Off the Record Camryn Garrett (best book club books txt) 📖

the people Penny mentioned reaching out to. One of the people who are rumored to have been one of Roy’s victims. I watch her move around the room, a glass of wine in her hand, stopping to talk with people and flashing smiles.

Would it be ridiculous to approach her? I lick my lips. I can’t ask her about the rumors, not here, not in front of everyone. But maybe I can ask her about Penny. Is that horrible? That’s definitely putting her on the spot, but in a gentle way. Asking about Penny is just asking if she knows someone. That’s normal small talk.

God. Why am I so bad at this?

I close my eyes. It’s okay if she says no. She probably won’t be mean about it. Probably. And I’m doing this for a good reason. I take a deep breath and force myself away from the wall.

Tallulah Port has just plucked a cocktail shrimp from a waiter’s tray when I finally reach her, taking the biggest steps I can muster. She smiles at me in the small, bland way baristas do when you’re about to make an order.

“Um,” I say. “Hi.”

She continues smiling. “Hi.”

I swallow, willing the words to come out. She takes a sip of wine and glances around the room.

“I’m Josie,” I say. “And, um, I’m friends with Penny. Penny Livingstone?”

Her face drops, just for a second, before she regains composure.

“Oh, Penny,” she says. “She’s the sweetest, isn’t she?”

“Yeah,” I say. I can’t quite read her expression. “I was just, uh, wondering if you’ve gotten the chance to speak to her lately?”

I’m sweating. Why am I sweating? I clench my arms close to my sides so that no one can see the stains soon to form under them.

“I’m afraid I haven’t,” Tallulah Port says, lifting up her glass of wine. “I’ve been so busy.”

“Sure,” I say. “I just wanted—”

“I’m sorry,” she says, stepping around me. “I’m afraid I see a dear friend I’ve been meaning to catch up with.”

“Oh,” I say. “But—”

“So nice meeting you,” she says, flashing the same barista smile. Then she’s gone.

Well, that couldn’t have gone any worse.

@JosieTheJournalist: i hate everything

It takes about twenty minutes for Penny to find me, during which time I stuff myself full with spinach puffs and shrimp to suppress the guilt.

“I can’t believe you didn’t look for me!” Penny says. She grins so wide, I can smell the wine on her breath. “I was looking for you! So was Marius!”

I try not to frown at his name. Maybe I shouldn’t be so hard on him.

“Why do you look so sad?” Penny asks, knocking her elbow with mine. “It’s a party. You’re supposed to have fun. This is maybe the one time we get to have fun this entire trip.”

“I don’t know,” I say. “Technically, I’m supposed to be working.”

Penny rolls her eyes. I smile a little.

“I’m technically working, too,” she says. “It’s okay to take a break. You’re so serious all the time. Let me go find Marius, and maybe—”

I grab her arm before she can go. She frowns.

“Maybe not,” I say. “Don’t you—aren’t you weirded out about him doing this movie with Lennox? I can’t stop thinking about it.”

“Of course.” She sways a bit. “Of course it freaks me out. But I— He doesn’t listen. He never wants to talk about it.”

I glance around, lowering my voice.

“Never wants to talk about the movie or the allegations?”

“Both.” Penny waves a hand. “All of it. He makes me want to scream. He just tells me he can handle himself and knows what he’s doing.”

Penny’s been trying to tell him about the allegations and he just waves her off? I swallow my frustration and decide to change the subject. “I sort of tried to talk to Tallulah Port. About—you know.”

Penny’s eyes go big.

“Here?”

“I wasn’t obvious,” I hiss. “I’m not that stupid.”

“I didn’t say you were,” she says, lowering her voice. “I just—I told you that she didn’t answer any of my emails. Plus, she doesn’t even know you.”

“I know,” I say. “I just—I don’t know. She was here and I figured that I should ask her before the moment was gone. You know?”

“What did she say?”

“Nothing,” I say. “Literally nothing. I just asked if she knew you, and she was kind of weird and then said she had to go.”

Penny presses her lips together.

“I don’t know,” I say again. “I guess we can find some other people to ask, right?”

Penny rubs her eyes. Suddenly, she doesn’t look so bubbly anymore.

“I hope so,” she says. “I’ve been asking around since Eve, and it doesn’t seem like anyone wants to talk.”

My stomach squirms. I want to curl into a ball and watch Real Housewives and pretend this isn’t as hard as it is. But I can’t. I have to be strong for Penny.

“We got Julia,” I say. “And we’ll get someone else. Maybe it’ll take a while, but we’ll do it.”

Penny glances at me but doesn’t say anything.

“Come on,” I say, grabbing her hand. “Let’s find some spinach puffs.”

I get Penny to sit with me in the corner and eat spinach puffs while we talk about our favorite members of One Direction (Harry for me and Zayn for her) and our favorite old Disney Channel movies. By the time I finally spot Marius, we’re deep into conversation about our early celebrity crushes. He’s across the room, wearing a dress shirt and black slacks, and he’s looking right at me. Shit.

“Yeah, I know Ryan Gosling is so cliché, but I just couldn’t help it,” Penny is saying. “Everyone was talking about The Notebook and I thought he was just so…”

Her voice fades out as Marius starts walking toward us, excusing himself from a circle of giggling starlets in sparkly dresses and weaving between other groups of people. Someone stops him, smiling, and Marius glances back over here before engaging in the conversation.

“Anyway, I think it’s really cute how he’s like a family man now,” Penny