The Way We Live Now Anthony Trollope (classic books for 11 year olds .txt) š
- Author: Anthony Trollope
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Hetta was standing alone in a corner, near to her mother, who was talking to Mr. Booker, with her eyes fixed on the awful tranquillity of the Emperorās countenance, when Marie Melmotte timidly crept up to her and asked her how she was. Hetta, probably, was not very cordial to the poor girl, being afraid of her, partly as the daughter of the great Melmotte and partly as the girl with whom her brother had failed to run away; but Marie was not rebuked by this. āI hope you wonāt be angry with me for speaking to you.ā Hetta smiled more graciously. She could not be angry with the girl for speaking to her, feeling that she was there as the guest of the girlās mother. āI suppose you know about your brother,ā said Marie, whispering with her eyes turned to the ground.
āI have heard about it,ā said Hetta. āHe never told me himself.ā
āOh, I do so wish that I knew the truth. I know nothing. Of course, Miss Carbury, I love him. I do love him so dearly! I hope you donāt think I would have done it if I hadnāt loved him better than anybody in the world. Donāt you think that if a girl loves a manā āreally loves himā āthat ought to go before everything?ā
This was a question that Hetta was hardly prepared to answer. She felt quite certain that under no circumstances would she run away with a man. āI donāt quite know. It is so hard to say,ā she replied.
āI do. Whatās the good of anything if youāre to be brokenhearted? I donāt care what they say of me, or what they do to me, if he would only be true to me. Why doesnāt heā ālet me knowā āsomething about it?ā This also was a question difficult to be answered. Since that horrid morning on which Sir Felix had stumbled home drunkā āwhich was now four days sinceā āhe had not left the house in Welbeck Street till this evening. He had gone out a few minutes before Lady Carbury had started, but up to that time he had almost kept his bed. He would not get up till dinnertime, would come down after some half-dressed fashion, and then get back to his bedroom, where he would smoke and drink brandy-and-water and complain of headache. The theory was that he was ill;ā ābut he was in fact utterly cowed and did not dare to show himself at his usual haunts. He was aware that he had quarrelled at the club, aware that all the world knew of his intended journey to Liverpool, aware that he had tumbled about the streets intoxicated. He had not dared to show himself, and the feeling had grown upon him from day to day. Now, fairly worn out by his confinement, he had crept out intending, if possible, to find consolation with Ruby Ruggles. āDo tell me. Where is he?ā pleaded Marie.
āHe has not been very well lately.ā
āIs he ill? Oh, Miss Carbury, do tell me. You can understand what it is to love him as I do;ā ācanāt you?ā
āHe has been ill. I think he is better now.ā
āWhy does he not come to me, or send to me; or let me know something? It is cruel, is it not? Tell meā āyou must knowā ādoes he really care for me?ā
Hetta was exceedingly perplexed. The real feeling betrayed by the girl recommended her. Hetta could not but sympathize with the affection manifested for her own brother, though she could hardly understand the want of reticence displayed by Marie in thus speaking of her love to one who was almost a stranger. āFelix hardly ever talks about himself to me,ā she said.
āIf he doesnāt care for me, there shall be an end of it,ā Marie said very gravely. āIf I only knew! If I thought that he loved me, Iād go throughā āohā āall the world for him. Nothing that papa could say should stop me. Thatās my feeling about it. I have never talked to anyone but you about it. Isnāt that strange? I havenāt a person to talk to. Thatās my feeling, and Iām not a bit ashamed of it. Thereās no disgrace in being in love. But itās very bad to get married without being in love. Thatās what I think.ā
āIt is bad,ā said Hetta, thinking of Roger Carbury.
āBut if Felix doesnāt care for me!ā continued Marie, sinking her voice to a low whisper, but still making her words quite audible to her companion. Now Hetta was strongly of opinion that her brother did not in the least ācare forā Marie Melmotte, and that it would be very much for the
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