Clarissa Harlowe Samuel Richardson (most important books to read TXT) 📖

she, as fast as she could speak, with her arms spread abroad, and all her fingers distended, and held up, will you be pleased to walk down into your own parlour?⁠—There is everybody, I will assure you in full congregation!⁠—And there is Mr. Solmes, as fine as a lord, with a charming white peruke, fine laced shirt and ruffles, coat trimmed with silver, and a waistcoat standing on end with lace!⁠—Quite handsome, believe me!⁠—You never saw such an alteration!⁠—Ah! Miss, shaking her head, ’tis pity you have said so much against him! but you will know how to come off for all that!⁠—I hope it will not be too late!

Impertinence! said I⁠—Wert thou bid to come up in this fluttering way?⁠—and I took up my fan, and fanned myself.

Bless me! said she, how soon these fine young ladies will be put into flusterations!⁠—I mean not either to offend or frighten you, I am sure.⁠—

Everybody there, do you say?⁠—Who do you call everybody?

Why, Miss, holding out her left palm opened, and with a flourish, and a saucy leer, patting it with the fore finger of the other, at every mentioned person, there is your papa!⁠—there is your mamma!⁠—there is your uncle Harlowe!⁠—there is your uncle Antony!⁠—your aunt Hervey!⁠—my young lady!⁠—and my young master!⁠—and Mr. Solmes, with the air of a great courtier, standing up, because he named you:⁠—Mrs. Betty, said he, (then the ape of a wench bowed and scraped, as awkwardly as I suppose the person did whom she endeavoured to imitate), pray give my humble service to Miss, and tell her, I wait her commands.

Was not this a wicked wench?⁠—I trembled so, I could hardly stand. I was spiteful enough to say, that her young mistress, I supposed, bid her put on these airs, to frighten me out of a capacity of behaving so calmly as should procure me my uncles’ compassion.

What a way do you put yourself in, Miss, said the insolent!⁠—Come, dear Madam, taking up my fan, which I had laid down, and approaching me with it, fanning, shall I⁠—

None of thy impertinence!⁠—But say you, all my friends are below with him? And am I to appear before them all?

I can’t tell if they’ll stay when you come. I think they seemed to be moving when Mr. Solmes gave me his orders.⁠—But what answer shall I carry to the ’squire?

Say, I can’t go!⁠—but yet when ’tis over, ’tis over!⁠—Say, I’ll wait upon⁠—I’ll attend⁠—I’ll come presently⁠—say anything; I care not what⁠—but give me my fan, and fetch me a glass of water⁠—

She went, and I fanned myself all the time; for I was in a flame; and hemmed, and struggled with myself all I could; and, when she returned, drank my water; and finding no hope presently of a quieter heart, I sent her down, and followed her with precipitation; trembling so, that, had I not hurried, I question if I could have got down at all.⁠—Oh my dear, what a poor, passive machine is the body when the mind is disordered!

There are two doors to my parlour, as I used to call it. As I entered one, my friends hurried out the other. I just saw the gown of my sister, the last who slid away. My uncle Antony went out with them: but he stayed not long, as you shall hear; and they all remained in the next parlour, a wainscot partition only parting the two. I remember them both in one: but they were separated in favour of us girls, for each to receive her visitors in at her pleasure.

Mr. Solmes approached me as soon as I entered, cringing to the ground, a visible confusion in every feature of his face. After half a dozen choked-up Madams⁠—he was very sorry⁠—he was very much concerned⁠—it was his misfortune⁠—and there he stopped, being unable presently to complete a sentence.

This gave me a little more presence of mind. Cowardice in a foe begets courage in one’s self⁠—I see that plainly now⁠—yet perhaps, at bottom, the new-made bravo is a greater coward than the other.

I turned from him, and seated myself in one of the fireside chairs, fanning myself. I have since recollected, that I must have looked very saucily. Could I have had any thoughts of the man, I should have despised myself for it. But what can be said in the case of an aversion so perfectly sincere?

He hemmed five or six times, as I had done above; and these produced a sentence⁠—that I could not but see his confusion. This sentence produced two or three more. I believe my aunt had been his tutoress; for it was his awe, his reverence for so superlative a Lady (I assure you!) And he hoped⁠—he hoped⁠—three times he hoped, before he told me what⁠—at last it came out, that I was too generous (generosity, he said, was my character) to despise him for such⁠—for such⁠—for such⁠—true tokens of his love.

I do indeed see you under some confusion, Sir; and this gives me hope, that although I have been compelled, as I may call it, to give way to this interview, it may be attended with happier effects than I had apprehended from it.

He had hemmed himself into more courage.

You could not, Madam, imagine any creature so blind to your merits, and so little attracted by them, as easily to forego the interest and approbation he was honoured with by your worthy family, while he had any hope given him, that one day he might, by his perseverance and zeal, expect your favour.

I am but too much aware, Sir, that it is upon the interest and approbation you mention, that you build such hope. It is impossible otherwise, that a man, who has any regard for his own happiness, would persevere against such declarations as I have made, and think myself obliged to make, in justice to you, as well as to myself.

He had seen many instances, he told me, and had heard of more, where ladies had seemed as averse, and yet had been