Love Croakies Sam Cheever (red queen ebook txt) 📖

in stupid frilly hearts. She handed it to Archie. “Here, go into the bathroom and put this on.”

I watched in awe as Archie did as he was told. Sebille jerked her chin toward the sales counter. “Grab him some pens and a bunch of those Hearts of Bomb bookmarks we had printed.”

I did as I was told too. It was better than standing helpless and alarmed as my business took a nosedive before my very eyes.

By the time I’d gathered up the stuff she’d told me to get, Sebille was filling the empty cookie tray with a fresh display of heart cookies. Lea wandered over and took one. “Can I have some of this punch?”

“Punch?” I asked, my eyes bulging.

“Sure,” Sebille said. “Would you pour for the customers too?”

“You got it,” Lea said.

“Where’d you get all this?” I asked, flabbergasted.

“My secret,” Sebille said. She lowered her head to hide her grin, but I spotted it. She and I were going to have a talk later.

Archie emerged from the bathroom in the Valentine’s Day decorated robes and headed toward the table where he’d be signing books. I dropped the pens and bookmarks on the table.

The dividing door slammed open again, and I expected Hobs to barge back in. It wasn’t him. My cat sauntered into the store, wearing a tiny pink vest covered in hearts and roses. He was also wearing a red bow tie.

Movement at the edge of my vision had me turning in time to see Sebille jerking the blanket off the top of Mr. Slimy’s terrarium. She reached down behind the table holding his glassy home and grabbed a large piece of white cardboard with the words, “Kiss a Frog. Meet Your Prince.” written in tidy block letters.

I glanced in horror at the pudgy green squish. He was staring at me with his bulgy black eyes, his throat working in agitation. Slimy had the kissy lips again.

I’m going to give her so many warts when this is over! sayeth the frog.

I gasped. “Sebille!”

She blew me off with a raspberry and went back to the tea counter, where she grabbed a large bag of chalky candy hearts that said stupid things on them like, “Be my Valentine”. Or, “Pucker up, there’s a frog in your near future”. Okay, maybe that last one was mine, but you get the idea.

“Has the world gone totally mad?” I asked no one in particular.

“Meow!” Wicked said before brushing up against my calf.

Sebille hurried to the front door and turned to me. “Ready?”

I wanted to scream No! and stamp my feet. But I sighed. “Where do you want me?” And more importantly, when had I completely lost control?

“Behind the counter. We’re gonna sell some books!”

15

Ding Dong, the Witch is Decidedly Less Dead Than We’d Hoped

Osvald’s ruddy face was angry, the thick veins on his neck bulging with pique. “Have you lost your mind, man?”

Archie looked completely at ease in the old wooden chair at Shakespeare’s desk. His smile was slightly condescending, which I didn’t think was going to go over well with the irate…er…head. “Don’t throw a wobbly, Morty…”

I snorted. Morty.

“We need your expertise,” Archie told him with a frown. “You’re the only person who’s survived navigating one of these things. Your practical knowledge is invaluable.”

A dark, bushy brow lowered over a menacing black eye. “Yes, and it worked out so well for me, didn’t it?”

Archie shrugged as if the loss of a body was a trivial issue. “You had a spot of bad luck.”

Osvald’s dark, scraggly head tipped backward on a bark of laughter. “Yes. You could call it that.”

Archie’s manner softened. He leaned forward. “Look, Morty, this is important. I wouldn’t ask you if it weren’t.”

Archie’s change in manner seemed to reach Osvald where his previous arrogance hadn’t. “How far would we need to travel?”

Archie grinned, clapping his hands and rubbing them together. “A mere mile or two. Hardly long enough to matter.”

When Osvald didn’t immediately refuse, Archie’s face lit with excitement. “Brilliant! This will be one for the books.” Judging by his wide grin, I was starting to worry he was more interested in piloting an anomaly through The Enchanted Forest for the scientific chops it would give him, rather than to help me.

But, if it got us out of dealing with those wraiths, I was all for it. I’d just try not to focus on the whole, losing my body thing.

Ogre boogers!

The bell on the front door jangled, and I jumped. Sebille had already locked up and set the ward. I touched Archie on the shoulder and mouthed, “I’m going to see who’s here.”

He nodded and turned back to Osvald. The two of them were lost in plotting our adventure through The Enchanted Forest.

I opened the dividing door and stepped through, looking at the door. If I squinted, I could still see the glow of the special ward we used to keep magical trouble out. The regular deadbolt was still in place too.

Despite the jangle, the door didn’t appear to have been opened.

Hm.

The store was empty and quiet.

I caught movement out of the corner of my eye and swung around.

There was nothing there.

Ice formed on my spine as I pulled Keeper magic into my hands. It flared silver and bright, spitting into the silence of the store. My magic might be defensively limited beyond Croakies’ walls, but it was a force to be reckoned with inside them. “Whoever’s here, show yourself.”

The atmosphere thickened and swirled in creams and browns near the door and something twirled away, leaving a high-pitched giggle in its wake.

I frowned. “I said, show yourself!” Putting magic into my voice to lock the intruder into place with my command, I sent a cloud of silver energy rolling through the area where I’d seen the movement. The illuminating energy caught on something, or someone, who stood about two-feet-tall and had shiny brown hair. The creature blinking down at me from the top of one of the bookshelves had enormous dark eyes. It grinned widely before spreading