A bored girl tropes her life by Tal Lingenua (best way to read e books .txt) 📖

to click the button when Charm grabs my hand.

"What about May?"

"She can't speak."

"Baby's have to learn sometime right?"

"I don't want to corrupt my baby sister..."

Charm pats me on the shoulder, "she's just a baby. She won't get in any trouble."

I sigh and reluctantly climb to my feet, "I'm not worried about May."


Charm and I go across the hall to the second smallest bedroom in the house. The room that should be mine! It instead houses my baby sister, who's only needs a crib, rocking chair and changing table. (Just saying!) We creep over to the crib and see May is fast asleep. She looks so cute with her short blonde hair and chubby cheeks.

I was gonna make them flap foulness. I am such a bad big sister. I slowly lift May and gently walk over to the rocking chair. I rock back and forth and May's open. She looks around with her bright blue eyes. She sees my face and she starts giggling.

"Hi May. How awe woo?" I rub noses with her, and I'm feeling worse about what I'm about to do. She laughs and claps. She reaches and pulls on a strand of my hair. I can feel my heart melting. I turn to Charm, "I can't. "

Charm looks somewhat disappointed. "How are we gonna complete as many tropes as possible?"

I shrug and climb to my feet, "I don't know. But it's not worth teaching my baby sister how to curse." As I walk over to the crib something foul reaches my nose. I frown and turn May around and it's her who smells. "Ugh." I hold her at arms length and carry her to the changing table.

I'll spare you the details. As most of you know, changing diapers are gross! I pick up my clean baby sister and carry her over to the dresser. I open the second drawer, "here Charm, take this." I throw the old PJs to her. She catches them and drops them immediately.

"Ugh, it was sticky!" She waves her hands around, closes her eyes tight and let's out a squeal

"Come on, I changed an entire diaper. The least-" I watch as Charm runs blindly for the doorway. She misses it and smashes into the wall.

"Ow!" She grabs her face. She wipes her nose and looks at the blood, "dammit, I'm bleeding."

"Charm!" I point at May and spread my arm wide.

"Dammit." May says and giggles and repeats the word again and again.

"May, no!" I hear footsteps coming up the steps. "Why now? Why speak now?"

"We should run." Charm says. She sniffs and opens the door. I rush to the crib and lay my swearing sister inside of it then I scramble out the door with Charm.

(You thought I was gonna get a spanking didn't you? Well... I just told a blantant lie!)

Supeheroes

"Arc Number." I say and proceed to read the entry on TvTropes. "How do we pick one?"

"56." Charm says.

"That was... eerily fast. Why 56?"

"QueenTroper56, April Troper, Charm Rogers."

"Your name is Unlucky." I say.

"Even if, 56 still appears a lot."

"That's just my name and screen name."

"And your brother's number! It's settled. 56 is our arc number."

I sigh. I never even realized that my screen name contained my brother's jersey. I really gotta pay attention more.

"We should have arc words as well!" Charm grabs the mouse from me and presses the link. "Maybe it should be 'dammit', people say it a lot and May will be saying it for a while." She laughs so I whack her with a pillow.

"No." I say sternly, "what makes you think everyone will just start saying a phrase or it will randomly appear everywhere?"

Charm shrugs. "Maybe we don't pick it but keep are eyes and ears peeled."

I shrug in agreement, "fair enough." I scroll to the bottom of the screen and press the random button. "Viewers are Morons. This shouldn't be too hard."

"Do we even have to do anything? They are

reading this."

"I don't know who should be most insulted. Us, our readers or our author."

Charm pauses for a moment. Then she grabs the mouse, which my hand is on. She uses it to scroll, by running her finger across the mouse wheel, to the bottom of the webpage. The TvTropes webpage by the way. I realise this is more like Viewers are Goldfish, but of course you probably (read definitely) didn't notice that.

Anyway, if you managed to follow, Charm scrolls the mouse wheel to the bottom of the page and presses the blue random button.

"Superhero Episode." She says. A smile creeps across her face, "We get to be superheroes?"

"You're missing one minor detail. We don't have any applied phlebotinum."

"What about some sort of steroid?"

"Hey..." I trail off. My brother told me of a boy who offered him steroids once. I didn't want to ask him for anything.

Charm pokes me, "April? You're not teeellling me something."

I sigh, "Follow me."


Julian was sitting on a chair reading a superman comic. I knocked on the side of the wall of the second biggest bedroom in the house. (No, I'll never let it go!)

"Can't you read? No losers allowed!" Julian says.

I boldly step into his room and Charm follows. "We want steroids and I know you have them."

Julian jumps to his feet and rushes to close the door. "Don't go around shouting those things. Besides, I don't use them and they're not steroids."

"Mom still won't like that." I say, crossing my arms.

"She won't like the fact that you want them."

"That will just make things worse."

"What about you teaching May her first word?"

I sputter, "No one can prove that... it was Charm!"

Charm looks at me, "Thanks a lot."

Julian smirks, "I have something you want kept secret and I have something you want. I'll give it to you if you take out the trash if I spill it."

"What!? How's that fair?"

Julian shrugs. He has a smug look on his face.

"Okay." Charm says, "but you can't knock it over on purpose."

I give her the stink eye as Julian goes into the closest. He digs around until he finds a shoebox. He sets it on the bed and we all gather around as he lifts the lid.

There are three bottles. Green, red and blue.

"I got these from a guy named Sammy McGuire." Julian said, "He says it's safe unlike steriods. But you never know." He picks up the green bottle of Barry juice. "Why do you guys even want this?"

"We're gonna be superheroes." Charm says.

I do a facepalm. "You just broke the golden rule of superheroes! You don't go around telling people these things!"

"Sorry." Charm mutters.

Julian makes a thoughtful noise and I look at him. "No..."

"There are three bottles." He says, "besides, I know more about superheroes than you two."

Charm smiles. "We need a team name and a theme song."

"What about Five for Fighting's 'Superman'?" I say, "I can't stand to fly-"

"No." Julian says and picks up the three bottles. He hands the green one to Charm and the red one to me.

"I wanted the blue Barry juice." I whine.

"Let's get a few things straight right now." Julian says, "If you're gonna be my sidekicks you can't-"

"Whoa, whoa! Sidekicks?"

Julian flipped the bottle, "Well, naturally."

"No way! It was my idea."

"Well actually," Charm says, "You just pressed the random button."

I narrow my eyes at Charm, "Would you shut up for a second?"

"Look at it this way," Julian said, "I'm older, smarter, cooler and I made us superheroes. If that doesn't make me the leader than I don't know what will."

Imprint

Text: Me
Editing: April (yes, it's the April from the blurb)
Publication Date: 11-16-2012

All Rights Reserved

Dedication:
This is dedicated to boredom, for without it this would not exists.