The Big Time Fritz Leiber (best romance novels of all time .txt) š
- Author: Fritz Leiber
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Thinking time wasnāt an item even on the strictly limited list at the moment, although Sevensee, squatting dourly on his hairy haunches where Maud had left him, threw in a deadpan āThas tellinā āem, Gov.ā
Then Doc at the bar stood up tall as Abe Lincoln in his top hat and shawl and 19th Century duds and raised an unwavering arm for silence and said something that sounded like: āIntroversh, inversh, glovsh,ā and then his enunciation switched to better than perfect as he continued, āI know to an absolute certainty what we must do.ā
It showed me how rabbity we were that the Place got quiet as a church while we all stopped whatever we were doing and waited breathless for a poor drunk to tell us how to save ourselves.
He said something like, āInvershā āā ā¦ boshā āā ā¦ā and held our eyes for a moment longer. Then the light went out of his and he slobbered out a āNichevoā and slid an arm far along the bar for a bottle and started to pour it down his throat without stopping sliding.
Before he completed his collapse to the floor, in the split second while our attention was still focused on the bar, Bruce vaulted up on top of it, so fast it was almost like heād popped up from nowhere, though Iād seen him start from behind the piano.
āIāve a question. Has anyone here triggered that bomb?ā he said in a voice that was very clear and just loud enough. āSo it canāt go off,ā he went on after just the right pause, his easy grin and brisk manner putting more heart into me all the time. āWhatās more, if it were to be triggered, weād still have half an hour. I believe you said it had that long a fuse?ā
He stabbed a finger at Kaby. She nodded.
āRight,ā he said. āItād have to be that long for whoever plants it in the Parthian camp to get away. Thereās another safety margin.
āSecond question. Is there a locksmith in the house?ā
For all Bruceās easiness, he was watching us like a golden eagle and he caught Beauās and Maudās affirmatives before they had a chance to explain or hedge them and said, āThatās very good. Under certain circumstances, you twoād be the ones to go to work on the chest. But before we consider that, thereās Question Three: Is anyone here an atomics technician?ā
That one took a little conversation to straighten out, Illy having to explain that, yes, the Early Lunans had atomic powerā āhadnāt they blasted the life off their planet with it and made all those ghastly craters?ā ābut no, he wasnāt a technician exactly, he was a āthingerā (I thought at first his squeakbox was lisping); what was a thinger?ā āwell, a thinger was someone who manipulated things in a way that was truly impossible to describe, but no, you couldnāt possibly thing atomics; the idea was quite ridiculous, so he couldnāt be an atomics thinger; the term was worse than a contradiction, well, really!ā āwhile Sevensee, from his two-thousand-millennia advantage of the Lunan, grunted to the effect that his culture didnāt rightly use any kind of power, but just sort of moved satyrs and stuff by wrastling space-time around, āor think āem rounā ef we hafta. Canāt think āem in the Void, tho, wus luck. Hafta haveā āI dunno wut. Dun havvit anyhow.ā
āSo we donāt have an A-tech,ā Bruce summed up, āwhich makes it worse than useless, downright dangerous, to tamper with the chest. We wouldnāt know what to do if we did get inside safely. One more question.ā He directed it toward Sid. āHow long before we can jettison anything?ā
Sid, looking a shade jealous, yet mostly grateful for the way Bruce had calmed his chickens, started to explain, but Bruce didnāt seem to be taking any chance of losing his audience, and as soon as Sid got to the word ārhythm,ā he pulled the answer away from him.
āIn brief, not until we can effectively tune in on the cosmos again. Thank you, Master Lessingham. Thatās at least five hoursā ātwo mealtimes, as the Cretan officer put it,ā and he threw Kaby a quick soldierly smile. āSo, whether the bomb goes to Egypt or elsewhere, thereās not a thing we can do about it for five hours. All right then!ā
His smile blinked out like a light and he took a couple of steps up and down the bar, as if measuring the space he had. Two or three cocktail glasses sailed off and popped, but he didnāt seem to notice them and we hardly did either. It was creepy the way he kept staring from one to another of us. We had to look up. Behind his face, with the straight golden hair flirting around it, was only the Void.
āAll right then,ā he repeated suddenly. āWeāre twelve Spiders and two Ghosts, and weāve time for a bit of a talk, and weāre all in the same bloody boat, fighting the same bloody war, so weāll all know what weāre talking about. I raised the subject a while back, but I was steamed up about a glove, and it was a big jest. All right! But now the gloves are off!ā
Bruce ripped them out of his belt where theyād been tucked and slammed them down on the bar, to be kicked off the next time he paced back and forth, and it wasnāt funny.
āBecause,ā he went right on, āIāve been getting a completely new picture of what this Spidersā war has been doing to each one of us. Oh, itās jolly good sport to slam around in space and time and then have a rugged little party outside both of them when
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