Drunken Love by Que Son (to read list TXT) 📖

success. But he couldn't say the words. He could only hugged her, wiped off her tears, and comforted her.

 

Then the evening came. Seven o'clock, and outside it was dark, they did not see anymore daylight through the narrow parting in the window curtain. Time was coming to an end.

 

They took a shower for the last time but this time Eve did not dry his hairs for him. She put her clothes on then prepared him a meal with the noodles and soup she had brought the night before. He ate some, but had no appetite. They hugged and kissed. He said this had been the happiest day of his life. She said she would not ask for anything more, that she was satisfied that her wish had been fulfilled, and she didn't look forward to anything else. They would each return to their own life, live their separate lives again, but they knew they always loved each other. Always, until death--and beyond.

 

Holding hands, they walked through the dark parking lot. He returned the key to the motel's office then got into the car. Eve was in the driver's seat, looking at him.

 

"We will drive around a little before going to the airport." Adam said.

 

The air had turned chill and there was a gentle breeze. Eve drove up a deserted boulevard and Adam played the Andy Gibb CD again. He felt sad looking at the desolation around him. After half an hour, Adam said let's turn back and Eve made a U-turn and headed in the direction of the airport. She glanced at him and reached over and took his hand while keeping the other hand on the steering wheel. And she did not let go of his hand.

 

After checking in, they went back to the parking lot and sat in the back seat of the car and Eve curled up in his lap. It was thirty minutes before the flight. They shared a cigarette. He kissed her on her head, then on her lips again and again and again and again.

 

"I know you are sad. You are so sad that you forgot to hold my hand," Eve said. "We had a wonderful day together that we will remember for the rest of our life. Think about that so you be comforted. All is too late for us. I cannot relive my life for you and you for me. I have a family to take care of. And you have your own responsibilities. What can we do now is cherish the memory and live out our life. We can't be together."

 

"If in the future we talk on the phone less and I email you less, don't think that I've forgot you. Think that I always love you. You are always in my heart no matter where I am and no matter what the circumstances." Adam said.

 

Silence.

 

Then he said: "You may not feel sad now because we are still together this moment. But beware, it will sink in slowly as the days pass."

 

At nine o'clock, he told her to start the engine, turn on the headlights, wear the seatbelt, then he kissed her again. She still had that bright smile on her face but wasn't looking at him--she was looking into the distance. Then he tore himself away and walked into the terminal. The flight was scheduled for 9:30.

 

In the airplane, whenever Adam closed his eyes, he saw Eve and felt again her kisses and hugs and the feeling was as real as if she was actually still with him. He felt cold and his body shook. He missed her already. Terribly. He felt that he loved her even more, much more, a million times more than before he had seen her, because today she had given him not only her heart, but also her body, completely and fully, without holding anything back. The love had been consummated, and that was why he loved her more, much more. The realization cut his heart like a thousand knives. He felt broken--and he cried. Why can't we have each other? Why do we have to separate again?

 

Shakespeare thinks that another chapter of the long story of Adam and Eve has opened and now ends. It ends with another separation, and this time, like the last time, nobody knows how long it might be. But Shakespeare knows one thing makes Adam feels better, and perhaps Eve too, is that they are not going to lose contact again. Shakespeare continues to pace the room and imagines Adam saying to himself after coming back to New York:

 

"I am back. The fourteen hours with you were the happiest of my life. But it is a gross understatement. What I want to say is ... if there was one happy day of my life, it was Feb 23, 20XX, the day we met after 27 years of separation. Before we met, I had told myself to curb my enthusiasm, to lower my expectation, because I felt apprehensive about what I was going to see: the you of today might not be the you that I knew 27 years ago. But all my fears proved so wrong. I was overwhelmed by your love, it was too sweet, too sincere, too devoting--too much. I literally swam in the boundless ocean of your love. You are a beautiful woman. Your eyes are bright and your smiles are refreshing. You are a wonderful woman. You are a perfect woman. You are caring and attentive. The love you made was unreserved, you held nothing back--I have no word to describe the sweetness of your affection. When I lied in your arms and laid my head on your chest and you caressed my hairs, I felt so peaceful, so reassuring, so secure, I thought that I have returned home at last after years of wandering in the desert. I have never in my life hugged anybody with such love and devotion. To be in the arms of the beloved is a divine blessing--and I was blessed--by you. I was the happiest person on earth when you held me tight in your arms and kissed me on my lips, not one or two kisses, but kiss after kiss after kiss after kiss after kiss. "Have I kissed you enough?" You asked, and I said no. When you laid your head on my shoulders and closed your eyes and I wrapped my arms around you, you smiled, I knew you were happy, and your happiness was my happiness. It was the happy day of my life. We did not come out of the room for the whole day. We stayed inside and in bed together. Because we would not want to waste any moment loving each other. You gave me all and I gave you all. And the love we made. You said that all your life you had been waiting for this day so you could give me what you had always wanted to give me: your body. And you did. The moments of sexual intercourse were just as satisfying as when we wrapped ourselves in one another's arms and listened to the beating of our hearts. Then there were the rings we put on each other's fingers to declare to ourselves that for that day we were husband and wife--the wish fulfilled at last. I thought I could never cry again, but on separation at the end of the day, I could not hold back the tears, you just did not see them. Separation stabbed me in my heart. After seeing you and spending the day of my life with you, one thing became clear to me, that I love you more than ever, much more, perhaps more than when we were young, because our love is now complete: body and soul. But why did you let me go at the end of the day? Why did you not let me die in your arms, so we could be together forever? I am having a fever right now--missing you."

 

The days immediately after the meeting were rough for Adam. On the train going home from the airport, he felt sad and angry and had to fight the tears that welled up in his eyes. Sad because he had to separate from Eve again, angry because he cannot be with her whom Adam thought was such a wonderful woman. He thought he would be the happiest man if she were his wife. He wanted to possess her, to have her for himself for the rest of his life--into death and beyond. The happiness of the reunion had turned into the agony of parting. He emailed Eve and wrote that why did she let him go, why did she not let him die in her arms while in that motel room, because that way he could be with her forever. Eve wrote back that he must not talk nonsense, that they must face reality, and reality was that they could not be together, that they would have to continue to live different lives, perhaps to the end.

 

For Eve, the first few days after the meeting were not too bad. She felt ok because her wish of seeing her old lover had been fulfilled. But as days went by, the missing and the sadness began to eat at her. She shut herself up in her room and talked to no one, and played again in her mind events of the day she met him. She wrote that she had lost again what she valued most in her life: him. She remembered about how Adam had held her in his arms, she remembered the greedy kisses, the sincere and passionate love they made to each other, the happiness, the ecstasy and the orgasms that she had never felt before. All the memories came slowly back and made her sad. She wrote him the most passionate emails since they re-contacted. And each Saturday morning, Adam would call and she would already be sitting in her closet waiting for his call and she would swallow each word he said like a person dying of thirst swallowing each drop of water in a burning desert. Then they would make plans for their future, not the future in this life, but in the next. And they were not joking because they sincerely believe that they would meet again in the next incarnation. Eve had said that she had seen and been haunted by the image of Adam and she could not explain why--since she was 12 years old, and his image was on her mind daily until she met him; and because of that, she believed that they had been pursuing each other through many lifetimes. Adam said in the next life they would not make the same mistakes like they did in this and they would be husband and wife and she would bear him six children and they would be happy together. Eve said she would do that for him but he must promise her that he will be faithful to her, that he must love her and her alone and not mess with any other women because she is a very emotionally selfish woman and if he fools around and she finds out she would leave him without regret. And he would also have to make a lot of money to take care of her and their children. Adam said yes.

 

Three weeks after the meeting, Eve wrote an email that seemed to show she was recovering from the madness. She wrote that they could not go on like this, because there could be no satisfactory resolution to the affair except they must forget each other and each must go on with their own life. She wrote that she must now redirect her attention to her own family, that her husband was a good man who made a lot of money and she needed him. She had said she and her husband once said to each other that if they hit the