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a tent, I never felt poor. I had the arrogance of the wealth of nature around me. I never felt poor because I was drunk with the possibilities of my life and never noticed what I did not have.

As you set forth in life, I want to tell you that self-assurance and self-reliance are the most important things, especially for a woman. Believe in yourself and in the ability to stand up for what you feel is right. Don’t be apologetic for standing up for the values you believe in. Don’t follow the herd mentality; instead, visualize clearly what you want and ever so often, the light will shine through to you and make it clear to you what is the right thing you should be doing. Don’t conform to the norm just because everybody is doing or saying the same thing. A firm resolve to follow your heart’s unshakeable belief is an essential tool for a good life. You have only look at Sita, Rani Laxmibai, Chennama, Florence Nightingale—all those who had an overreaching allegiance to their own belief that ultimately led them on their paths.

You should be creative in life. By this I don’t mean you have to go out of your way and do the impossible. Only once in a lifetime can one do some path-breaking things like the creation of the telephone or the light bulb. By creativity, I mean doing things by applying your mind to the way you lead your everyday life. Be passionate about things other than your work. Learn and enjoy music, books, environmental protection, contribute to preserving and enjoying nature.Go on a trek, stand and stare, go river rafting, cultivate things that give you joy in your everyday life.

Be spiritual not in the ritualistic manner but in the way you lead your life—celebrate and have wonderment about the way things have come together on such a grand scale in this world. Reflect every day and discover the meaning of life on your own. That is a journey in itself.

I am often asked if I believe in destiny. I am not sure about destiny and what is ordained for you. Our lives pan out depending on where we are born, how we are raised, and under what circumstances. If I had been born in Pakoccupied Kashmir and raised there, my life would probably be different and so would it be if I was born in a poor family in a backward caste in India. The debate between nature and nurture will continue but what I know is that sometimes the cards that you have dealt with is ordained but how you deal them is in your hands. I agree that destiny has a huge role to play in our lives, but what you make out of your circumstances is a lot in your control.

I was born in a family of less than modest means but have a lot today at my disposal, much more than I or my parents could ever have imagined for me. And while I don’t want to lecture you about anything, don’t be guilty about spending the wealth you have because I believe if everyone was to be simple, there will be no economic activity. Personally, I try to be as simple as possible. Simplicity makes happiness more possible than complexity, I think.

I still farm whenever I get time. At one time I was the largest silkworm producer in the country, grew coconuts and areca nuts. I miss that life and I plan to go back to it in sometime.

In the end, I want to tell you that a successful life is achieved being happy doing whatever you want in a way that enhances the happiness of others and yourself. If all hurdles have to be overcome, we will never get ahead in life. We have to just go ahead, take the plunge, and trust that the future will take care of itself.

Now, go ahead and live your dreams to the fullest.

Yours with love,

Papa

Chanda Kochhar

othing in the initial years of Chanda Kochhar’s life, growing up as one among a college professor’s three children in the desert city of Jaipur, ever suggested she would one day make it to Forbes ‘100 Most Powerful Women in the World’ list four times in a row.

Destiny kicked in when her 51-year-old father passed away unexpectedly, leaving all three children in the sole care of their mother who had, till then, led a sheltered existence. The resilient homemaker called on her inner strength and took a giant leap of faith, moving the family to Mumbai where she picked up a job and put her kids through college.

‘It was a very different life from the one we lived in Jaipur but she (mother) took up a job designing for a garment company, pulling on her inner strengths and making sure that step-by-step she put all 3 of us through college, got us married and set us up on our way.’

Chanda obtained a Masters’ degree in Management Studies before joining ICICI as a management trainee, steadily working her way up the corporate ladder. At 47, she became its first woman MD and CEO, and its youngest too. Today, she is the captain in charge of $100 billion of the bank’s assets and over 2,700 branches spread across 19 countries.

And yet, Chanda believes that each of us can write our own destiny, largely by following a value system based on the tenets of hard work and commitment. ‘Your destiny is what you make of it’, the slightly-built woman told me at her plush office at ICICI’s corporate headquarters in Mumbai last year.

It is hard to discount what she says because her career graph speaks volumes about the fact that she practices what she preaches. It was relentless hard work, along with the ability to continuously push her own boundaries, which ultimately worked to her advantage,

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