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Odds At The Clubs To The Amount Of Fifteen Thousand Pounds; So If It

Be A Girl I Shall Have To Pay That Out Of My Fifteen Thousand Pounds Per

Annum,  As Soon As I Fall Into It; If It Be A Boy,  And I Am Floored,  I

Shall Pocket Thirty Thousand Pounds By Way Of Consolation For The

Disappointment. They Are All Good Men."

 

"Yes,  But They Know You Never Pay."

 

"They Know I Never Do Now,  Because I Have No Money; But They Know I Will

Pay If I Come Into The Estate; And So I Will,  Most Honourably,  Besides A

Few More Thousands That I Have In My Book."

 

"I Congratulate You,  With All My Heart,  Major. How Old Is The Present

Lord B----?"

 

"I Have Just Been Examining The Peerage--He Is Sixtytwo; But He Is Very

Part 1 Chapter 27 Pg 130

Fresh And Hearty,  And May Live A Long While Yet. By-The-Bye,  Newland,  I

Committed A Great Error Last Night At The Club. I Played Pretty High,

And Lost A Great Deal Of Money."

 

"That Is Unfortunate."

 

"That Was Not The Error; I Actually Paid All My Losings,  Newland,  And It

Has Reduced The Stock Amazingly. I Lost Seven Hundred And Fifty Pounds.

I Know I Ought Not To Have Paid Away Your Money,  But The Fact Was,  As I

Was Hedging,  It Would Not Do Not To Have Paid,  As I Could Not Have Made

Up My Book As I Wished. It Is,  However,  Only Waiting A Few Weeks,  Till

Mrs M---- Decides My Fate,  And Then,  Either One Way Or The Other,  I

Shall Have Money Enough. If Your People Won'T Give You Any More Till You

Are Of Age,  Why We Must Send To A Little Friend Of Mine,  That'S All,  And

You Shall Borrow For Both Of Us."

 

"Borrow!" Replied I,  Not Much Liking The Idea; "They Will Never Lend Me

Money."

 

"Won'T They?" Replied The Major; "No Fear Of That. Your Signature,  And

My Introduction,  Will Be Quite Sufficient."

 

"We Had Better Try To Do Without It,  Major; I Do Not Much Like It."

 

"Well,  If We Can,  We Will; But I Have Not Fifty Pounds Left In My Desk;

How Much Have You?"

 

"About Twenty," Replied I,  In despair At This Intelligence; "But I Think

There Is A Small Sum Left At The Banker'S; I Will Go And See." I Took Up

My Hat And Set Off,  To Ascertain What Funds We Might Have In Store.

 

 

Part 1 Chapter 28 Pg 131

     I Am Over Head And Ears In Trouble About A Lady'S Ear-Rings; Commit

     Myself Sadly,  And Am Very Nearly Committed.

 

 

 

 

I Must Say,  That I Was Much Annoyed At This Intelligence. The

Money-Lenders Would Not Be Satisfied Unless They Knew Where My Estates

Were,  And Had Examined The Will At Doctors' Commons; Then All Would Be

Exposed To The Major,  And I Should Be Considered By Him As An Impostor.

I Walked Down Pall Mall In a Very Unhappy Mood,  So Deep In Thought,  That

I Ran Against A Lady,  Who Was Stepping Out Of Her Carriage At A

Fashionable Shop. She Turned Round,  And I Was Making My Best Apologies

To A Very Handsome Woman When Her Ear-Rings Caught My Attention. They

Were Of Alternate Coral And Gold,  And The Fac-Simile In Make To The

Chain Given By Nattee To Fleta. During My Last Visit,  I Had Often Had

Part 1 Chapter 28 Pg 132

The Chain In My Hand,  And Particularly Marked The Workmanship. To Make

More Sure,  I Followed Into The Shop,  And Stood Behind Her,  Carefully

Examining Them,  As She Looked Over A Quantity Of Laces. There Could Be

No Doubt. I Waited Till The Lady Rose To Go Away,  And Then Addressed The

Shopman,  Asking The Lady'S Name. He Did Not Know--She Was A Stranger;

But Perhaps Mr H----,  The Master,  Did,  And He Went Back To Answer The

Question. Mr H---- Being At That Moment Busy,  The Man Stayed So Long,

That I Heard The Carriage Drive Off. Fearful Of Losing Sight Of The

Lady,  I Took To My Heels,  And Ran Out Of The Shop. My Sudden Flight From

The Counter,  Covered With Lace,  Made Them Imagine That I Had Stolen

Some,  And They Cried Out,  "Stop Thief," As Loud As They Could,  Springing

Over The Counter,  And Pursuing Me As I Pursued The Carriage,  Which Was

Driven At A Rapid Pace.

 

A Man Perceiving Me Running,  And Others,  Without Their Hats,  Following,

With The Cries Of "Stop Thief," Put Out His Leg,  And I Fell On The

Pavement,  The Blood Rushing In Torrents From My Nose. I Was Seized,

Roughly Handled,  And Again Handed Over To The Police,  Who Carried Me

Before The Same Magistrate In Marlborough Street.

 

"What Is This?" Demanded The Magistrate.

 

"A Shoplifter,  Your Worship."

 

"I Am Not,  Sir," Replied I; "You Know Me Well Enough,  I Am Mr Newland."

 

"Mr Newland!" Replied The Magistrate,  Suspiciously; "This Is Strange,  A

Second Time To Appear Before Me Upon Such A Charge."

 

"And Just As Innocent As Before,  Sir."

 

"You'Ll Excuse Me,  Sir,  But I Must Have My Suspicions This Time. Where

Is The Evidence?"

 

The People Of The Shop Then Came Forward,  And Stated What Had Occurred.

"Let Him Be Searched," Said The Magistrate.

 

I Was Searched,  But Nothing Was Found Upon Me. "Are You Satisfied Now,

Sir?" Inquired I.

 

"By No Means. Let The People Go Back And Look Over Their Laces,  And See

If Any Are Missing; In The Meantime I Shall Detain You,  For It Is Very

Easy To Get Rid Of A Small Article,  Such As Lace,  When You Are Caught."

 

The Men Went Away,  And I Wrote A Note To Major Carbonnell,  Requesting

His Attendance. He Arrived At The Same Time As The Shopman,  And I Told

Him What Had Happened. The Shopman Declared That The Stock Was Not

Correct; As Far As They Could Judge,  There Were Two Pieces Of Lace

Missing.

 

"If So,  I Did Not Take Them," Replied I.

 

"Upon My Honour,  Mr B----," Said The Major,  To The Magistrate,  "It Is

Very Hard For A Gentleman To Be Treated In This Manner. This Is The

Second Time That I Have Been Sent For To Vouch For His Respectability."

Part 1 Chapter 28 Pg 133

 

"Very True,  Sir," Replied The Magistrate; "But Allow Me To Ask Mr

Newland,  As He Calls Himself,  What Induced Him To Follow A Lady Into The

Shop?"

 

"Her Ear-Rings," Replied I.

 

"Her Ear-Rings! Why,  Sir,  The Last Time You Were Brought Before Me,  You

Said It Was After A Gentleman'S Nose--Now It Appears You Were Attracted

By A Lady'S Ears; And Pray,  Sir,  What Induced You To Run Out Of The

Shop?"

 

"Because I Wanted Particularly To Inquire About Her Ear-Rings,  Sir."

 

"I Cannot Understand These Paltry Excuses; There Are,  It Appears,  Two

Pieces Of Lace Missing. I Must Remand You For Further Examination,  Sir;

And You Also,  Sir," Said The Magistrate,  To Major Carbonnell; "For If He

Is A Swindler,  You Must Be An Accomplice."

 

"Sir," Replied Major Carbonnell,  Sneeringly,  "You Are Certainly A Very

Good Judge Of A Gentleman,  When You Happen By Accident To Be In His

Company. With Your Leave,  I Will Send A Note To Another Confederate."

 

The Major Then Wrote A Note To Lord Windermear,  Which He Despatched By

Timothy,  Who,  Hearing I Was In Trouble,  Had Accompanied The Major. And

While He Was Away,  The Major And I Sat Down,  He Giving Himself All

Manner Of Airs,  Much To The Annoyance Of The Magistrate,  Who At Last

Threatened To Commit Him Immediately. "You'Ll Repent This," Replied The

Major,  Who Perceived Lord Windermear Coming In.

 

"You Shall Repent It,  Sir,  By God," Cried The Magistrate,  In a Great

Passion.

 

"Put Five Shillings In The Box For Swearing,  Mr B----. You Fine Other

People," Said The Major. "Here Is My Other Confederate,  Lord

Windermear."

 

"Carbonnell," Said Lord Windermear,  "What Is All This?"

 

"Nothing,  My Lord,  Except That Our Friend Newland Is Taken Up For

Shoplifting,  Because He Thought Proper To Run After A Pretty Woman'S

Carriage; And I Am Accused By His Worship Of Being His Confederate. I

Could Forgive His Suspicions Of Mr Newland In That Plight; But As For

His Taking Me For One Of The Swell Mob,  It Proves A Great Deficiency Of

Judgment; Perhaps He Will Commit Your Lordship Also,  As He May Not Be

Aware That Your Lordship'S Person Is Above Caption."

 

"I Can Assure You,  Sir," Said Lord Windermear,  Proudly,  "That This Is My

Relative,  Major Carbonnell,  And The Other Is My Friend,  Mr Newland. I

Will Bail Them For Any Sum You Please."

 

The Magistrate Felt Astonished And Annoyed,  For,  After All,  He Had Only

Done His Duty. Before He Could Reply,  A Man Came From The Shop To Say

Part 1 Chapter 28 Pg 134

That The Laces Had Been Found All Right. Lord Windermear Then Took Me

Aside,  And I Narrated What

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