Nothing Thoughts, Nothing Stories by Gab Follin (chapter books to read to 5 year olds .txt) š
- Author: Gab Follin
Book online Ā«Nothing Thoughts, Nothing Stories by Gab Follin (chapter books to read to 5 year olds .txt) šĀ». Author Gab Follin
A broken window screen
Just one night?
Could you tell me you love me
False accusations
Slow dance with me in the dark
Cigarettes and daisies
The sun must be a devil
Suicide is an option
How many kids do you want?
Inappropriate relationships
Canāt you see?
Give me your hand
J.r. slides
Sex at 4 a.m.
I donāt wanna go home
One night..
cigarettes and daisies
Cigarettes and daisies, a familiar scent when her being arrives.
Itās the same constantly, it never seems to change. Itās obvious when sheās current.
Her scent of cigarettes and daisies seemed to be embedded in his nose.
His lips graced her skin, and all he smelt was daisies. Once toward her lips, cigarette.
Do you think he ignored the cigarette for her daisies?
Pale fingers hovered above her lace trim.
The scent of daisies lingered.
The cigarette smell resided in her clothes. It was there reportedly throughout the removal.
Once she was bare, the only scent present was the daisies.
Do you think thatās why he removes her lace?
The answer is simply yes.
The daisy scent and her bare being is what the man desires.
It is however to her. She doesnāt want to just give him her daisies but instead wants him to experience the cigarettes too.
They lie in bed, relaxing and cooling down from the connection that just came between them.
She stared at him in awe, thinking that she was so very in love with this man.
He stared back, something else crossing his mind.
She sensed it dearly, an empty feeling bellowed in her stomach.
He looked at her with pleading eyes and told her that there was another.
Another woman who held his heart in her hand.
Another one who had him.
She assumed there was disloyalty, him cheating on her with this other.
But it wasnāt that.
No cheating involved, he claimed he hasnāt seen her in close to a year now.
She didnāt believe him, she still thought disloyal, he continued to explain to her.
He liked this woman, for years, but his chance to obtain her heart back was missed by his own stupidity.
He explained that it was his biggest regret, and that he still continues to regret it.
Her eyes welled with tears with each word spoken, her heart which she had given him was now crushed into pieces.
He felt ashamed and dishonored, he said.
She didnāt care at that point.
She told him to leave, he tried to keep talking but her ears refused to listen.
She didnāt want to be with someone who looks at her and thinks of someone else.
Would you blame her?
He left her alone, he left the house half dressed. She wasnāt sure if he drove home or stuck around for a while, but he wasnāt between these four walls anymore with her presence.
She was alone, by herself, with these thoughts of this other woman.
Heartbroken along with anger, she decided she would take shots for herself and get totally and utterly wasted.
She thought it was probably a bad idea, but, like before no care was shown.
She took shot after shot until she was up to 23.
She stopped and laid down on the bed that was so very comfortable 40 minutes ago, now it felt empty and used.
Just like her.
She laid there thinking about what she should do next.
Her thought: sleep.
Before her eyes closed for a nights of drunken slumber, her phone dinged.
She limply reached for her phone and switched it on to reveal his name, asking her to talk.
She replied with not right now and left it at that.
She closed her eyes, and tears fell from them. She decided it wasnāt worth it and slept peacefully.
Once it was morning, she awoke and immediately he came to mind.
She switched on her phone, and he had texted during the night and morning.
He told her that he meant to tell her, but he didnāt exactly know how he would tell her something that personal and shameful.
He said that his feelings towards this woman were dormant, nothing more than what it was but still there.
They exist, they still do. And it was existing during her whole relationship with him.
Out of panic she assumed, he told her that he very much liked her and only thought about her anymore.
That was just it.
The morning texts remained different, he didnāt say goodnight nor good morning, all it appeared to be was a āIām sorryā.
The words felt empty to her, he didnāt mean them.
She lied and said it was okay.
And he told her that he isnāt sure if they should see each other any longer.
She explained to him that what he said meant nothing to her as long as she was the only one.
She said that if itās just her, she doesnāt care. Meaning she didnāt want to hear about other women.
Solemnly, an okay was his response.
She plainly said itās okay once again and he replied with doubtfulness.
He didnāt believe her, and he was smart not to because her anger for him burned strongly.
She reassured him it was, and that she would prove it by not treating him like a vandal.
All he said was okay, once again and the conversation was left there.
Her heart hurt, and so did her headā¦ hangover.
She didnāt cry again but instead moved on with her life. She took a shower to wash away dried tears and thoughts.
She settled down in that bed with her laptop in hand and began to type.
Her feelings, her words onto a document.
Only her words could depict how she really felt, the stabbing in her chest while he told her the story of his first love and how heās never gotten over it.
It hurt her, and she knows it certainly hurt him.
She bets he regrets telling her, wanting to keep it hidden away in the back of his mind so she cannot hear nor see this kind of secret he holds.
Part of her was glad he told her, only to know he trusted her, she guessed.
But that doesnāt change the hurt that was given off.
Her heart was still shattered and he still felt very much ashamed.
And thatās the way it will probably remain, until they can both just forget about it.
Is that possible?
No answer can be given at this time, considering it was a recent event.
Will she be able to forget this other that beholds his heart instead of her?
Doubtful.
Only time will tell now.
Constantly climbing a hill, constantly coming across problems that my mind creates.
Can you love that?
Marks that have been left on my skin, the marks you witnessed, from past āloversā who decided to take my fragile state to their advantage.
The poisoning I did to my body, the drugs and alcohol exposure.
My little sister trying to commit suicide, the blame, the problems that arose from it.
Itās all my fault, donāt you know that?
I donāt like to make excuses butā¦ it has done things to me. Things you cannot possibly understand by the simple fact you never had to go through that.
Can you love that?
Despite my past?
Despite anything?
Thatās what a love, a marriage, a life is all about anyway, right?
I still love you, despite anything you have ever told me.
I look to the better of you, the positive, the things that make you, you.
I love you!
Can you love me?
Love me, pick me, choose me.
I want to be your one and only.
I want you to be my last and only.
Please.
obvious
This continues and thereās no reason for it.
Have you not let go? Proof is there, you havenāt.
Itās been made very clear that you are not important, not anymore.
One point, you were my best friend, but it changed when you became less than that.
It wasnāt the feelings that were changing, it was you.
The word useless was just used out of anger, hopefully that is known.
Yet any other word that would be used to describe you isnāt much better than useless.
Did it hurt you? Proof is there, it did.
That wasnāt the intention but at the same time, how else can anything get through your mind without a little aggression?
It canāt, thatās the point.
Hypocrite was also used, you say answers should be obvious, is it not here?
That answer is an obvious no considering you asked many times, how?
Answers could be given willingly if you were ever willing to listen.
Caring, something that you could never qualify for.
Certainly, it didnāt go both ways, but the question is when did you know it stopped?
Obvious answer, itās been a while.
The subject of care, was it asked of you? Nah.
Was it asked that you still do? Nah, but obviously you do since this is still ongoing.
Nothing is expected, the specific names used, they were used for a reason.
Cherishing memories, something performed often too.
Faded, they did because of the person you became for me.
They will stay in the back of the mind considering
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