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we were. I knew him better than I did anyone else and he knew all my secrets that I wouldn’t dare reveal to anyone else. That’s what we were.

Even now, almost a year later, it felt weird not seeing him all the time. Sometimes the guilt of leaving was enough to overwhelm me. But when I went to cry over it, all the ghosts would ask me a million questions about why I was so upset and my tears turned into anger. I hated how things were now, it didn’t seem fair. But I didn’t have anyone to blame, the Event was nobody’s fault.

Despite my restless mind, I managed to drift off to sleep. It wasn’t for long. Somewhere, in the early hours of the morning, an alarm started blaring in the distance.

Alarms were normal. They weren’t usually something to be too concerned about. This one was different, it was far louder than any I had heard since the Event and it was coming directly from the city.

I pushed back the bed covers and hurried to the window. My only concern was for Oliver. He was somewhere in the city, he could be right where the alarm was going off. Every part of my body drained of warmth, leaving me cold as I moved.

Pulling back the curtains, the city glowed down the hill in the distance. Between all the dilapidated buildings were plumes of smoke. Something was burning.

Something big.

I wanted to run down to them, find Oliver in the crowds and make sure he was okay. I desperately needed to know he wasn’t caught up in whatever was causing the huge fires. For the city to be so lit up the blazes had to be consuming a large portion of the streets.

Surely Oliver would know better and stay away from that kind of danger? Surely he would do everything he could to keep himself safe?

But he was still Oliver. And Oliver felt compelled to help every person he could. It was what made him such a beautiful person. His sense of selflessness had been proven to me time and time again. If there was a fire and people needed help, he would be in the thick of it.

Now I really needed to find him. I had to know he was alive and well. I wouldn’t be able to think of anything else until I knew for sure. If anything happened to Oliver… I didn’t know what I would do.

I didn’t bother dressing. I ran through the house and burst through the front door. I barely had shoes on my feet before I made it to the front gate.

And then I stopped.

Because I could not go any further.

I had not stepped foot outside that gate in almost a year. Not since I had chosen the house to be my home and refuge. Opening the wire barrier and passing through it seemed as impossible as the world being able to restore itself.

“She’s leaving.”

“No, she’s not.”

“She’ll never leave this place.”

“She could.”

“What’s stopping her?” The running commentary from my forty-three friends was invading my thoughts. That was all I needed at that moment.

“What’s the alarm for?”

“It’s coming from the city.”

“Oooh, it’s a fire.”

“A darn big one.”

“I hope it doesn’t come up here.”

“Why would it do that?”

“It’s a fire, it can do whatever it wants.”

“Kind of like you.”

“Not like Everly, though.”

“No, she can’t even leave.”

“She’s a coward.”

“You can’t say that.”

“I can if it’s true.”

The worst thing was they were right. I couldn’t leave. No matter how much my heart ached to know Oliver was okay, I couldn’t step one foot past the gate.

And I hated myself for it.

Oliver could be hurt somewhere, he could be in dire need of help with nobody else there to care for him. He could have been lying down hurt and hoping I would find him to save his life. And I wouldn’t come.

Apparently not even that horrible thought was enough to get me to overcome my fears. If Oliver needing me wasn’t enough, nothing ever would be. I was destined to spend the rest of my life in that house.

Alone.

With my ghosts.

I ran back inside and slammed the door behind me, regardless of who had followed at my heels. They kept up their chatter as we moved upstairs.

I crawled back into bed and pulled the covers up over my head. I didn’t need their opinions and judgments. I already loathed myself for choosing the path of the coward, I didn’t need to hear it from them, too.

Sleep was impossible from then onwards. There was no way I was going to get any more shuteye when the city was burning only a short distance away.

I tossed and turned as I thought about Oliver. I needed him to be okay, he had to be okay. If he wasn’t, I would have absolutely no reason to stay connected to the city. I could run further away, disappear into the world at large and never have to be reminded of everything we’d lost.

Or my guilt.

Morning was almost a relief as I had a reason to get out of bed. It was only to feed myself so I didn’t die of starvation, but it was something. I wasn’t ready to die yet, I was too much of a coward for even that.

“She’s up.”

“She looks terrible.”

“The poor dear didn’t sleep at all.”

“She should have gone into the city.”

I listened to them all the way into the kitchen. It was nearly impossible to drown them out. I had never met more opinionated people in my life. If I had, they wouldn’t have been in my life for very long.

Pouring my ration of cereal, I looked beyond the yard to see the city. It was no longer

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