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all the time, working and dealing with everything that’s required for starting a new church, and he did not have a lot of time to help my mother with Steve and me. Since we had moved three hours to the south, we didn’t really know anyone yet. Sure, there were a few families that had started following my dad on the radio that joined up right away, but overall, all of my mother’s close friends and family still lived up near Syracuse.

“Soon the baby came, and it was a little girl. My parents named her Hope. She was adorable and Steve took to her almost immediately. Honestly, I was surprised since he’d always been such a brat to me. I figured he would fight hard against being replaced as the baby. But Steve loved her so much that all he wanted to do was be around her and help Mom.”

“I didn’t know you had another sister,” Dana said softly. Her heart sank in her chest as she imagined what must have happened to this sister she’d never met.

“There was a crisis at the church right after Hope was born. Dad was gone all the time. My mother did her best to take care of us all, but, though we didn’t know it at the time, she was suffering from severe postpartum depression. We didn’t understand what was going on, just that Mommy was acting strange and being very mean at times. I think my mom tried to talk to my dad about it, but at that time, postpartum depression wasn’t a thing.”

He stopped talking and did not look at her as he choked down his grief. Dana’s heart broke for him. She wasn’t sure that she wanted to know what came next. When he spoke again, his voice cracked.

“One night my mother was giving Hope a bath. Steve and I were playing in the living room while watching cartoons on television. I remember thinking that it was suddenly so very quiet. You know how kids get when everything goes quiet? Steve and I felt restless. Before long we were fighting, and Steve ran off to tell Mom about something I’d done. Honestly, I think it was just an excuse to go find Mommy, not really because he was all that mad at me.

“It was then that I heard the most horrible shriek I’ve ever heard in my life. I ran into the other room to investigate and found Steve soaked to the bone and holding something in his arms. He was crying and screaming, and I was afraid that maybe he’d hurt himself. I was so shocked that my mom had not come running as soon as the shouting began. It was then that I noticed what was in his arms. It was Hope. She was soaking wet and very blue.”

Dana gasped. “Oh my God.”

“Yeah. Once the shock finally wore off, I went in search of Mom. I found her unconscious on the bed. She had taken some pills to help her relax and they had knocked her out instead. The effects hit her when she’d gone into the other room to get Hope some fresh clothes. She’d only meant to lie on the bed for a minute but fell asleep. I tried to wake her, but I couldn’t.

“Since this was before cell phones, we had no way of contacting Dad. All we could do was sit there and pray. Steve prayed so hard for God to bring Hope back to life, while I cried. I have no idea how long it was before Dad finally came home. To us, it felt like a lifetime. My brother was never the same after that night.”

Dana was speechless. She thought she knew everything about Jared and his family, but this revelation was far beyond anything she could have ever imagined. It did, however, shed some light on the underlining strain in relationships she sensed whenever she visited the Caddrets. It was so sad that this tragedy had torn them all apart.

They rounded a corner and the club came into view. Jared forced a smile and wiped his eyes with his sleeve. “Well, anyway, here we are. Are you ready to have some fun? I sure am. I think I might even let down my hair a bit and try a beer.”

“What?” Dana said incredulously. “I’m pretty sure you will hate it.”

“You think so? I have always wondered what all the hubbub was about. I mean, it smells like piss, but a lot of people seem to like it.”

Dana crinkled her nose in disgust. “Well, trust me, it tastes like it smells. I took a sip of my dad’s once when I was a kid and I nearly threw up. As soon as it touched my tongue, I spit it out onto the living room carpet. I thought for sure he was going to yell at me, but all he did was laugh and ask me if I wanted another sip. I’ve never had a desire for it again.”

They continued talking as they approached the club’s entrance. The building was painted all black including the windows, giving the club a grimy appearance. Posters plastered the wall around the small ticket window next to the door. A large neon sign prominently displayed Steve’s band, along with two other names Jared and Dana didn’t recognize. To their surprise, the front of the building was packed with people waiting to get in.

Jared pushed through the crowd toward the ticket window, Dana gripping his arm as they made their way through the throng. The line was not too large, so it didn’t take them long to get the tickets and passes Steve had left, and muscle their way through the doors. Inside, the club was painted black, the rooms lit only with an eerie purple glow. Before they even entered the main auditorium, Dana could hear the loud thumping of drums reverberating. The beat moved through her in pulsing waves of energy that rattled her bones and

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