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often

distorted along the way. I could not think that Wickham

would elope with Miss Lydia Bennet. She had nothing to

tempt him, and he had no score to settle with the Bennets. He must know that such behaviour would make

him an outcast. It was too great a price to pay for the

pleasure of marrying a silly young girl with no name and

no fortune. And then, indeed, how could he marry her?

She was under age. He could take her to Gretna Green

but the journey would cost a great deal, and I knew he

would not spend half that amount unless his bride was a

considerable heiress.

‘They left Brighton together on Saturday night and

were traced almost to London, but not beyond; they are

certainly not gone to Scotland.’

I began to gain an idea of what must have happened.

Wickham knew London. He knew where he could lie

concealed.And when he had taken his pleasure, he could

abandon Miss Lydia Bennet with impunity.

All this had followed from my insufferable pride. If I

had made Wickham’s character known it could not have

happened, but I had disdained to do it, and in consequence I had hurt the woman I loved.

‘What has been done, what has been attempted to

recover her?’ I asked.

I needed to know, so that I would understand how best

to use my time, and how to conduct my own search. I

would not rest until Elizabeth’s sister was returned to her.

‘My father is gone to London, and Jane has written to

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beg my uncle’s immediate assistance, and we shall be off,

I hope, in half an hour.’

Half an hour! After all my hopes, to lose Elizabeth so

soon, but of course it must be done.

‘How is such a man to be worked on? How are they

even to be discovered? I have not the smallest hope. It is

every way horrible!’

I could say nothing, do nothing, but give her my silent

sympathy and hope it strengthened her. I longed to

embrace her, but her uncle would be returning at any

minute, and to do so would make the situation worse.

‘When my eyes were opened to his real character. Oh!

Had I known what I ought, what I dared to do! But I

knew not. I was afraid of doing too much. Wretched,

wretched mistake!’

I knew she must be wanting me gone. It was I who

had enjoined her to secrecy; I who had said she must

tell no one.And this had been the result.A sister ruined,

a family in turmoil.…She would not look at me. I was

not surprised. I managed a few incoherent words,

telling her I had nothing to plead in excuse of my stay

but concern.

‘This unfortunate affair will, I fear, prevent my sister’s

having the pleasure of seeing you at Pemberley today?’

As soon as I spoken, I thought how ridiculous the

words were. Of course it would prevent it. She did not

seem to mind, however, for she answered me directly.

‘Oh, yes. Be so kind as to apologize for us to Miss

Darcy. Conceal the unhappy truth as long as it is possible.

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I know it cannot be long.’

‘You can rely on my secrecy. I am sorry it had come

to this – I wish you a happier conclusion to events than

now seems possible.’

Because if a happy conclusion is possible, I will contrive it somehow, I thought.

With that I left her to her solitude and returned to

Pemberley.

‘You have been abroad early,’ said Caroline as I entered

the saloon. ‘You have been visiting Miss Eliza Bennet,

perhaps?’

I saw the jealousy in her eyes, and heard it in her

voice. I had never realized until that moment how deeply

she wanted me. Or perhaps it would be fairer to say, how

deeply she wanted Pemberley.Without it, she would have

regarded me as nothing. My handwriting could have

been the most even in the world and she would not have

thought fit to comment on it.

‘Yes, I have,’ I returned.

‘And how is she this morning?’

‘She is very well.’

‘And we will be seeing her later, I suppose? How

these country people bore one with their visits.’

‘No, she will not be calling.’

‘Not bad news from home, I hope?’ asked Caroline.

‘Lydia Bennet has not run off with one of the officers?’

I started, but then controlled myself. She could not

have heard about it. Elizabeth had told no one but

myself. Caroline’s words were the result of spite, and their

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A M A N D A G R A N G E

accuracy was nothing more than luck.

‘Or perhaps her accomplished sister – Mary, is it not?

– visited Lydia in Brighton and attracted the attention of

the Prince of Wales? Perhaps he has invited the whole

family to stay with him, so that they can share in Mary’s

triumph as she entertains him at the Marine Pavilion,’

she said in a droll voice.

‘Her uncle has had to take her home. He has been

forced to curtail his holiday, as an urgent business matter

has called him back to London.’

‘These city men and their urgent business,’ said Caroline, conveniently forgetting, as is her habit, that her

father made his fortune from trade.

‘That is what comes of having an uncle in Cheapside,’

said Louisa.‘I pity Miss Eliza Bennet. It must be mortifying to have to cut short a holiday on account of business.’

‘It reminds me that I, too, have business to attend to,

which I have neglected for too long,’ I said shortly. ‘You

will excuse me for a few days, I am sure.’

‘You are going to London?’ asked Bingley.

‘Yes.’

‘What a good idea. I should love a few days in London,’

said Caroline.

‘In all this heat?’ asked Louisa.

‘The heat is nothing,’ she said.

‘Can your business not wait?’ said Bingley to me. ‘I

have to go to London myself at the end of the month.

We could go together.’

‘Unfortunately it is urgent. Stay and enjoy Pemberley.

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M r . D a r c y ’ s D i a r y 2 2 9

There is plenty for you to do here, and my sister

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