Dainty A Bit O' Scandal Jist Under Me Tongue

As Iver Ye Spiced yer Paper Wid, And Yees Thrates Me As If I Was The

Inimy O' Yer Sowl."

 

 

 

"Well, You See," Said The Editor Apologetically, "Your Not Being In our

Regular Employ, Mr.--I Beg Your Pardon--And Your Coming In this Unusual

Way And Hour--"

 

 

 

"But, Begorry, Somethin' Unusual'S Happened."

 

 

 

"So I Understand; It Was Very Good Of You To Come To Us First; Just Give

Me The Points, And I Will Jot Them Down."

 

 

 

"But What Are Yees Goin' To Give Me For The Pints?"

 

 

 

"That Depends Upon What They Are Worth. News Cannot Be Paid For Till We

Learn Its Value."

 

 

 

"Och! Here I'M Rinnin' A Grate Risk In tellin' Ye At All, And Whin I'Ve

Spilt It All Out, And Can'T Pick It Up Agin, Ye May Show Me The Door,

And Tell Me To Go 'Long Wid Me Rubbish."

 

 

 

"If You Find What You Have To Report In the Paper, You May Know It Is

Worth Something. So If You Will Look At The Paper To-Morrow You Can See

Whether It Will Be Worth Your While To Call Again," Said The Editor,

Becoming Impatient At Pat'S Hesitancy To Open His Budget.

 

 

 

"But I'M In sore Need of A Dollar Or Two To-Night. Dade, It'S As Much As

My Loife'S Worth To Go Home Widout 'Em."

 

 

 

"See Here, My Good Friend," Said The Editor, Rising again And Speaking

Very Energetically, "My Time Is Very Valuable, And You Have Taken

Considerable Of It. Whatever May Be The Nature Of Your News, It Will Not

Be Worth Anything To Me If You Do Not Tell It At Once."

 

 

 

"Well, You See The Biggest Part O' The News Is Goin' To Happen

To-Morrow."

 

 

 

"Well, Well, What Has Happened to-Night?"

 

 

 

"Will Ye Promise Not To Mention Me Name?"

 

 

 

"How Can I Mention It When I Don'T Know It?"

 

 

 

"That'S Thrue, That'S Thrue. Now Me Mind'S Aisy On That Pint, For Ye

Must Know That Boss Arnot'S In'Ards Are Made O' Cast-Iron, And He'D Have

No Marcy On A Feller. You'Ll Surely Give Me A Dollar, At Laste."

 

 

 

"Yes, If Your Story Is Worth Printing, And I Give You Just Three Minutes

In Which To Tell It."

 

 

 

Thus Pinned down, Pat Related all He Knew And Surmised concerning

Haldane'S Woful Predicament, Saying In conclusion:

 

 

 

"Ye Must Know That This Haldane Is Not A Poor Spalpeen Uv A Clerk, But A

Gintleman'S Son. They Sez That His Folks Is As Stylish And Rich As The

Arnots Themselves. If Ye'Ll Have A Reporther Up At The Office In the

Mornin', Ye'Ll Git The Balance O' The Tale."

 

 

 

Having Received his Dollar, Pat Went Chuckling On His Way To Deliver His

Employer'S Letter To The Superintendent Of The City Police.

 

 

 

"Faix! I Was As Wise As A Sarpent In not Tellin' Me Name, For Ye Niver

Can Thrust These Iditors. It'S No Green Irishman That Can Make A Dollar

After Twelve O' The Night."

 

 

 

A Sleepy Reporter Was Aroused and Despatched after Pat, In order To

Learn, If Possible, The Contents Of Mr. Arnot'S Note.

 

 

 

In The Meantime Heavily Leaded lines--Vague And Mysterious--Concerning

"Crime In high Life," Were Set Up, Accompanied on The Editorial Page By

A Paragraph To The Following Effect:

 

 

 

 

"With Our Usual Enterprise And Keen Scent For News, We Discovered at A

Late Hour Last Night That An Intelligent Irishman In the Employ Of Mr.

Arnot Had Been Intrusted by That Gentleman With A Letter Written After

The Hour Of Midnight To The Superintendent Of The Police. The Guilty

Party Appears To Be A Mr. Haldane--A Young Man Of Aristocratic And

Wealthy Connections--Who Is At Present In mr. Arnot'S Employ, And A

Member Of His Family. We Think We Are Aware Of The Nature Of His Grave

Offence, But In justice To All Concerned we Refer Our Readers To Our

Next Issue, Wherein They Will Find Full Particulars Of The Painful

Affair, Since We Have Obtained peculiar Facilities For Learning Them. No

Arrests Have Yet Been Made."

 

 

 

 

"That Will Pique All The Gossips In town, And Nearly Double Our Next

Issue," Complacently Muttered the Local Editor, As He Carried the Scrawl

At The Last Moment Into The Composing-Room.

 

 

 

In The Meantime The Hero Of Our Story--If Such A Term By Any Latitude Of

Meaning Can Be Applied to One Whose Folly Had Brought Him Into Such A

Prosaic And Miserable Plight--Still Lay In a Heavy Stupor On The Lounge

Where Pat Had Thrown His Form, That Had Been As Limp And Helpless As If

It Had Become A Mere Body Without A Soul. But The Consequences Of His

Action Did Not Cease With His Paralysis, Any More Than Do The Influences

Of Evil Deeds Perish With A Dying Man.

Chapter X (Returning Consciousness)

Mr. Arnot Did Not Leave His Library That Night. His Wife Came To The

Door And Found It Locked. To Her Appeal He Replied coldly, But

Decisively, That He Was Engaged.

 

 

 

She Sighed deeply, Feeling That The Sojourn Of Young Haldane Under Her

Roof Was Destined to End In a Manner Most Painful To Herself And To Her

Friend, His Mother. She Feared that The Latter Would Blame Her Somewhat

For His Miserable Fiasco, And She Fully Believed that If Her Husband

Permitted the Young Man To Suffer Open Disgrace, She Would Never Be

Forgiven By The Proud And Aristocratic Lady.

 

 

 

And Yet She Felt That It Was Almost Useless To Speak To Her Husband In

His Present Mood, Or To Hope That He Could Be Induced to Show Much

Consideration For So Grave An Offense.

 

 

 

Of The Worst Feature In haldane'S Conduct, However, She Had No

Knowledge. Mr. Arnot Rarely Spoke To His Wife Concerning His Business,

And She Had Merely Learned, The Previous Evening, That Haldane Had Been

Sent To New York Upon Some Errand. Acting Upon The Supposition That Her

Husband Had Remembered and Complied with Her Request, She Graciously

Thanked him For Giving The Young Man A Little Change And Diverting

Novelty Of Scene.

 

 

 

Mr. Arnot, Who Happened to Verge Somewhat Toward A Complacent Mood Upon

This Occasion, Smiled grimly At His Wife'S Commendation, And Even Unbent

So Far As To Indulge In some Ponderous Attempts At Wit With Laura

Concerning Her "Magnificent Offer," And Asserted that If She Had Been

"Like His Wife, She Would Have Jumped at The Chance Of Getting Hold Of

Such A Crude, Unreformed specimen Of Humanity. Indeed," Concluded he, "I

Did Not Know But That Mrs. Arnot Was Bringing about The Match, So That

She Might Have A Little Of The Raw Material For Reformatory Purposes

Continually On Hand."

 

 

 

Mrs. Arnot Smiled, As She Ever Did, At Her Husband'S Attempted

Witticisms; But What He Regarded as Light, Delicate Shafts, Winged

Sportively And Carelessly, Had Rather The Character Of Any Heavy Object

That Came To Hand Thrown At Her With Heedless, Inconsiderate Force. It

Is Due Mr. Arnot To Say That He Gave So Little Thought And Attention To

The Wounds And Bruises He Caused, As To Be Unaware That Any Had Been

Made. He Had No Hair-Springs And Jewel-Tipped machinery In his Massive,

Angular Organization, And He Acted practically As If The Rest Of

Humanity Had Been Cast In the Same Mold With Himself.

 

 

 

But Haldane'S Act Touched him At His Most Vulnerable Point. Not Only Had

A Large Sum Of His Money Been Made Away With, But, What Was Far Worse,

There Had Been A Most Serious Irregularity In the Business Routine.

While, Therefore, He Resolved that Haldane Should Receive Full

Punishment, The Ulterior Thought Of Giving The Rest Of His Employes A

Warning and Intimidating Lesson Chiefly Occupied his Mind.

 

 

 

Aware Of His Wife'S "Unbusinesslike Weakness And Sentimental Notions,"

As He Characterized her Traits, He Determined not To See Her Until He

Had Carried out His Plan Of Securing Repayment Of The Money, And Of

Striking a Salutary Sentiment Of Fear Into The Hearts Of All Who Were

Engaged in carrying Out His Methodical Will.

 

 

 

Therefore, With The Key Of Haldane'S Room In his Pocket, He Kept Watch

And Guard During The Remainder Of The Night, Taking Only Such Rest As

Could Be Obtained on The Lounge In his Library.

 

 

 

At About Sunrise Two Men Appeared, And Rapped lightly On The Library

Window. Mr. Arnot Immediately Went Out To Them, And Placed one Within A

Summer-House In the Spacious Garden At The Rear Of The House, And The

Other In front, Where He Would Be Partially Concealed by Evergreens. By

This Arrangement The Windows Of Haldane'S Apartment And Every Entrance

Of The House Were Under The Surveillance Of Police Officers In citizen'S

Dress. Mr. Arnot'S Own Personal Pride, As Well As Some Regard For His

Wife'S Feelings, Led him To Arrange That The Arrest Should Not Be Made

At Their Residence, For He Wished that All The Events Occurring at The

House Should Be Excluded as Far As Possible From The Inevitable Talk

Which The Affair Would Occasion. At The Same Time He Proposed to Guard

Against The Possibility Of Haldane'S Escape, Should Fear Or Shame Prompt

His Flight.

 

 

 

Having Now Two Assistant Watchers, He Threw Himself On The Sofa, And

Took An Hour Or More Of Unbroken Sleep. On Awaking, He Went With Silent

Tread To The Door Of Haldane'S Room, And, Afer Listening a Moment, Was

Satisfied from The Heavy Breathing Within That Its Occupant Was Still

Under The Influence Of Stupor. He Now Returned the Key To The Door, And

Unlocked it So That Haldane Could Pass Out As Soon As He Was Able. Then,

After Taking a Little Refreshment In the Dining-Room, He Went Directly

To The Residence Of A Police Justice Of His Acquaintance, Who, On

Hearing The Facts As Far As Then Known Concerning Haldane, Made Out A

Warrant For His Arrest, And Promised that The Officer To Whom It Would

Be Given Should Be Sent Forthwith To Mr. Arnot'S Office--For Thither The

Young Man Would First Come, Or Be Brought, On Recovering From His Heavy

Sleep.

 

 

 

Believing That He Had Now Made All The Arrangements Necessary To Secure

Himself From Loss, And To Impress The Small Army In his Service That

Honesty Was The "Best Policy" In their Relations With Him, Mr. Arnot

Walked leisurely To One Of His Factories In the Suburbs, Partly To See

That All Was Right, And Partly To Remind His Agents There That They Were

In The Employ Of One Whose Untiring Vigilance Would Not Permit Any

Neglect Of Duty To Escape Undetected.

 

 

 

Having Noted