Lust by Abigail Livinghouse (good ebook reader TXT) 📖

he became my wildest and most favorite dream after awhile.

 

  "They'll tear you apart you know. Please my love, don't do this."

 

  The last thing he said to me, and I did not regret not listening to him. The only thing I did regret was not telling him how much I loved him. I knew that he knew that I was only saying that I would kill him because he wouldn't let me go. The truth is, I couldn't kill Pearce even if I wanted to. Even when I wanted to I couldn't kill him, and that was what made me realize that he was different.

 

 Pearce, wherever you are, I want you to know that I love you. I know you only had my best interest in mind with this whole thing, and I hate to admit but you were right. I'm sorry. I love you so much, I wish I could say I hope to see you again someday but I don't want you to die in order to see me. If anything do me one last favor, live. For me. I love you.

 

 The best I could do, but I couldn't speak, not with the pain and blood clogging up my throat. I could feel a warmth spreading through my body, and I wondered if it was the last warm feeling I would experience until I left this world. Well, I can only find out . . . 

Chapter Eighteen

"Kyla!"

 

 A voice? Was I dead? Was this God?

 

 "Kyla! Please!"

 

  I scowled. This didn't seem right. Who in the world would be calling me? And that voice sounded way too familiar. This couldn't possibly be heaven or hell. It was too cold to be hell and way too uncomfortable to be heaven. So, where was I?

 

  "Kyla baby you have to wake up, c'mon love you can do it."

 

 Pearce? Was he dead too? I sure hoped not, I thought I basically said, or maybe thought? Well it didn't matter, the point was I wanted him of all things to live. Out of the two of us, since I was already dead, that was the least he could do.

 

  "Kyla can you hear me? Kyla I love you, you're my everything. Your'e gonna be alright, you just gotta wake up. Please? Let me see those beautiful eyes of yours, darling."

 

 I grimaced. Please, Pearce tell me you're alive!

 

  "You are my everything Kyla Tyler, do you hear me? Everything. I can't go on without you I need you, you are my life, my soul mate. You mean more to be than the entire world, you are my whole world. So don't you dare give up on me!"

 

 I could've cried, I could feel the lump in my throat. Wait. I could feel it? Hmm, and I also felt really god damn cold. Except for a heat at my belly, and a staggering pain right there that was definitely real. Without any kind of warning, I was brought back to reality with a jolt, my eyes flew open and I gasped, turning and spewing out blood as someone gently rubbed my back.

 

 "Kyla!" The person rubbing my back hugged me and began kissing my shoulder blades, my shoulders, my neck, my head, anything they could possibly reach.           

 

"Don't ever scare me like that again!" Pearce's scolding tone softened at the end as his arms wrapped around me, cradling me to his chest.

 

 I groaned, feeling my stomach throbbing and burning, and as I looked down to see a mess of red I remembered what had happened.

 

  "W-who stabbed me?" I muttered, gazing around the room that seemed empty except for a few people huddled around Pearce and I. Looking around, Miramar, Trine, Elizabeth, and Kenneth were all standing above us. Miramar and Trine were standing right next to each other, to my utter surprise. While Elizabeth leaned against Kenneth with his arms wrapped around her.

 

 "Don't worry about that now baby." Pearce murmured, kissing my hair.

 

  "It hurts", I said as I sighed, wincing.

 

 "I know love, the healing sometimes hurts just as much as the actual wound." He informed me, and I looked up at him in confusion. He grinned softly, and that's when I saw the faint trace of blood on his lips.

 

 "You . . . healed me?" I managed before I closed my eyes and dropped my head against his chest. I could feel myself slipping, it wouldn't be much longer until I was out. He nodded against my hair.

 

 "You're going to be just fine. You're going to be fine." Pearce whispered, rubbing my back. It sounded like he was talking more to himself than me, but I didn't have time to think about that. I could already feel reality shifting around me.

 

"Don't . . . leave." I got out through barely parted lips.

Chapter Nineteen

When I opened my eyes again, I was looking at our the ceiling of our small cottage bedroom. There was barely any light in the room. It must've been early in the morning.  

 

I sat up, and was immediately hit with a searing pain in my stomach. I gasped, clutching my midsection and leaning against the headboard. The events of last night-or whenever the fight had been, came rushing back to me in a very unpleasant burst. My head throbbed just thinking about it. I grimaced. So many people . . . dead . . . because of me.  

 

"Kyla? Are you awake?" Pearce peeked inside the room, his gray eyes shimmering and blonde hair perfectly messy. Even though he couldn't produce tears, the expression on his pale and beautiful face was so despairingly sad.  

 

My throat closed up as my heart swelled, remembering his sobbing yesterday when I had gotten hurt. "Yes. I’m awake."  

 

He smiled but didn't show his teeth, as he made his way into the room. Gently he sat down on the edge of the bed as not to move me too much, and just sat there. He seemed to be staring at my stomach and his hands were on his thighs. He wasn't touching me . . .  

 

"Pearce?" I asked, my concern rising when he still wouldn't meet my gaze. "Are you okay?"  

 

He chuckled, but it was devoid of emotion. "I should be asking you the same thing."  

 

I shut my mouth, feeling fear build up in my chest. He still would not look at me.  

 

"Pearce?" I tried to look into his eyes. He just wouldn't let me. "Pearce! Why won't you look at me?" I screeched frantically, and reached out to put my hand his shoulder, but in a flash he had his back to the wall in front of me, too far for me to touch.  

 

His gray eyes had turned a shining silver, and his face was drawn in shadow. My fear increased and my eyes widened. I moved to stand up, but was seized with another spasm of agony resonated in my gut. I gritted my teeth and barely suppressed another gasp, but stood anyway.  

 

"No", Pearce held up his hands. "Lay down Kyla. You shouldn't be up until you're healed."  

 

"Pearce please." I begged, taking a step forward despite his warning. "Why won't you look at me? Or let me touch you?"  

 

His arms dropped to his sides, and he took a step away from me, his back pressed against the wall once again.  

 

"Because Kyla. What happened to you . . . it was all my fault. I refuse to have anyone's blood on my hands again, especially yours." He said in a grave tone, his eyes cast down.  

 

My blood ran cold. I was left speechless in horror. How could he blame himself for what had happened? He had it all wrong.  

 

"Pearce, please for the love of god do not blame yourself. None of this was your fault at all. Please." I begged him, my voice quivering with tears. I moved forward to touch him again but he beat me to it.  

 

Pearce rushed towards me and clamped my arms to my sides, his expression stern. Gently, he guided me back to the bed and sat me down.  

 

"Lay down Kyla." He repeated in a soft voice.  

 

I blinked, still completely dumbfounded at what he had said. I found my voice a few minutes after staring into Pearce's tortured gray eyes once he finally looked at me, barely being able to speak without feeling my eyes fill up.

 

"Not unless you lay down with me." I whispered.  

 

He sighed, shaking his head and closing his eyes. He kept them shut for a few moments before looking at me, searching my face.  

 

"Fine." He consented.  

 

He helped me get my legs back on the bed, with his feather light touch he caused me no pain at all. Pearce rounded the bed and with the same about of gentleness as before, laid down next to me. I rolled very slowly onto my side so I could see him, wincing slightly.  

 

"Kyla stop, you'll only hurt yourself further." He said disapprovingly at all my movement. I scowled at him.  

 

"I want to see you." I said defiantly, and moved anyway.  

 

He pursed his lips but said nothing. I was now facing him, and I was pleased that he had no choice but to look at me. His deep gray eyes were filled with such sorrow, such pain, that I felt the tears threatening again.  

 

I reached out and placed my hand on his cheek. He closed his eyes as soon as I touched him. His skin was so soft, and so cold. I took a moment to study his breathtaking features. His full pink lips, straight jaw,  jagged white blond hair hanging in his face and eyes, and his eyes. Oh, his beautiful big eyes that were shut now, almost as if he was in pain.  

 

I leaned forward, about to kiss those perfectly carved lips, when Pearce's eyes opened and filled with alarm.  

"Don't", he said, and reached out to place his hands on either side of my face, halting me. "Just don't, Kyla."  

 

His rejection stung and my breath physically felt knocked out of me. I swallowed, looking away from him.  

 

"I'm sorry." I murmured, and the tears began to fall against my will.  

 

"Don't cry." Pearce's voice was now terrified. Of what, I wasn't sure. "Kyla baby, please don't cry." He said, taking his hands away and softly caressing my cheek with his knuckles.  

 

I gasped, sobbing at the same time and causing my stomach to hurt but I didn't even care. What