Myths and Gargoyles Jamie Hawke (i read a book .TXT) 📖

soon enough I was out, gasping for breath and totally exhausted.

“Now weapons,” Red said, indicating the various trainers. “And then back in there again.”

“Fuck… me. Are you serious?”

“Jack—”

“I know, I know. Evil and all that.” I stood, hands up behind my head, and said, “Okay, give me a sword.”

“Not yet,” she replied with a grin, motioning toward a large lady in a wrestling outfit. “First, takedowns and joint locks. Evasive maneuvers and the like.”

Pucky was leaning against the opposite wall, trying to hold back a laugh.

“Piss break?” I asked.

“Not until you finish another round. What, you’re going to stop in the middle of battle and take a piss? I don’t think so.”

I groaned, figuring I could hold it but not wanting to, and stepped in with this lady that in my head I called Gertrude. Needless to say, she threw me around like a sock full of quarters. Wham! On the mat. Bam! On the mat again. But it wasn’t all abuse—she showed me how to throw people over my hips and other defensive techniques I’d seen in movies.

When it came time to use the sword, I could barely hold onto the wooden one they gave me, and was disarmed at least four or five times.

And on and on it went, with Elisa taking notes and giving me her thoughts on what I should level up the next time I had prana, and what sort of skills I might want with the Ichor to offset my weaknesses.

Finally I went back through the course, got a chance to take a break, then went to take a piss. Every muscle felt cramped and battered, and when I went to pull my dick out at the urinal, even my finger cramped and made it hard to do.

But man, that piss felt like a thousand tiny angels as they escaped my bladder and danced their way into the urinal.

“You always make so much noise when peeing?” Pucky said, walking up behind me and giving me a slap on the ass.

“Oye,” I said, glancing around, only then realizing it was likely a unisex bathroom. “I didn’t realize I was making a sound.”

“Dude, you were moaning louder than when you came last time.”

“I had to piss. What can I say?”

She laughed, then entered a stall and said, “Get out, before you hear my tinkling. Seriously.”

I chuckled, but when she cleared her throat I quickly shook and got out of there, washing my hands on the way and then going to find water. They had some bottles set up, and Red joined me.

“You’re really not doing bad out there,” she said. “You know, for your first day.”

“I’m just glad it’s over,” I said, finishing the water and looking for another.

“Over?” she laughed. “We’re doing this all day, buddy.”

“The hell we are,” I said, then frowned. Dammit, based on the serious look in her eyes, she hadn’t been joking. “Whatever happened to working into it slowly? Avoiding injury and all that.”

She shrugged. “That’s for wusses, not the one and only Protector.”

“Fair point,” I said, standing. “Then let’s get on with it. No use sitting around wasting time.”

She raised an eyebrow, chuckled and then followed me back over to the course. Pucky emerged from the bathroom a second later, and I called out to her, “Better hurry, slowpoke,” and then darted into the course, hoping to make a better go of it this time around.

True to Red’s word, we ran through several more times, our breaks in the form of weapons training, such as knives and even a bit with a pistol, and bow and arrow.

When it was finally over that night and we got back to the mansion, Pucky helped me walk to bed, my legs like jelly, and then I pulled her down with me.

She giggled, seeming to think I was going to try something, but I rolled over, my head against her breasts, and without even realizing it was out for the night. Damn comfy pillows though.

20

The second day was more of the same, though my warrior class was helping me learn fast at the sword-fighting station. My instructor still kicked my ass, naturally, but at least I only had my sword knocked out of my hands once, and even got in a kill of my own toward the end. Elisa brought her workout shorts and sports bra, joining in for the obstacle course this time, and she gave me a run for my money.

I still couldn’t believe we were doing this at a stage on a movie studio lot, which was funny in itself, considering how much else there was for me to have a hard time believing.

As fun as it all was, when we were finished and back home for dinner, I was exhausted and ready to stuff my face. Definitely not as exhausted as the first night, as my leveling up was apparently helping my body recover faster, or maybe it was the food.

Elisa had a chef prepare a pesto-based chicken breast meal, complete with broccoli and spinach, for optimal muscle growth and rejuvenation. To my surprise, it was actually quite delicious, reminding me of my dad’s cooking growing up, when he hadn’t been too busy with late nights at the bank.

Eating here, laughing and reminiscing over the day with my new team, I started to wonder how my family was doing. Regardless of what these ladies told me about my new life, at some point I’d have to check in on my parents. There was no way I would let anyone tell me otherwise. Toward the end of the meal, we had a quick check-in with Mowgli via video conference on a screen toward the back of the dining room, but nothing concrete had been uncovered yet.

We finished our meals and the call, and were all pretty much ready to crash for the night. Or so I thought. Red and Pucky stood to retire to their beds, and I had just started to push my chair back.

“Stay,” Elisa said, and the