a Pleasure Rites, #1 Ines Johnson (rainbow fish read aloud .txt) 📖

wasn't hard to see in the dim room. The solar lights, though full of gathered energy from the day, were now dimmed. Her eyes met a hairless chest. The forearm that belonged to the chest made up and down motions. She felt the maneuvers on her back. She didn't want to move, but she wanted to see Jian's eyes. She tilted her head up.

Jian stared at the ceiling. The lines of his face relaxed, peaceful. His eyes darted quickly here and then there, lost in thought. Sensing her attention, his gaze turned to Chanyn and he smiled. It caught Chanyn's breath. He'd never smiled at her unprovoked. This smile he gave to her freely.

"Hi," she said.

"How are you feeling, my lady?"

There was a bit of soreness between her thighs. It was the first time she'd felt sore there. After the first time with Jian she had only felt a pleasant fullness. Thinking on that night alone with Jian brought the happenings of last night, actually still this night, back to the forefront of Chanyn's mind.

"Where are Dain and Khial?"

Jian rolled Chanyn fully onto her back and came over top of her. His chest, in his open robes, met her naked breasts. "The activities of the night exerted Lord Dain."

Chanyn's eyes widened. If Dain were ill, she needed to go to him. She made a move to get up.

"He's fine," Jian assured her. "But Lord Khial thought it best if they retire to their own room so that you both could rest in peace."

For a moment disappointment crept into Chanyn's heart. They didn't include her in the decision. She was a part of their bond now. But then she realized that their decision afforded her more time alone with Jian. She wasn't sure how much time she would have with him before she became pregnant and they had to part ways permanently.

Chanyn relaxed under him. Though she was a bit sore, she still wanted him. They hadn't made love since that first time over a week ago. He'd only held her and fallen asleep with her in his arms a few nights back. And though it was the best night she'd ever experienced, she wanted to feel him and him alone inside her.

Chanyn reached up to caress his face. Jian covered her hand with his, regret on his brows. He closed his eyes and kissed her palm. Then he turned from her and rose from the bed. Chanyn didn't like the distance he put between them.

"I've run you an herbal bath," he said. "For the soreness. And to ensure the viability of the conception."

"You think I'm already with child? From just the one time?"

Jian's fingers spread across her stomach. "I felt the energy move through you. I'm certain the Goddess has blessed this union."

Chanyn felt her world caving in from all sides.

On the one hand, she'd achieved the primary goal of tonight's activities. She was likely pregnant.

On the other hand, she would have to give up the man she loved. She knew this was part of the deal, coming into this room. She just hadn't expected it to be over so soon.

Looking into Jian's face, she saw loss written in his strong jawline.

"Come." He scooped her up into his embrace, holding her with a gentle firmness against his chest.

He carried her to the bathroom, where sweet smelling aromas clouded the air. Jian knelt down to the tub with her in his arms, but Chanyn clung to his neck.

"How long?" she demanded. "How long before you go?"

"The morning." Jian held her eyes. "The water will help to heal any wounds."

He lowered her into the cool water, never taking his eyes off her. The water felt amazing to her skin, to her sore muscles. Jian took a sponge and dipped it into the water, running it down her bare breasts. He bowed over his work with focused attention, each drop he squeezed, a benediction, each movement, a declaration of his love.

All her life, for nearly twenty-one years, Chanyn had been touch-starved. Her mother had no warm embrace, no kind words, no care for her. In the past week Chanyn had made two, possibly three friends. She'd had her hand held. She'd been hugged. She'd been kissed. She'd felt love.

For a moment, she closed her eyes and soaked it all in, overwhelmed by the amount of it.

When Jian's hand stilled, she opened her eyes. His face, usually so neutral, mirrored the awe she felt.

"I used to dream of you," Chanyn said. "All my life, I dreamed that a man would love and care for me. I wanted it so badly. For the last ten years, I dreamed so hard. And here you are. I should be sad, and I am. Sad that I can't keep you."

Water pooled at the edges of Jian's eyes. He shut them tightly, but a solitary tear escaped. "I am sorry."

"Don't be." Chanyn wiped the tear away. "Just because we won't get to see each other anymore, doesn't mean the love stops. Right?"

The liquid brimming at the corners of Jian's eyes filled with want. He reached for her once more. His robes got drenched as he brought her out of the water. He carried her back to the bed, along with a towel. Slowly and methodically, he cleansed each droplet.

It wasn't sexual. It was reverent. When she was dry, Chanyn felt reborn. Jian climbed onto the bed beside her and enfolded her in his arms.

"When I leave in the morning," he whispered. "I'll leave you a gift."

"A gift?"

"Yes," he answered but said nothing further.

Chanyn held him tightly to her. In the morning she would be staying here with her new husbands and growing child. He would return to the temple to continue his work.

His work.

Jealousy reared. "You'll be returning to the temple?"

"Yes," he answered. "There is much work to be done."

Chanyn stiffened in his arms. "Right. Your work."

Goddess, what if she saw him out with another woman? What if he serviced her cousin Merlyn?

Jian reached a hand under her chin