Captain Jinks, Hero Ernest Howard Crosby (best management books of all time TXT) đ
- Author: Ernest Howard Crosby
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âHereâs my friend, Captain Jinks,â said a husky voice which Sam recognized as that of old Reddy. âHere, take this chair near the fire.â
Sam accepted the offered chair, although he would have preferred a situation a little less torrid.
âGentlemen, this is Captain Jinks,â said the old man, determined to get all the credit he could from his acquaintance with Sam. âCaptain, this is my friend, Mr. Jackson.â
Mr. Jackson was a tall, thin, narrow-chested man with no shoulders, a rounded back, and a gray, tobacco-stained mustache. His face was covered with pimples, and a huge quid of tobacco was concealed under his cheek. He was sitting on a chair tipped back rather beyond the danger-point, and his feet rested on the rim which projected from the stove halfway up. He made no effort to rise, but slowly extended a grimy, clammy hand which Sam pressed with some hesitation.
âGlad to make your acquaintance, Captain,â he drawled in a half-cracked voice that suggested damaged lungs and vocal organs. âShake hands with Mr. Tucker.â
Mr. Tucker, a little, old, red-faced man on the other side of the stove, advanced and went through the ceremony suggested.
âWe were just a-talking about them Cubapinos,â explained Reddy. âThe idee of them fellers a-pitching into us after all weâve done for âem. Itâs outrageous. Theyâre only monkeys anyway, and they ought to be shot, every motherâs son on âem. Havenât we freed âem from the cruel Castalians that theyâve been hating so for three hundred years?â
âThey seem to be hating us pretty well just now,â said a man in the corner, whose voice sounded familiar to Sam. He turned and recognized the commercial traveler of the day before.
âTheyâre welcome to hate us,â answered Jackson, âand when it comes to a matter of hating I shouldnât think much of us if we couldnât make âem hate us as much in a year as the Castalians could in three hundred. Theyâre a blamed slow lot and we ainât. Thatâs all there is of it. What do you think, Captain?â
âI fear,â said Sam, âthat they donât quite understand the great blessings weâre conferring on them.â
âWhat blessings?â asked the drummer.
âWhy,â said Sam, âliberty and independenceâ âno, I donât mean independence exactly, but liberty and freedom.â
âThen why donât we leave them alone instead of fighting them?â
âWhat an idee!â exclaimed Tucker. âThey donât know what liberty is, and we must teach âem if we have to blow their brains out.â
âYouâre too hard on âem, Tucker,â drawled Mr. Jackson. âWe mustnât expect too much from pore savages who live in a country so hot that they canât progress like we do.â Here Mr. Jackson took off his hat and wiped the beads of perspiration from his brow with a red bandanna handkerchief. âDonât expect too much from cannibals that have their brains half roasted by the tropical sun.â
âThatâs a fact!â said someone in the throng.
âYes,â said Jackson, crossing his legs on a level well above his head, âthem pore critters need our civilization, thatâs what they need,â and he dexterously squirted a mouthful of tobacco juice on the white-hot stove, where it sizzled and gradually evaporated. âWe must make real men of âem. We must give âem our strength and vigor and intelligence. Theyâre a dirty lot of lazy beggars, thatâs the long and short of it, and we must turn âem into gentlemen like us!â
A general murmur of approval followed this outburst.
âI hear,â said Sam, anxious to get some definite information as to the warriors of the town, âI hear that several Slowburghers are going to the war.â
âYes,â said Tucker, while Jackson after his effort settled down into a semi-comatose state, âsix of our boys are a-going. Thereâs Davy Black, he drives the fastest horse in these parts, and Tom Slade. Where is Tom? Heâs generally here. Theyâll miss him here at the hotel, and Jim Thomson who used to be bartender over at Bloodgoodâs, and the two Thatchersâ âtheyâre cousinsâ âthat makes five.â
âThe village ought to be glad they are going to represent her at the front,â said Sam.
âFrom all I can hear,â said the commercial man, âI think they are.â
âNaturally,â cried Sam, âit will reflect great glory on the place. You ought to be proud of them.â
âItâll help the insurance business here,â said a young man who had not yet spoken.
âHow is that?â asked Sam. âI donât exactly see.â
âWell, itâs this way. You see Iâm in the insurance business and I canât write a policy on a barn in this township, thereâs been so many burned; and while I donât want to say nothing against anybody, we think maybe they wonât burn so much when the Thatchers clear out.â
âNothinâ ainât ever been proved against âem,â said Tucker.
âThatâs true,â said the young man, âbut perhaps there might have been if theyâd stayed. They say that Squire Jones was going to have Josh Thatcher arrested next week for his barn, but heâs agreed to let
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