Rising Tomorrow (Roc de Chere Book 1) Mariana Morgan (most life changing books .txt) 📖

promotion, or those with already extensive resources could use their power to blackmail those beneath them.

Gonzalez wasn’t sure how that worked, but his historical studies had led him to believe that some of the old military organisations, from before the Great Collapse, banned relationships between uniformed personnel. It seemed unnatural but far simpler, and right now, Gonzalez longed to find himself somewhere with a very strict ban on all personal relationships.

‘Let me ask that question one more time. Why did you recommend him?’ The words came out harsh, and Ingram repressed the urge to flinch. Barely.

‘Because he is good in the field, and we will need that.’ She held her CO’s gaze firmly. ‘There aren’t many other people I would rather have watching my back than Federico, all past and present considered. He has a good, sharp instinct and excellent reflexes. And I know you wouldn’t have chosen him if you didn’t know all that already. He might be a bit of a bitter, disrespectful ass, horsing around between action, but it’s his way of unwinding and managing stress. We all have our own ways. I drive you bonkers with my jokes when I’m stressed!’

‘Not even remotely the same, Aisha. It’s his apparent lack of respect I have issues with, not the horsing around. He’s useless if there is even a hint of a possibility that he won’t respect your orders or mine because he thinks with his dick. Regardless of whether it’s in the field or in a briefing. If he puts such… adolescent distractions to the forefront of his thoughts, he’s a danger to us all.’

It didn’t take a genius to guess Gonzalez found the thought of Palmeiro accusing him of sleeping with Ingram highly objectionable. The thought that he might have expected sexual favours from any of his subordinates in exchange for a recommendation left a vile taste in his mouth. But he knew that it must feel even more offensive from Ingram’s perspective. After all, she had been forced to do some unspeakable things during her desperate years as a Leech.

‘Federico is a good operative,’ Ingram repeated, even more forcefully. ‘It will not happen again. I will have a word with him.’

‘No, I will.’ His icy glare told her Gonzalez intended to use something far stronger than words.

‘Sir, let me sort this out. I think for the time being that it’s better if he doesn’t know what I just told you. You can always rip his head off when we’re back. For now, please let me sort this out.’ Ingram wasn’t quite begging, but Gonzalez recognised a genuine plea when he heard one. She honestly believed Palmeiro deserved the chance, despite the way he had treated her during the briefing.

‘Fine, but if he acts like an asshole even one more time, I don’t care how good you think he is. He’s gone.’

‘Understood, sir.’ Ingram inclined her head and swiftly turned to leave. There was no better time than now to sort this out.

‘Aisha?’ Gonzalez stopped her just before she reached the door. ‘I know it’s possibly none of my business, but why did you reject his advances?’ It was true, now that he got to think about it, that he had never known her to indulge her sexual needs with other military personnel. Most people made that mistake at least once. He knew she liked hitting the town in those rare off-duty moments without any intention of making it back to her own bed for the night, so it clearly wasn’t because she was disinterested in carnal pleasures.

Ingram paused, facing away from Gonzalez, and allowed herself a moment to collect her thoughts. She found herself actually wishing Gonzalez knew the answer, but the prospect of telling him was grim. Ever since she had got that damn Leech BCC implanted, and especially since the days in the Underground City, she had found memories of her past invading her mind. It was starting to take its toll. Another trip down memory lane was suboptimal, to say the least.

‘I’ve tried to forget how many Elite officers and non-com Leech traitors have raped me since I enlisted,’ she began, ‘but it’s just not something I could ever lose count of. But there are those times when I can’t remember why it happened. Whether I was physically forced to do it, coerced, or whether I initiated it because I wanted something in return. I wonder how many times I “volunteered” because I knew it would make things easier. It’s hard to draw a line between what’s pure survival and that which simply makes life easier.

‘The lines blur, sir, and sometimes nothing make sense. I’ve seen fellow recruits, both men and women, go through exactly the same. I’ve seen them lose the luxury of knowing that their body should belong to them. The sexual abuse was just an extension of what they called training. And Q9 made it all blur into one never-ending nightmare. In a way, it was almost easier to hide behind the drug’s effects—you could lie to yourself that it wasn’t really you, that the nano-hells were making it happen—but the truth is, I’ve spread my legs to make my life easier too many times for my own peace of mind.

‘I don’t beat myself up over it too much these days. On a good day, I almost feel clever that I was able to use their own weapon against them to procure food or medicine, or some small act of leniency. I cherish those little moments of defiance and triumph.

‘But I did promise myself, when I accepted my transformation from Ortega to Toscano, that I would never spread my legs to get anything ever again. Work assignments excluded!’ she added quickly, seeing Gonzalez’s uneasy flinch. ‘Work assignments excluded,’ she repeated, more evenly. ‘I mean, I wouldn’t offer myself to anyone, man or woman, for my own goals. Professionally, as a part of my job, I accept it can sometimes be a valid method to gather intel. But personally, I