Man and Superman George Bernard Shaw (bill gates best books TXT) š
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the son of an English manufacturer of office furniture, your friends would consider it a misalliance. And hereās my silly old dad, who is the biggest office furniture man in the world, would show me the door for marrying the most perfect lady in England merely because she has no handle to her name. Of course itās just absurd. But I tell you, Violet, I donāt like deceiving him. I feel as if I was stealing his money. Why wonāt you let me own up?
Violet
We canāt afford it. You can be as romantic as you please about love, Hector; but you mustnāt be romantic about money.
Hector
Divided between his uxoriousness and his habitual elevation of moral sentiment. Thatās very English. Appealing to her impulsively. Violet: Dadās bound to find us out some day.
Violet
Oh yes, later on of course. But donāt letās go over this every time we meet, dear. You promisedā ā
Hector
All right, all right, Iā ā
Violet
Not to be silenced. It is I and not you who suffer by this concealment; and as to facing a struggle and poverty and all that sort of thing I simply will not do it. Itās too silly.
Hector
You shall not. Iāll sort of borrow the money from my dad until I get on my own feet; and then I can own up and pay up at the same time.
Violet
Alarmed and indignant. Do you mean to work? Do you want to spoil our marriage?
Hector
Well, I donāt mean to let marriage spoil my character. Your friend Mr. Tanner has got the laugh on me a bit already about that; andā ā
Violet
The beast! I hate Jack Tanner.
Hector
Magnanimously. Oh, heās all right: he only needs the love of a good woman to ennoble him. Besides, heās proposed a motoring trip to Nice; and Iām going to take you.
Violet
How jolly!
Hector
Yes; but how are we going to manage? You see, theyāve warned me off going with you, so to speak. Theyāve told me in confidence that youāre married. Thatās just the most overwhelming confidence Iāve ever been honored with.
Tanner returns with Straker, who goes to his car.
Tanner
Your car is a great success, Mr. Malone. Your engineer is showing it off to Mr. Ramsden.
Hector
Eagerlyā āforgetting himself. Letās come, Vi.
Violet
Coldly, warning him with her eyes. I beg your pardon, Mr. Malone, I did not quite catchā ā
Hector
Recollecting himself. I ask to be allowed the pleasure of showing you my little American steam car, Miss Robinson.
Violet
I shall be very pleased. They go off together down the avenue.
Tanner
About this trip, Straker.
Straker
Preoccupied with the car. Yes?
Tanner
Miss Whitefield is supposed to be coming with me.
Straker
So I gather.
Tanner
Mr. Robinson is to be one of the party.
Straker
Yes.
Tanner
Well, if you can manage so as to be a good deal occupied with me, and leave Mr. Robinson a good deal occupied with Miss Whitefield, he will be deeply grateful to you.
Straker
Looking round at him. Evidently.
Tanner
āEvidently!ā Your grandfather would have simply winked.
Straker
My grandfather would have touched his at.
Tanner
And I should have given your good nice respectful grandfather a sovereign.
Straker
Five shillins, more likely. He leaves the car and approaches Tanner. What about the ladyās views?
Tanner
She is just as willing to be left to Mr. Robinson as Mr. Robinson is to be left to her. Straker looks at his principal with cool scepticism; then turns to the car whistling his favorite air. Stop that aggravating noise. What do you mean by it? Straker calmly resumes the melody and finishes it. Tanner politely hears it out before he again addresses Straker, this time with elaborate seriousness. Enry: I have ever been a warm advocate of the spread of music among the masses; but I object to your obliging the company whenever Miss Whitefieldās name is mentioned. You did it this morning, too.
Straker
Obstinately. Itās not a bit o use. Mr. Robinson may as well give it up first as last.
Tanner
Why?
Straker
Garn! You know why. Course itās not my business; but you neednāt start kiddin me about it.
Tanner
I am not kidding. I donāt know why.
Straker
Cheerfully sulky. Oh, very well. All right. It aināt my business.
Tanner
Impressively. I trust, Enry, that, as between employer and engineer, I shall always know how to keep my proper distance, and not intrude my private affairs on you. Even our business arrangements are subject to the approval of your Trade Union. But donāt abuse your advantages. Let me remind you that Voltaire said that what was too silly to be said could be sung.
Straker
It wasnāt Voltaire: it was Bow Mar Shay.
Tanner
I stand corrected: Beaumarchais of course. Now you seem to think that what is too delicate to be said can be whistled. Unfortunately your whistling, though melodious, is unintelligible. Come! thereās nobody listening: neither my genteel relatives nor the secretary of your confounded Union. As man to man, Enry, why do you think that my friend has no chance with Miss Whitefield?
Straker
Cause sheās arter summun else.
Tanner
Bosh! who else?
Straker
You.
Tanner
Me!!!
Straker
Mean to tell me you didnāt know? Oh, come, Mr. Tanner!
Tanner
In fierce earnest. Are you playing the fool, or do you mean it?
Straker
With a flash of temper. Iām not playin no fool. More coolly. Why, itās as plain as the nose on your face. If you aināt spotted that, you donāt know much about these sort of things. Serene again. Excuse me, you know, Mr. Tanner; but you asked me as man to man; and I told you as man to man.
Tanner
Wildly appealing to the heavens. Then Iā āI am the bee, the spider, the marked down victim, the destined prey.
Straker
I dunno about the bee and the spider. But the marked down victim, thatās what you are and no mistake; and a jolly good job for you, too, I should say.
Tanner
Momentously. Henry Straker: the
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