Devereux — Complete by Baron Edward Bulwer Lytton Lytton (best free novels txt) 📖
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“Ha! ha! ha!” cried Chaulieu. “Who would have thought one could have found so much morality in a plate of asparagus! Taste this salsifis.”
“Pray, Hamilton,” said Huet, “what jeu de mot was that you made yesterday at Madame d’Epernonville’s which gained you such applause?”
“Ah, repeat it, Count,” cried Boulainvilliers; “‘t was the most classical thing I have heard for a long time.”
“Why,” said Hamilton, laying down his knife and fork, and preparing himself by a large draught of the champagne, “why, Madame d’Epernonville appeared without her tour; you know, Lord Bolingbroke, that tour is the polite name for false hair. ‘Ah, sacre!’ cried her brother, courteously, ‘ma soeur, que vous etes laide aujourd’hui: vous n’avez pas votre tour!’ ‘Voila pourquoi elle n’est pas si-belle (Cybele),’ answered I.”
“Excellent! famous!” cried we all, except Huet, who seemed to regard the punster with a very disrespectful eye. Hamilton saw it. “You do not think, Monsieur Huet, that there is wit in these jeux de mots: perhaps you do not admire wit at all?”
“Yes, I admire wit as I do the wind. When it shakes the trees it is fine; when it cools the wave it is refreshing; when it steals over flowers it is enchanting: but when, Monsieur Hamilton, it whistles through the key-hole it is unpleasant.”
“The very worst illustration I ever heard,” said Hamilton, coolly. “Keep to your classics, my dear Abbe. When Jupiter edited the work of Peter Huet, he did with wit as Peter Huet did with Lucan when he edited the classics: he was afraid it might do mischief, and so left it out altogether.”
“Let us drink!” cried Chaulieu; “let us drink!” and the conversation was turned again.
“What is that you say of Tacitus, Huet?” said Boulainvilliers.
“That his wisdom arose from his malignancy,” answered Huet. “He is a perfect penetrator* into human vices, but knows nothing of human virtues. Do you think that a good man would dwell so constantly on what is evil? Believe me—no. A man cannot write much and well upon virtue without being virtuous, nor enter minutely and profoundly into the causes of vice without being vicious himself.”
* A remark similar to this the reader will probably remember in the “Huetiana,” and will, I hope, agree with me in thinking it showy and untrue.—ED.
“It is true,” said Hamilton; “and your remark, which affects to be so deep, is but a natural corollary from the hackneyed maxim that from experience comes wisdom.”
“But, for my part,” said Boulainvilliers, “I think Tacitus is not so invariably the analyzer of vice as you would make him. Look at the ‘Agricola’ and the ‘Germania.’”
“Ah! the ‘Germany,’ above all things!” cried Hamilton, dropping a delicious morsel of sanglier in its way from hand to mouth, in his hurry to speak. “Of course, the historian, Boulainvilliers, advocates the ‘Germany,’ from its mention of the origin of the feudal system,—that incomparable bundle of excellences, which Le Comte de Boulainvilliers has declared to be le chef d’oeuvre de l’esprit humain; and which the same gentleman regrets, in the most pathetic terms, no longer exists in order that the seigneur may feed upon des gros morceaux de boeuf demi-cru, may hang up half his peasants pour encourager les autres, and ravish the daughters of the defunct pour leur donner quelque consolation.”
“Seriously though,” said the old Abbe de Chaulieu, with a twinkling eye, “the last mentioned evil, my dear Hamilton, was not without a little alloy of good.”
“Yes,” said Hamilton, “if it was only the daughters; but perhaps the seigneur was not too scrupulous with regard to the wives.”
“Ah! shocking, shocking!” cried Chaulieu, solemnly. “Adultery is, indeed, an atrocious crime. I am sure I would most conscientiously cry out with the honest preacher, ‘Adultery, my children, is the blackest of sins. I do declare that I would rather have ten virgins in love with me than one married woman!’”
We all laughed at this enthusiastic burst of virtue from the chaste Chaulieu. And Arouet turned our conversation towards the ecclesiastical dissensions between Jesuits and Jansenists that then agitated the kingdom. “Those priests,” said Bolingbroke, “remind me of the nurses of Jupiter: they make a great clamour in order to drown the voice of their God.”
“Bravissimo!” cried Hamilton. “Is it not a pity, Messieurs, that my Lord Bolingbroke was not a Frenchman? He is almost clever enough to be one.”
“If he would drink a little more, he would be,” cried Chaulieu, who was now setting us all a glorious example.
“What say you, Morton?” exclaimed Bolingbroke; “must we not drink these gentlemen under the table for the honour of our country?”
“A challenge! a challenge!” cried Chaulieu. “I march first to the field!”
“Conquest or death!” shouted Bolingbroke. And the rites of Minerva were forsaken for those of Bacchus.
CHAPTER VI. A COURT, COURTIERS, AND A KING.
I THINK it was the second day after this “feast of reason” that Lord Bolingbroke deemed it advisable to retire to Lyons till his plans of conduct were ripened into decision. We took an affectionate leave of each other; but before we parted, and after he had discussed his own projects of ambition, we talked a little upon mine. Although I was a Catholic and a pupil of Montreuil, although I had fled from England and had nothing to expect from the House of Hanover, I was by no means favourably disposed towards the Chevalier and his cause. I wonder if this avowal will seem odd to Englishmen of the next century! To Englishmen of the present one, a Roman Catholic and a lover of priestcraft and tyranny are two words for the same thing; as if we could not murmur at tithes and taxes, insecurity of property or arbitrary legislation, just as sourly as any other Christian community. No! I never loved the cause of the Stuarts,—unfortunate, and therefore interesting, as the Stuarts were; by a very stupid and yet uneffaceable confusion of ideas, I confounded it with the cause of Montreuil, and I hated the latter enough to dislike the former: I fancy all party principles are formed much in the same manner. I frankly told Bolingbroke my disinclination to the Chevalier.
“Between ourselves be it spoken,” said he, “there is but little to induce a wise man in your circumstances to join James the Third. I would advise you rather to take advantage of your father’s reputation at the French court, and enter into the same service he did. Things wear a dark face in England for you, and a bright one everywhere else.”
“I have already,” said I, “in my own mind, perceived and weighed the advantages of entering into the service of Louis. But he is old: he cannot live long. People now pay court to parties, not to the king. Which party, think you, is the best,—that of Madame de Maintenon?”
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