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thereafter, it wouldn’tmatter how badly my back was torn up.

But it felt like cheating.

When I finally stepped onto theplatform I had already decided to take the punishment as it wasintended. My only concession was allowing Elise Thornbear to treatmy back with an ointment meant to numb the skin. Hopefully, itwould dull the pain to a level that would keep me from embarrassingmyself.

The man who greeted me on the platformwas masked, much like an executioner. As far as I knew, that mightbe his other job, but it didn’t seem like the time to ask. Iwondered if the mask was to protect his identity from me, or fromthe crowd. I probably could have identified him later from hisaythar alone if I had been of a mind to be vindictive.

“Good day,” I greeted him. Old habitsdie hard.

He didn’t respond to my greeting,choosing instead to remain business-like. “If you’d put these onfor me, my lord,” he handed me a pair of manacles with a shortchain between them.

“I’m not planning to run,” Iexplained. “I would have already done so if that were myplan.”

“Those are more to keep you upright,my lord, after you pass out,” he answered in a dead panvoice.

“Does that happen a lot?”

“Yeah, if you’re lucky, it happenssooner, rather than later,” he told me.

Involuntarily my eyes were drawn tothe braided black coil of leather he had soaking in a bucketnearby. Clasping the irons around my wrists, I raised my hands toshow the crowd. My situation was humiliating enough, but I felt aneed to show my determination.

They remained silent, but every eyewas on me; some with pity, some gloating at the lord brought low,and most of the rest with simple interest. For them, perhaps I wasmerely a source of entertainment.

Penny had come, along with Rose andWalter, but we had excluded everyone else from Cameron, especiallythe children. Ariadne had invited them to stand with her, as akindness, but Penny’s anger hadn’t allowed for it. She blamed theQueen as much as the Justicer.

“Why do you soak the whip?” I asked ashe helped to loop the chain between my wrists over a hook mountedon a pole in the center of the platform.

“We soak it in brine, my lord, to helpminimize the bleeding. The physicians say that it keeps the woundsfrom getting the rot later too,” he volunteered. “Personallythough, I think they started doing it to make it hurtmore.”

I was beginning to sense a themeregarding that.

“Try not to tense up too much,” headded. “It cuts deeper if you’re stiff.”

And how many peopleactually retain that much self-control after this starts,I wondered. Now you’rejust saying things to make it worse.

I watched the crowd while listening tohim ready the whip, shaking off the excess liquid and letting ituncoil like an evil snake behind me. I made certain my eyes weren’ton Penny as I felt more than saw him draw his arm back for thefirst blow.

A line of burning white fire explodedthrough my consciousness, wiping my mind clear of every cleverthought I might have had. Somehow I had thought perhaps I would beable to clench my teeth and get through the experience withoutmaking a sound, but my body took matters into its own hands. Astrange yelping left my lips involuntarily, possibly because thewhip had struck when my lungs were only half full.

The animal side of my brain was infull panic now, and the sane rational portion of my mind wasvanishing quickly. My ears heard the slithering sound of theleather on wood, as he flicked his wrist to return it to thestarting position. It took every ounce of will I had to keep fromcreating a shield then and there.

The second blistering stroke took theair from my lungs. If there was a yell that accompanied it, Icouldn’t be sure. At that point, I was no longer worried aboutwhether I might make noise anyway. The fragment of my consciousnessthat was still faintly rational began to compare my current pain tothe pain I had experienced during my ordeal with Mal’goroth. It wasa bit like comparing apples to oranges, but its final conclusionwas that at least I had a well-defined end point for thispain.

Then again, that was thenand this is—Unhh!!

With the third lash, I had hadenough.

Unwilling to shield myself orotherwise give in, my mind did the only other thing it could, itescaped. Slipping into the half-state that I had learned yearsbefore as an archmage, my mind found shelter in the earth beneathme. It didn’t abandon my body completely, but my flesh and bloodself was now a much smaller part of my awareness.

In fact, the first time I had eversought mental sanctuary in the stone like that was right before Ihad fought Celior.

I watched the rest of the lashingalmost as an outside observer. My body still jerked, and spasmscaused it to twitch after each blow, but I no longer experiencedthe pain in the same way. It was impersonal, something more of anannoyance than an immediate threat to my well-being.

When it was finally over he put thewhip back in its bucket and moved to help unhook the chain from thepost. Resuming more direct control over my body, I straightened,and with only a thought I severed the iron chain so that I couldlower my arms.

“I thought you were unconscious,” theman told me, eyeing the ruined manacles. As an afterthought headded, “You’ll have to pay for those.”

I had been about to use my magic topop the clasps themselves open, but I had another thought. “That’sfine,” I told him. “I’ll keep them as a reminder.”

Ignoring the crowd, I began walking toPenny. Every movement was painful, and standing, much less walking,was an exercise in misery. I could feel the blood running down myback, but I refused the physician’s offer of assistance. Putting mymind partially back in the earth enabled me to reach her withoutstumbling.

They put my arms over their shoulders,which elicited a fresh surge of pain from my back, and then Waltermade us invisible. The three of us made our way home then, and Itried to forget the rest of the day. There was no good to be had init.

Chapter 54

The months

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