Bound to Her by Deborah Pin (popular books to read .txt) đź“–
- Author: Deborah Pin
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you.”
“Are you staying in town because of me?”
He again stared. This conversation was becoming more strained by
the moment. Basically, he didn’t want to have the conversation and she
did. “Is your safety not a good enough reason?”
“I don’t know how to feel about that.”
“You mean you don’t know how to feel about me and my choice to
stay for you.” He shook his head in frustration and reached for the door
handle.
She clasped his arm quickly. “Please. I just don’t want to be the reason
your career is ruined. I don’t want to be the reason you’re missing time
away with Seth. I don’t want to be the reason you make these decisions.”
“Then what do you want to be the reason for?” His voice was harsh
and his eyes were angry. “I just made love to you. I did that for a reason
—a very specific reason.” His eyes were searching hers. “I care about you. What the hell is wrong with that reason?” And then his voice trailed
off and his eyes moved from hers to stare out the window.
She sat frozen beside him, her heart pounding as his words echoed through her mind over and over again. She could hear her own voice telling him she loved him. He may not have said it to her but she still knew she did. At the very least she should tell him she cared about him
too.
Saying nothing was the cruelest thing she could do but it wasn’t for
want of being cruel. She just couldn’t quite figure out what to say. He gave up on her and pulled the door open, leaving her staring after him.
Now it was three hours later and she was sitting in her classroom during her reading group, staring off into space as the students read. The
group sat in a circle and after reading a section of material, it was something of a roundtable discussion about what they’d read. Seth was
there and she kept catching him looking up at her.
When it was time to discuss the section they’d just read, his hand went up instantly. “Yes, Seth.”
“What happened to your neck, Ms. Page?”
“Oh…” Odd to think but she’d nearly forgotten about it. Her entire body ached—her shoulders, her back, every last inch. The majority from
the attack and a few very personal places from Dillon’s most incredible
invasion on her body and yet, she’d not been thinking about the pain.
“It’s nothing.”
He stared at her with his father’s eyes. It was concern, it was
suspicion. He wasn’t fooled by her and she couldn’t help but wonder just
what Dillon had told him. She hadn’t thought he’d speak of her case at
all but Seth wasn’t doing a good job of hiding the fact he knew something. She steered the conversation back to the reading but Seth continued to watch her.
“Are you okay, Ms. Page?” She peered up to Seth as the rest of the group filed out of the room.
“I’m fine, Seth. How are you?”
“I know my dad’s investigating something that has to do with you.”
“And did your dad tell you that?”
“No. My dad won’t talk to me about that stuff. I can just tell. I know
you were hurt a while back and I can just tell by the way he acts around
you. And you’re hurt again and he was gone last night. I can tell he’s worried about you.”
“And how’s that?”
“Like he acts when I get hurt.” The tone of his voice suggested she was insane not to understand this. “Just like when Molly and Jake were
in a car accident a few years ago. I know he’s not going on spring break
because he’s worried about you.”
“Seth…” What the hell could she say? “I don’t want that.” She
swallowed hard over a lump in her throat. She couldn’t have this
conversation with him but she also couldn’t not have this conversation with him.
“I don’t care. Jake’s going and Molly will be there too. I really don’t care.” Again, he sounded like a teenager but he really was trying to reassure her as much his thirteen-year-old maturity level would allow. It
was sweet but she couldn’t say she felt any better about the situation.
Seth had no idea what his father meant to her. He also had no idea what
she meant to Dillon. Awkward was the understatement of the century.
“I was just saying it’s cool with me. And I’m sorry about—whatever
happened.”
“Thanks, Seth. I appreciate it.” And she did. It was the sweetest thing
a thirteen-year-old boy could say to a grownup. He might have thought
she was crazy for not understanding everything he was trying to say and
he might not have a clue just how serious the situation really was but it
was compassion usually not seen in a kid his age.
He turned from her to leave but then stopped and turned back slowly
to face her. “Do you have a crush on my dad?”
“What? No. No. That’s not…” Lie lie lie.
“It’s cool if you do. I know he likes you. Just sayin’.” And then he was
gone.
* * * * *
When she got to Imogen’s home that evening, Detectives Smith and
Terrell were waiting outside the security gate parked at the curb.
“Well there’s no surveillance video in the parking garage.” They
followed her into Imogen’s home. “So there’s no security video.”
She could have told them that but she just nodded.
“And we’re assuming he entered the parking garage on foot. He’d
have to have a permit to enter with a car but we’re still checking into all
the vehicles that were there last night. I just wouldn’t expect anything with that.”
She started zoning out. She was tired and they weren’t telling her anything new. This man didn’t want to be found and he was doing a damn good job of keeping it that way.
They’d found her bags and jacket in the stairwell and set the items on
the kitchen counter as she offered them tea. They declined and in less than ten minutes they were leaving.
Imogen called while she was fixing dinner. It was late in the UK and she was just getting back from having drinks with a couple of her old friends. Katrina could tell she was half drunk and though she knew Imogen would be livid later, Katrina decided not to bother telling her about the parking-garage incident, or the sex incident for that matter.
When they finally hung up, Katrina sat at the dining room table alone to
eat the chicken she’d managed to burn. She stared at the emptiness around her, feeling pathetic.
She missed Dillon and she was certain she’d pissed him off that
morning. She had no idea how to feel about him or what had happened
between them. She wanted him in the way she’d finally had him but she
knew it was a risk to his career. Could she put an end to it with him to
protect that? She didn’t hold out much hope she could. If she had the opportunity to be with him again there was no chance she could say no
to him. She needed him. She cared for him too. Hell, she just plain loved
him.
She curled up in bed with her phone and started typing. “Are you upset with me?”
His response came nearly ten minutes later and left her convinced
he’d contemplated not responding at all. “Usually.”
“I’m sorry.”
There was no response after that and thirty minutes later she gave up
waiting for one and fell asleep.
* * * * *
“Are you sure you’re not really into Ms. Page?” Molly was just
finishing up packing as he lay across her bed. Seth and Jake were downstairs loading their bags into Molly’s Traverse.
Dillon was now technically on vacation for the next week too, though
he’d be spending the week sitting alone afraid to go to San Francisco lest
the woman he was secretly pining over be attacked again. It promised to
be a great time staring at his walls with nothing at all to do. Her reaction the morning before had been a disappointment—not that she’d
necessarily said anything wrong.
Even as he was confessing to caring about her he knew he was
holding back. He was in love with her but she’d not even managed to reciprocate his mildest of emotional confessions, so he certainly wasn’t going to be giving her any more than that. But none of it really mattered.
She could decide she hated him tomorrow and he still couldn’t bear to leave her and be too far away from her knowing her life was in danger.
“Molly, it doesn’t matter how I feel.” He sounded like Seth as he said
it—annoyed that she couldn’t understand the situation telepathically.
“Something happened and it didn’t exactly end the way I’d have liked it
to.”
“Something as in…”
He stared for a moment, contemplating, considering, debating. “Fuck
it. I slept with her.” Molly’s mouth fell open. “A couple nights ago and
the next morning…it was—I don’t know what it was. Things just fell apart.”
Molly still hadn’t managed to close her mouth so he continued. “She’s
worried about how a relationship with me could hurt my career, she’s worried I’m making decisions based on how I feel about her and I guess
she doesn’t want me to. Or…I don’t know. I mean she likes me. I know
she does and she’s said as much but then when it came to my staying here for spring break or the idea that I was going against the rules being
with her, she was upset.”
“You slept with her?” Apparently Molly’s brain had shut down after
that first statement.
“Molly! Focus.”
“Fine, fine. She probably feels guilty that you could endanger your career for her. She probably also feels guilty you’re staying here rather than coming with us to San Francisco. I mean, put yourself in her position.”
“I’m doing this for her!”
“And that can leave anyone feeling guilty. You’re sacrificing for her.
That’s great, that’s noble, I get it but maybe she doesn’t quite think she
deserves that. Does she know you love her?”
“I didn’t say I love her.” He said it defensively.
Molly gave him her cocked head annoyed expression. “And you
don’t?”
He sighed. “I do.” He sounded damn near pissed off about the admission.
“If she doesn’t know that, then it’s really no wonder she doesn’t quite
understand your motive. It’s no wonder she feels guilty. I’d feel the same
way in her position. If you love her and you’re willing to take risks for her and compromise certain things for her, then she needs to understand
why you’re making those decisions for her.”
“Shut up.” He rolled his eyes as he turned onto his back and stared at
Molly’s ceiling.
The boys came in, jumped on the bed and started singing “I Left My
Heart in San Francisco.” They’d been tormented by Molly and Dillon with this particular song on every last car trip they’d taken to San Francisco and they were finally old enough to turn the tables. They had
nothing on Tony Bennett and as they wailed the tune in their best vibrato, Molly and Dillon laughed and Dillon socked Seth in the face with Molly’s pillow.
It was hard to rationalize not going with them when Katrina couldn’t
even seem to understand his need to be close to her. But the moment he
let his mind wander to the ugly things that could potentially happen to
her, there was just no choice. He couldn’t physically force himself to put
that much distance between them. He’d go insane if he couldn’t be close.
Dillon walked them out to the car on his way out and gave Seth a quick hug. “Hey, Dad, take care of my teacher. I’m actually getting a good grade in her class.” Dillon let out a strained laugh at Seth’s words
and then said nothing. There was nothing he could say but Seth’s
somewhat serious expression said plenty. He was worried.
“I’ll see you in a week and a half. Say hi to Grandma and Grandpa for
me.” He watched them pull away before walking to his own house and
flopping down in front of the TV. He wanted to call her but he was so fucking confused about what to think. Molly was right. She’d put him on
the spot and expected him to explain just why he was making the
decisions he was making in regard to her and he’d failed to deliver. He’d
told her he cared about her.
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