A King, and No King by Francis Beaumont & John Fletcher (read me like a book TXT) 📖

do that you do not use to do; tell truth, or by my hand, I'le beat your Captains brains out, wash'em, and put 'em in again, that will I.

Bes.

There was a Lady Sir, I must confess, once in my charge: the Prince Tigranes gave her to my guard for her safety, how I us'd her, she may her self report, she's with the Prince now: I did but wait upon her like a groom, which she will testife I am sure: if not, my brains are at your service when you please Sir, and glad I have 'em for you.

Lyg.

This is most likely, Sir, I ask you pardon, and am sorry I was so intemperate.

Bes.

Well I can ask no more, you will think it strange not to have me beat you at first sight.

Lyg.

Indeed I would, but I know your goodness can forget twenty beatings, you must forgive me.

Bes.

Yes there's my hand, go where you will, I shall think you a valiant fellow for all this.

Lyg.

My da[u]ghter is a Whore, I feel it now too sensible; yet I will see her, discharge my self from being father to her, and then back to my Country, and there die, farwell Captain.

[Exit Lygo.

Bes.

Farwell Sir, farwell, commend me to the gentlewoman I pray.

1 Sword.

How now Captain? bear up man.

Bes.

Gentlemen o'th'sword, your hands once more; I have been kickt agen, but the foolish fellow is penitent, has askt me Mercy, and my honour's safe.

2 Sword.

We knew that, or the foolish fellow had better have kickt his grandsir.

Bes.

Confirm, confirm I pray.

1 Sword.

There be our hands agen, now let him come and say he was not sorry, and he sleeps for it.

Bes.

Alas good ignorant old man, let him go, let him go, these courses will undo him.

[Exeunt clear.

Enter Lygones And Bacurius.

Bac.

My Lord, your authority is good, and I am glad it is so, for my consent would never hinder you from seeing your own King, I am a Minister, but not a governor of this State, yonder is your King, I'le leave you.

[Exit.

Enter Tigranes And Spaconia.

Lyg.

There he is indeed, and with him my disloyal child.

Tigr.

I do perceive my fault so much, that yet me thinks thou shouldst not have forgiven me.

Lyg.

Health to your Majesty.

Tigr.

What? good Lygones welcome, what business brought thee hither?

Lyg.

Several businesses. My publick businesses will appear by this, I have a message to deliver, which if it please you so to authorize, is an embassage from the Armenian State, unto Arbaces for your liberty: the offer's there set down, please you to read it.

Tigr.

There is no alteration happened since I came thence?

Lyg.

None Sir, all is as it was.

Tigr.

And all our friends are well?

Lyg.

All very well.

Spa.

Though I have done nothing but what was good, I dare not see my Father, it was fault enough not to acquaint him with that good.

Lyg.

Madam I should have seen you.

Spa.

O good Sir forgive me.

Lyg.

Forgive you, why? I am no kin to you, am I?

Spa.

Should it be measur'd by my mean deserts, indeed you are not.

Lyg.

Thou couldest prate unhappily ere thou couldst go, would thou couldst do as well, and how does your custome hold out here?

Spa.

Sir?

Lyg.

Are you in private still, or how?

Spa.

What do you mean?

Lyg.

Do you take mony? are you come to sell sin yet? perhaps I can help you to liberal Clients: or has not the King cast you off yet? O thou vile creature, whose best commendation is, that thou art a young whore, I would thy Mother had liv'd to see this, or rather that I had died ere I had seen it; why didst not make me acquainted when thou wert first resolv'd to be a whore, I would have seen thy hot lust satisfied more privately: I would have kept a dancer and a whole consort of musicians in my own house only to fiddle thee.

Spa.

Sir, I was never whore.

Lyg.

If thou couldst not say so much for thy self, thou shouldst be carted.

Tigr.

Lygones, I have read it, and I like it, you shall deliver it.

Lyg.

Well Sir, I will: but I have private business with you.

Tigr.

Speak, what is't?

Lyg. How has my age deserv'd so ill of you, that you can pick no strumpets i'th' land, but out of my breed?

Tigr.

Strumpets, good Lygones?

Lyg.

Yes, and I wish to have you know, I scorn to get a whore for any prince alive, and yet scorn will not help methinks: my Daughter might have been spar'd, there were enow besides.

Tigr.

May I not prosper but she's innocent as morning light for me, and I dare swear for all the world.

Lyg.

Why is she with you then? can she wait on you better than your man, has she a gift in plucking off your stockings, can she make Cawdles well or cut your cornes? Why do you keep her with you? For a Queen I know you do contemn her, so should I, and every subject else think much at it.

Tigr.

Let 'em think much, but 'tis more firm than earth: thou see'st thy Queen there.

Lyg.

Then have I made a fair hand, I call'd her Whore. If I shall speak now as her Father, I cannot chuse but greatly rejoyce that she shall be a Queen: but if I shall speak to you as a States-man, she were more fit to be your whore.

Tigr.

Get you about your business to Arbaces, now you talk idlely.

Lyg.

Yes Sir, I will go, and shall she be a Queen? she had more wit than her old Father, when she ran away: shall she be Queen? now by my troth 'tis fine, I'le dance out of all measure at her wedding: shall I not Sir?

Tigr.

Yes marry shalt thou.

Lyg.

I'le make these withered kexes bear my body two hours together above ground.

Tigr.

Nay go, my business requires hast.

Lyg.

Good Heaven preserve you, you are an excellent King.

Spa.

Farwell good Father.

Lyg.

Farwell sweet vertuous Daughter, I never was so joyfull in all my life, that I remember: shall she be a Queen? Now I perceive a man may weep for joy, I had thought they had lyed that said so.

[Exit Lygones.

Tigr.

Come my dear love.

Spa.

But you may see another may alter that again.

Tigr.

Urge it no more, I have made up a new strong constancy, not to be shook with eyes: I know I have the passions of a man, but if I meet with any subject that should hold my eyes more firmly than is fit, I'le think of thee, and run away from it: let that suffice.

[Exeunt all.

Enter Bacurius And his Servant.

Bac.

Three Gentlemen without to speak with me?

Ser.

Yes Sir.

Bac.

Let them come in.

Enter Bessus with the two Sword-men.

Ser.

They are entred Sir already.

Bac.

Now fellows your business? are these the Gentlemen?

Bes.

My Lord, I have made bold to bring these Gentlemen, my friends o'th' Sword along with me.

Bac.

I am afraid you'l fight then.

Bes.

My good Lord, I will not, your Lordship is much mistaken, fear not Lord.

Bac.

Sir, I am sorry for't.

Bes.

I ask no more in honour, Gentlemen you hear my Lord is sorry.

Bac.

Not that I have beaten you, but beaten one that will be beaten: one whose dull body will require a laming, as Surfeits do the diet, spring and fall; now to your Sword-men; what come they for, good Captain Stock-fish?

Bes.

It seems your Lordship has forgot my name.

Bac.

No, nor your nature neither, though they are things fitter I must confess for any thing, than my remembrance, or any honest mans: what shall these Billets do; be pil'd up in my wood-yard?

Bes.

Your Lordship holds your mirth still, Heaven continue it: but for these Gentlemen, they come--

Bac.

To swear you are a Coward, spare your book, I do believe it.

Bes.

Your Lordship still draws wide, they come to vouch under their valiant hands I am no Coward.

Bac.

That would be a show indeed worth seeing: sirra be wise, and take Mony for this motion, travel with it, and where the name of Bessus has been known or a good Coward stirring, 'twill yield more than a tilting. This will prove more beneficial to you, if you be thrifty, than your Captainship, and more natural: men of most valiant hands is this true?

2 Sword.

It is so, most renowned.

Bac.

'Tis somewhat strange.

1 Sword.

Lord, it is strange, yet true; we have examined from your Lordships foot there, to this mans head, the nature of the beatings; and we do find his honour is come off clean and sufficient: this as our swords shall help us.

Bac.

You are much bound to your Bil-bow-men, I am glad you are straight again Captain; 'twere good you would think on some way to gratifie them, they have undergone a labour for you, Bessus would have puzl'd hercules with all his valour.

2 Sword.