You're Not the Only One With Secrets - "YNTOOWS" by Lucia Roberts (books that read to you .txt) 📖

I crouch down to Vishnu "Why did you have to do that?" I asked him, and helplessly knowing he couldn't really answer I just let my hand run through his fur defeatedly. "Please don't do that next time; it took a lot out of me to do that." He nodded; or, at least I thought he did. Sometimes I swear he is... well, nah. That's just crazy… or me. "I'm getting up early" I told him. "But, tomorrow you can't follow me." He immediately leapt up onto all fours and growled down at me. "I'm serious Vishnu." He came up to me and put his nose almost touching mine; to show he was serious (about following me despite what I thought). "Am I going to have to make you?" I asked; raising my eyebrows. He looked down for a split second and then huffed in my face and went to the stairs. "What?" I asked, rather harshly, but I couldn't let him see that I regretted my tone.

When I didn't come, he pulled my breeches strings to try to tug me toward the stairs. "Alright, alright, I'm coming!" I followed him up to my bedroom, to the almost wall length wood framed mirror. He pressed his jaw to my shoulder to tell me to sit down. I did. He tapped the mirror with his nose. "I'm looking" I said.

He licked my pointed ear tip but when I laughed and tried to grab his in playful response, he tapped the mirror again, looking rather aggravated. "Ok, Ok, I'm sorry, I’m paying attention." I wondered what the point was, but I couldn't ask. He can't talk, and sometimes, I'm glad he can't. His gleaming, silver eyes do enough talking of their own.

He licked my ear again and then wiggled his toward the mirror so I could see. I nodded. He licked my hand which was resting on my knee, and he raised his paw and licked it. I see where he's going now. I think. He licked my lips and then licked his. "We're the same. That's what you're trying to tell me; isn't it?" He lay down so he could be at eye level with me and licked my cheek. "Well, despite, this time Vishnu…" I began. And with that, he got up and walked into the green bedroom. I was going to follow, but decided better of it. I went back downstairs to get my book, checked all the doors, and whispered to them the protective spell I always cast at nighttime. Vishnu must've heard me because he comes down and lies on the carpet we had slept on not but an hour ago. He always sleeps there when he’s angry with me, as if something could break my spell and get through the door just because he’s disgruntled. I don't know what would, or could for that matter, get through but he insisted. I looked at him, "Sweet night Vishnu" I said. He ignored me and kept staring at the fire. His black fur glistens like a raven’s feathers would in the light of the fire. I let out a breath and slowly climbed the stairs back to my room.

He was disappointed in my decision but he wouldn't like to be ‘chained to the house’ more than he would like to just not follow. I just didn't want him to see what I was going to do. For some reason, I just had this gut feeling that him watching would not be good; would be painful. I crawled into my bed; warmly surrounded by my maroon/gold/royal blue comforter and centered in-between my gold mosquito net canopy and closed my eyes. I was excited and tired at the same time.

I heard my personal lullaby chiming softly, but I didn't dare flinch because if I did, Vishnu would know I was awake (though barely) and leave. He has that guy-ish habit of not wanting me to know he sleeps in my room to watch me, or that he forgives me so quickly, or that he knows I sleep easier if I'm near him. He knows I don't like to depend on anyone for anything. So, he sneaks in when he thinks I'm asleep. I'm sure he does it every night. I wonder what it would be like if he were Fae sometimes. I know that other Fae have Companions too, and all Companions are always more Fae than all normal animals. They have to be, to be able to communicate and defend their Faerie properly. I can't let myself wonder too much though. Such things don't happen anymore. I turn over and smile softly when I hear Vishnu jump a little. I know it's wrong to like that he worries, but, it's nice to know he loves and cares for me like no-one else ever will. That’s what a spirit animal is supposed to do. I drift to sleep with the crazy thought of him being like the Beast in that Human story Beast by the Napoli lady; a small smile on my face and the melody from Vishnu's fur swirling around me.

It was still dark when my eyes opened, quickly. I was crouched in a defensive position on my bed; facing the window. Vishnu was looking at me curiously, slowly loosening his stiff, ready-to-pounce attitude. I shake my head and fall backwards on the bed. He jumps behind me and I fall into him. He huffs as I hit him though I’m not that heavy; he must've just been scared. It was still dark, but I sensed it was morning. I petted Vishnu, relinquishing myself to the charming music for a minute until he got up slowly and padded off the bed to the other bedroom. He's still angry with me. Well, that's fine. I've got to do this, or it will drive me insane that I can but don't. It'll only be this once.

I'm ready. I'm controlled. I am in control.

I crossed the bedroom slowly, silently, practicing. I must be perfect and I must not touch any'one'. I opened a window and made a breeze blow through the room, and though it was cold because I am a Fall Faerie, I barely noticed. I made myself concentrate and dodge every leaf that flowed by me pretending it was a being that could break the Magick of the invisibility spell. I got to the closet and let the breeze die, breathing in the fresh air that now filled the room and letting my skin soak up the precious starlight rays that were sifting into the room.

I ran through my assortment of garments looking for the perfect thing that would blend best with the outside world, yet not jeopardize agility if so need be. White would be best, as the sun is everywhere in that meadow. I looked through my whites, pulling out a corset style tank top that bared the stomach and then white breeches and their matching moccasins. I analyzed my choices just in case I've overlooked any possible situations. White for outdoors to better mask me without using so much power that it would take to cover black garb, check. Corset for tight assuredness, check. Breeches for agility, running/climbing, check. Moccasins, good for running, quiet; check. I put on my tan belt and let it hang on my hips so I could carry things without using my hands. I figure today I will need as much balance as I can get; meaning empty hands would be best.

After changing, I cut a vine from my honeysuckle plant and let it tie into my copper locks forming a sort of up-do so it would not be in the way. I was just about ready. I jumped down the stairs and went directly to the library, and in front of the shelf where I keep all my potions and herbs and spell making ingredients. I grabbed a mixing pouch and laced a sinew threw it, long enough to tie through the utility loop on my belt so it would stay if I knotted it a few times. I put a hint of belladonna, rosemary, a sprig of pine, some Amethyst, a vanilla flower and holly inside. If anything should go wrong, He won’t know what I am, and I will have an illusion mask if I say the right words fast enough.

Vishnu came down behind me so quietly that I jumped. I turned around and I was face to face with him. "I'm heading out" I said. "Will I have to keep you here?" He just looked at me. His eyes were so blank today. It was annoying, but I didn't have time... the sun was almost up. I looked at him one more time and closed the pouch shut; tying it to my belt. He just sat down on his haunches and watched me as I whispered the de-locking charm and slipped out into the morning darkness.

I waited until she was gone. Amaranth was always mischievous and quiet, and a hell of a girl to deal with when she gets a notion in her head. I rolled my eyes and lay down on the carpet with my head on my paws. I quickly moved them and placed them over my ears and dragged them over my eyes. I can't bear not knowing what she's doing. It makes me nervous not knowing what she's doing, where she is. The girl doesn't know what's good for her. Especially when she threatens to lock me up... lock ME up. I am Her guardian; her Companion. She should never leave me. All the bloody things that can happen to her... Curses...

I stopped thinking and I ran. I don't care if she is angry, or never speaks to me; at least right now I don’t care. My Lady could be hurt if I leave her. She can kill me if she wants; at least it will relieve me of this speechless agony. I cannot talk to her, I can barely watch her, nor can I tell her ... all of the things of great importance that ought to be said.

Pointless anger and restlessness within my heart found a hiding place inside me as I tried to