The Amish Teacher's Dilemma and Healing Their Amish Hearts Patricia Davids (best self help books to read TXT) 📖

chattering away, feeling nervous with him standing so close. “It’s been wonderful working here. I’ve loved teaching Sam and the other children but I have to go now.”

“Becca! Listen to me. I love you! And I mean it. Please, don’t turn away from me.” His voice sounded a bit anxious, as if he were afraid.

She whirled on him, her feelings a riot of unease. Oh, how she longed to believe him. But what if he were lying to her?

“You don’t mean it. Not really,” she said.

“I do mean it. Every word. I’m not some silly boy, Becca. I know my own mind. I love you. Would you mind not returning to Ohio at all?” he asked.

She swallowed, thinking she’d misunderstood him again, yet knowing her hearing was fine. “I... I’m afraid that isn’t possible now. I heard you and Sam yesterday, out back by the horse barn. I know you two have reconciled and Sam is speaking again. That’s so wonderful. But my work is done here. I have to go.”

He showed a slight frown, his gaze never leaving hers. “Hmm. You heard my conversation with Sam? All of it?”

She nodded, feeling her face heating up. She didn’t like to confess that she had eavesdropped on them. “I’m so happy for you both. I know Sam loves and misses his mudder very much. So do you.”

And she was happy for them. So very happy that they’d reconciled. That they could be a loving father and son once more. But she didn’t believe that love included her.

“You didn’t listen to our entire conversation, did you?” he asked, watching her quietly.

“Ne, I thought it was too personal. Once I realized you had everything in control, I returned to the schoolhouse.” She wasn’t about to tell him that she’d cried too. That even without him telling her he loved her, her heart was breaking once more.

“Then you didn’t hear Sam tell me that he loves you too. Nor did you hear me explain to him that it’s time for us to move on with our lives and be happy again. Or that Sam wishes you could be his mudder now and I want you to be my wife,” he said.

She stared, too stunned to speak for several pounding moments.

“You...you told Sam that?”

He nodded. “I certainly did.”

“And Sam told you he loves me?”

Another nod. “He did.”

It was too much. Oh, how she wanted to believe him. But that would require her to take a leap of faith. To trust him.

“But Sam ran away when he saw you kissing me at the box social. And then again during the school program.” She felt shocked to the tips of her toes.

“Ja, he was still feeling guilty for the house fire. He didn’t think he had a right to love you and be happy again. I told him that’s not right. The fire wasn’t his fault at all. I told him I love you too. I want us to be a familye.” Jesse made the admission slowly, thoughtfully, as if he really meant it.

“I... I don’t understand. Why would you say all those things?” She couldn’t believe it. This was a joke. He was teasing her. Wasn’t he?

“Because it’s true. I love you, Becca. Please don’t go. Don’t break my heart. I want you to stay.”

Don’t break his heart? All this time, she’d been fearing he might hurt her, not the other way around. His plea made her want to love and keep him safe. To protect and cherish him the way she longed to be loved and treasured.

“But...but you love your wife. You don’t love me. Not the way you loved your wife,” she cried.

“My love for Alice was filled with a deep concern for her welfare, appreciation, respect and passion. That’s exactly how I feel about you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I’ve fought my feelings for a long time but I can’t fight them anymore. I love you, Becca. And if you’ll have me, I’d like you to be my wife. I know it’s what Alice would want for me too.”

She gave a shuddering laugh of incredulity. This was happening so fast and she was having difficulty wrapping her mind around what he was saying. “Are you sure Sam feels this way too?”

“Ja, he loves you for being there for him. For helping us during a critical time in our lives. For never giving up on us.”

She jerked when Jesse lifted his head and called to his son.

“Sam! Would you come in here, please?”

As if in a dream, Becca watched as Sam appeared in the doorway, holding his little straw hat in his hands. Like his father, he was wearing his Sunday best, his cheeks gleaming pink from a good scrubbing. It touched her deeply that the two of them had bathed and dressed in their finest clothes just to pay her a visit and...

They were proposing marriage to her! It finally sank in to her muddled brain. They were really here, standing in front of her, asking her to marry them. Jesse wasn’t lying to her. He was speaking the truth.

“Teacher Becca, danke for everything you’ve done for me and Daed.” The boy spoke in a soft voice but it carried clear across the room. Not a whisper. No, not at all.

Hearing Sam talk out loud like this was almost more than Becca could take in. She went to him and knelt down.

“Oh, Sam! You’re speaking again. It’s so wundervoll.” Before she could think to stop herself, she pulled him into her arms for a tight hug. Her emotions almost overwhelmed her and she realized tears ran down her cheeks.

Finally, she released the boy and he stepped back, smiling wide. She stood and faced Jesse, her thoughts zipping around in her head like fireflies.

“I can’t believe all of this is true,” she said.

“Believe it, Becca. It’s all true.” Jesse took Sam’s hand and the two gazed at her with such adoration, so much expectation and love, that