Etiquette by Emily Post (top novels to read .txt) 📖
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etc. But the announcement of the marriage of a widow of maturer years is engraved on note paper and reads:
Mrs. Priscilla Barnes Leaming
and
Mr. Worthington Adams
have the honour to announce their marriage
on Monday the second of November
at Saratoga Springs
New York
Cards Of Address
If the bride and groom wish to inform their friends of their future address (especially in cities not covered by the Social Register), it is customary to enclose a card with the announcement:
Mr. and Mrs. Worthington Adams
will be at home
after the first of December
at Twenty-five Alderney Place
Or merely their visiting card with their new address in the lower right corner:
Mr. and Mrs. Worthington Adams
25 Alderney Place
Invitation To Wedding Anniversary
For a wedding anniversary celebration, the year of the wedding and the present year are usually stamped across the top of an invitation. Sometimes the couple's initials are added.
1898-1922
Mr. and Mrs. Alvin Johnson
request the pleasure of
Mr & Mrs. Norman's
company at the
Twenty-fifth Anniversary of their marriage
on Wednesday the first of June
at nine o'clock
Twenty-four Austin Avenue
R.s.v.p.
Answering A Wedding Invitation
An invitation to the church only requires no answer whatever. An invitation to the reception or breakfast is answered on the first page of a sheet of note paper, and although it is written "by hand" the spacing of the words must be followed as though they were engraved. This is the form of acceptance:
Mr. and Mrs. Robert Gilding, Jr.,
accept with pleasure
Mr. and Mrs. John Huntington Smith's
kind invitation for
Tuesday the first of June
The regret reads:
Mr. and Mrs. Richard Brown
regret that they are unable to accept
Mr. and Mrs. John Huntington Smith's
kind invitation for
Tuesday the first of June
Other Formal Invitations
All other formal invitations are engraved (never printed) on cards of thin white matte Bristol board, either plain or plate-marked like those for wedding reception cards. Note paper such as that used for wedding invitations is occasionally, but rarely, preferred.
Monograms, addresses, personal devices are not used on engraved invitations.
The size of the card of invitation varies with personal preference from four and a half to six inches in width, and from three to four and a half inches in height. The most graceful proportion is three units in height to four in width.
The lettering is a matter of personal choice, but the plainer the design, the better. Scrolls and ornate trimmings are bad taste always. Punctuation is used only after each letter of the R.s.v.p. and it is absolutely correct to use small letters for the s.v.p. Capitals R.S.V.P. are permissible; but fastidious people prefer "R.s.v.p."
Invitation To A Ball
The word "ball" is never used excepting in an invitation to a public one, or at least a semi-public one, such as may be given by a committee for a charity or a club, or association of some sort.
For example:
The Committee of the Greenwood Club
request the pleasure of your company
at a Ball
to be held in the Greenwood Clubhouse
on the evening of November the seventh
at ten o'clock.
for the benefit of
The Neighborhood Hospital
Tickets five dollars
Invitations to a private ball, no matter whether the ball is to be given in a private house, or whether the hostess has engaged an entire floor of the biggest hotel in the world, announce merely that Mr. and Mrs. Somebody will be "At Home," and the word "dancing" is added almost as though it were an afterthought in the lower left corner, the words "At Home" being slightly larger than those of the rest of the invitation. When both "At" and "Home" are written with a capital letter, this is the most punctilious and formal invitation that it is possible to send. It is engraved in script usually, on a card of white Bristol board about five and a half inches wide and three and three-quarters of an inch high. Like the wedding invitation it has an embossed crest without color, or nothing.
The precise form is:
Mr. and Mrs. Titherington de Puyster
At Home
On Monday the third of January
at ten o'clock
One East Fiftieth Street
The favour of an answer
is requested Dancing
or
Mr. and Mrs. Davis Jefferson
At Home
On Monday the third of January
at ten o'clock
Town and Country Club
Kindly send reply to
Three Mt. Vernon Square Dancing
(If preferred, the above invitations may be engraved in block or shaded block type.)
Ball For Débutante Daughter
Very occasionally an invitation is worded
Mr. and Mrs. Davis Jefferson
Miss Alice Jefferson
At Home
if the daughter is a débutante and the ball is for her, but it is not strictly correct to have any names but those of the host and his wife above the words "At Home."
The proper form of invitation when the ball is to be given for a débutante, is as follows:
Mr. and Mrs. de Puyster
request the pleasure of
Miss Rosalie Gray's
company at a dance in honour of their daughter
Miss Alice de Puyster
on Monday evening, the third of January
at ten o'clock
One East Fiftieth Street
R.s.v.p.
or
Mr. and Mrs. Titherington de Puyster
Miss Alice de Puyster
request the pleasure of
Mr. and Mrs. Greatlake's
company on Monday evening the third of January
at ten O'Clock
One East Fiftieth Street
Dancing
R.s.v.p.
The form most often used by fashionable hostesses in New York and Newport is:
Mr. and Mrs. Gilding
request the pleasure of
company at a small dance
on Monday the first of January
at Ought Ought Fifth Avenue
Even if given for a débutante daughter, her name does not appear, and it is called a "small dance," whether it is really small or big. The request for a reply is often omitted, since everyone is supposed to know that an answer is necessary. But if the dance, or dinner, or whatever the entertainment is to be, is given at one address and the hostess lives at another, both addresses are always given:
Mr. and Mrs. Sidney Oldname
request the pleasure of
company at a dance
on Monday evening the sixth of January
at ten o'clock
The Fitz-Cherry
Kindly send response to
Brookmeadows
L.I.
If the dance is given for a young friend who is not a relative, Mr. and Mrs. Oldname's invitations should
request the pleasure of
company at a dance in honour of
Miss Rosalie Grey
When And How One May Ask For An Invitation For A Stranger
One may never ask for an invitation for oneself anywhere! And one may not ask for an invitation to a luncheon or a dinner for a stranger. But an invitation for any general entertainment may be asked for a stranger—especially for a house-guest.
Example:
Dear Mrs. Worldly,
A young cousin of mine, David Blakely from Chicago, is staying with us.
May Pauline take him to your dance on Friday? If it will be inconvenient for you to include him, please do not hesitate to say so frankly.
Very sincerely yours,
Caroline Robinson Town.
Answer:
Dear Mrs. Town,
I shall be delighted to have Pauline bring Mr. Blakely on the tenth.
Sincerely yours,
Edith Worldly.
Or
A man might write for an invitation for a friend. But a very young girl should not ask for an invitation for a man—or anyone—since it is more fitting that her mother ask for her. An older girl might say to Mrs. Worldly, "My cousin is staying with us, may I bring him to your dance?" Or if she knows Mrs. Worldly very well she might send a message by telephone: "Miss Town would like to know whether she may bring her cousin, Mr. Michigan, to Mrs. Worldly's dance."
Card Of General Invitation
Invitations to important entertainments are nearly always especially engraved, so that nothing is written except the name of the person invited; but, for the hostess who entertains constantly, a card which is engraved in blank, so that it may serve for dinner, luncheon, dance, garden party, musical, or whatever she may care to give, is indispensable.
The spacing of the model shown below, the proportion of the words, and the size of the card, are especially good.
The Dinner Invitation
The blank which may be used only for dinner:
Mr. and Mrs. Huntington Jones
request the pleasure of
company at dinner
on
at eight o'clock
at Two Thousand Fifth Avenue
(For type and spacing follow model on p. 118.)
Invitations To Receptions And Teas
Invitations to receptions and teas differ from invitations to balls in that the cards on which they are engraved are usually somewhat smaller, the words "At Home" with capital letters are changed to "will be at home" with small letters, and the time is not set at the hour. Also, except on very unusual occasions, a man's name does not appear. The name of the débutante for whom the tea is given is put under that of her mother, and sometimes under that of her sister or the bride of her brother.
Mrs. James Town
Mrs. James Town, junior
Miss Pauline Town
will be at home
On Tuesday the eighth of December
from four until six o'clock
Two Thousand Fifth Avenue.
Mr. Town's name would probably appear with that of his wife if he were an artist, and the reception was given in his studio to view his pictures, or if a reception were given to meet a distinguished guest such as a bishop or a governor, in which case "In honour of the Right Reverend William Powell," or "To meet His Excellency the Governor," is at the top of the invitation.
The Formal Invitation Which Is Written
When the formal invitation to dinner or lunch is written instead of engraved, note paper stamped with house or personal device is used. The wording and spacing must follow the engraved models exactly.
It must not be written:
The foregoing example has four faults:
(1) Letters in the third person must follow the prescribed form. This does not. (2) The writing is crowded against the margin. (3) The telephone number should be used only for business and informal notes and letters. (4) The full name John should be used instead of the initial "J." "Mr. and Mrs." is better form than "Mr. & Mrs."
Recalling An Invitation
If for illness or other reason invitations have to be recalled the following forms are correct. They are always printed instead of engraved, there being no time for engraving.
Owing to sudden illness
Mr. and Mrs. John Huntington Smith
are obliged to recall their invitations
for Tuesday the tenth of June.
The form used when the invitation is postponed:
Mr. and Mrs. John Huntington Smith
regret exceedingly
that owing to the illness of Mrs. Smith
their dance is temporarily postponed.
When a wedding is broken off after the invitations have been issued:
Mr. and Mrs. Benjamin Nottingham
announce
that the marriage of their daughter
Mary Katharine
and
Mr. Jerrold Atherton
will not take place
Formal Acceptance Or Regret
Acceptances or regrets are always written. An engraved form to be filled in is vulgar—nothing could be in worse taste than to flaunt your popularity by announcing that it is impossible to answer your numerous invitations without the time-saving device of a printed blank. If you have a dozen or more invitations a day, if you have a hundred, hire a staff
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