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I just like kids!”

“Are you a pervert or something?”

“What?  Wait, no!”

 

* Snap back *

 

“Can you identify yourselves please?”

“Oh, officer!  Thank god you’re here.  We’re trying to find our daughter!”

“Your daughter?”

“What, you don’t think my wife here could have a child?”

“Your… ‘wife?’ ”

“Jesus.  You’re a closed-minded asshole, aren’t you?”

 

* Snap back *

 

“Can you identify yourselves please?”

“Officer, thank god you’re here!  We’re trying to find my friend’s daughter!”

“Well…was she in this building?”

“Yeah.  She ran off. Have you seen her?”

“No, I haven’t…”

“Do you have any kids?  You must know how we feel.”

“I have a daughter too. Don’t worry.  We’ll find her.  What’s her name?”

“Georgia.  How about you?”

“Andrea.”

“Aw man, nice.  How old is she?”

“She’s only two.”

“Is she healthy and all that?”

“Uh, yeah…I mean we had a bit of a scare when she was just a few months, but…shouldn’t we be looking for your friend’s daughter?”

 

* Snap back *

 

“Can you identify yourselves please?”

“Barry!  How’s it going, man?”

“I’m sorry, do I…”

“How’s Sarah doing?”

“Sarah?  She’s…fine…doing fine…”

“You’ve been married, what, five years now?”

“Six, actually.”

“Oh man, six?  Feels like only a year ago, doesn’t it?  And the little one, Andrea?”

“She’s, uh..well after the scare I mean…it’s all…”

“I knew you two would get through that.  You’re both too strong to let something like that get you down.  I always told people that.”

“Well, thanks man. I appreciate that.  But hey, is everything okay in here? I thought I heard raised voices.  I mean, this is private property and…”

“Oh we’re just here for Jack, he asked us to fetch a few things.  You remember his girlfriend, right?”

“ ‘Girlfriend?’ ”

“Oh, right.  I forgot.  You’re a god damn asshole.”

“What??”

 

* Snap back *

 

“Can you identify yourselves please?”

“Barry!  How’s it going, man?”

“I’m sorry, do I…”

“How’s Sarah doing?”

“Sarah?  She’s…fine…doing fine…”

“You’ve been married what, five years now?”

“Six, actually.”

“Oh man, six?  Feels like only a year ago, doesn’t it?  And the little one, Andrea?”

“She’s, uh…well after the scare I mean…it’s all…”

“I knew you two would get through that.  You’re both too strong to let something like that get you down.  I always told people that.”

“Well thanks man, I appreciate that.  But hey, is everything okay in here? I heard some raised voices.  I mean, this is private property and…”

“Oh, we’re just here for Jack.  He asked us to fetch a few things.  You remember Billie, right?”

“Oh right, yeah!  You’re Jack’s, uh…yeah, no, I remember you.  Look, just keep it down and make it quick, alright?  I mean, really, it’s just meant to be Jack in here after hours.”

“No worries, man.  We’ll be out of here in no time.”

“Say hi to Antony for me!” he called out as Barry left the room.

“You know him?” I asked.

Walter shook his head.  “Nah, lucky guess.  Anyway, where were we?”

###

About the Author

Jamie Crothall has a wife, two teenage girls, a mortgage, and works at a large corporation. Naturally, his two favourite hobbies are whiskey and writing.  He also makes wooden swords, which no one finds concerning.  At all.  He was born in Gravesend, England, (a community on the Thames where they mythically dumped all the plague victims), raised in Sudbury, Ontario, (a mining community plagued by harsh Canadian winters), and currently lives in Cambridge, Ontario, (overall impression still pending). He started writing about 30 years ago, to impress a girl.  She was impressed.  So was her boyfriend.

He also impressed the judges at the Write-Fighters 3-Day Novella-Writing Contest not once, but twice, for his novellas: The Foreigner State and The Devil’s Copper.

If you have enjoyed this book, please don’t forget to leave a review.

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