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door without another word.

I want to chase him down and beg him to forgive me, but I know it won’t do any good. He’s angry and hurt, and he’s right — it’s all my fault.

It was my idea to have the kids come to my place for the playdate. I was responsible for keeping them safe. Now, Phillip doesn’t think he’ll be able to see them again. He’s heartbroken, like any good father would be. And now that I may have lost him, my heart is breaking right along with his.

Chapter Twenty-Two

Fiasco

I walk into the pool hall and go right behind the bar to pour a shot of Captain Morgan and throw it back with the bottle still in my hand. That little bit of rum doesn’t even begin to help ease the ache inside of my chest, so I just go right to the source, pouring the amber liquid straight down my throat. I guzzle it as I make my way around the bar to climb up on one of the stools.

I’m halfway through the bottle when Nash and Malcolm come up on either side of me.

“Go easy,” Malcolm says.

“You okay, man?” Nash asks, and I shake my head.

The bottle eventually runs dry, which pisses me off even more. Before I even think about it, the glass is flying over the bar and shattering against the wall.

“Jesus,” someone says.

I cross my arms on the bar counter to bury my face in them.

“Get the women out of here!” Malcolm says.

“Fiasco, man. What happened?” Devlin asks, clasping his hand on my shoulder. The attempt at comforting me pisses me off, because I don’t want to cry like a pussy again. Anger is better. I roll my shoulders to shrug him off and get to my feet, stumbling a little as I come off the stool because the alcohol finally is starting to take effect. Good, I want to drink until I pass out and can’t think. To do that, I probably need another bottle.

The first face I see when the room stops spinning is Nash’s, reminding me of his beautiful sister. “This is your fucking fault!” I say while poking him in the chest with my finger hard enough that he moves backward.

“My fault?” he asks, brown eyes like hers widening in surprise. “What the hell did I do?”

“I wish I had died rather than met your sister!”

His face falls and he says, “Fiasco, man, you don’t really mean that.”

“The hell I don’t!” I yell in his face. “And my name is Phillip! Now get the fuck out of my way before I knock your ass out!”

“You’re not going to knock anyone out,” Malcolm grumbles from behind me.

Hands grab me from the side and behind to jerk me down so that I’m sitting on a stool again. “Sit down and tell us what happened,” Silas says.

“What happened? What happened is that I was a stupid fucking fool for thinking Joanna knew a goddamn thing about me. She was wrong. Now, I probably won’t ever see my kids again!”

“Something happened with your kids?” Devlin asks. Of all the guys, he knows me best since we work together and talk every day.

“Yes,” I answer with a loud belch following not so far behind. “I hit a dog on my bike and nearly killed it. Then Joanna paid a shit ton of money to save the dog. Wouldn’t you fucking know, the dog I nearly killed just bit Asher! Screw it. Keep calling me Fiasco. I don’t deserve any other name. I fuck up everything I touch.”

“Damn, man,” someone says.

“Did you get into an argument with Joanna?” Devlin asks.

“We’re done. I lost my kids and my girlfriend in one night.”

“Girlfriend?” Nash asks. “You’re serious about Joanna?”

“It’s done and over now, so no need to get pissed at me!”

“I knew you were seeing her, but I didn’t tell you to stop, did I?” Nash asks.

“Not to my face, no. I wouldn’t have even if you had told me to.”

“I don’t care if you date Joanna. She may be my biological sister, but I don’t get to have a say in her life. I didn’t want her to get caught up in any of the MC’s shit, but otherwise I’m not going to try and tell her or you who you can or can’t see.”

“Didn’t you hear me?” I ask his now two identical heads that look like Joanna. “It’s done. I can fuck whoever I want and make more kids.”

“You don’t mean that,” Malcolm says. “And even if you do mean it right now, you’ll hate yourself if you screw anyone else.”

“I already hate myself,” I mutter. “I need more rum.” I try to get to my feet, but hands push me down so hard I nearly fall off the stool.

“No more alcohol. We’re not going to stand around and watch you drink yourself to death,” Devlin says.

“Let’s get him up to the apartment upstairs. There’s still a bed. He can crash there tonight and sleep this shit off,” Malcolm says.

Sleep sounds like a great idea, as long as it’s a dreamless one. I don’t want happy dreams like ones where I’m with Joanna and she becomes a stepmother to Asher and Sierra. Nope. It’ll only make me sad, and I don’t think I can handle any more sadness.

Joanna

“I’m so sorry, buddy,” I say to Ace as I lie on the floor of my bedroom with him, tears streaming down my face. “It wasn’t your fault. It was mine. Phillip was right. I shouldn’t have pushed him.”

Ace lays his snout on my arm as if trying to comfort me.

“You’re a good, sweet dog,” I tell him, not planning to move for the rest of the night. I’ll just sleep on the floor, like a mutt. I don’t deserve to be comfortable, not after all the pain I’ve caused Phillip.

A sudden loud knock sounds at the door, and I scramble to my feet, hoping it’s Phillip.

I rush to the living room. And

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