All the Little Things Sarah Lawton (red white royal blue TXT) 📖

lucky that you got Nana’s lovely shiny brown hair and not Grandad’s curly hair, like mine!’ She ruffled Vivian’s head, grinning down at her.

Vivian just pulled a face, and leaned away. ‘Get off. Hurry up, Mummy!’

‘Go and get your bits together, okay? I’ll jump in the shower.’

Rachel pulled back the shower curtain and nearly slipped out of the bath entirely. Vivian was standing in the bathroom with her jacket on and her bag on her shoulders, watching her silently.

‘Viv! You nearly gave me a heart attack!’ She reached past her and pulled a towel to her, wrapping it round herself. ‘Funny girl,’ she whispered, pressing her lips to Vivian’s forehead.

Vivian pulled away, as she usually did. ‘You’re all wet, Mum. Hurry up, I want to go now.’

‘I need to get ready first, babe. Give me ten minutes.’

Vivian followed her through to her bedroom, perching on the bed and watching as she got dressed, intently observing her putting on make-up. ‘Why do people wear make-up?’ she asked, picking up a lipstick and screwing it up and down, up and down.

‘To look nice, I guess.’

‘You already look nice,’

‘Ah, thank you, sweetheart.’

‘Does everyone wear it? Lexie has got some lip gloss, but I don’t like it, it’s sticky. Do I have to wear make-up?’

‘Not if you don’t want to. You’re beautiful as you are.’

‘I’m not,’ said Vivian, matter-of-factly. ‘I want to look like Lexie.’

‘Vivian,’ said Rachel, wracking her brain for the right words, ‘everyone is different. They like different things, but that doesn’t stop us being friends, or loving each other. You don’t have to be like Lexie for her to like you.’

‘No one else likes me, though. Everyone likes Lexie.’

‘I don’t think that’s anything to do with how you look, though, darling. It can be difficult when you’re eight, can’t it? It will get better, I promise. Come on, let’s go.’

The bar was crowded with Friday night customers, all jostling each other. Rachel was standing at the back wall by the steps that led down into the garden, waiting for Beth to come back with more drinks. She’d bumped into her at the tube station earlier in the week and despite trying to escape without notice, had been collared and strong-armed into handing over her number. Their catch-up had so far mainly consisted of Beth grilling her about exactly what she had been doing for the last ten years, no doubt in an effort to ascertain whether or not she was worth being friends with.

They’d briefly been close as teenagers, but Beth was the sort of person who could make you feel like you were their best friend but then drop you the second they found someone else interesting. Rachel was getting the distinct impression that this hadn’t changed and was trying to think of an excuse to leave when her phone rang.

‘Hello?’

‘Hi, Rachel? It’s Lucy.’

‘Hi, is everything okay? Give me two secs to get outside – it’s loud in here.’ She pushed through the crowd, tapping Beth on the shoulder as she did and gesturing to her phone. ‘Two secs,’ she told her, before squeezing out through the people milling at the door.

‘Lucy, hi, sorry, I’m at the Village – it’s manic in there. What’s up? Is Vivian okay?’

‘Er, yes, Vivian’s fine, it’s just, I think you need to come and get her.’ Rachel felt her stomach plunge, a looping sensation that made her feel drunker than she was.

‘I’ll come now. I’ll literally be two minutes.’ She tapped out an apology to Beth – who was bound to find someone to latch on to – and set off around the corner onto Eden Road and up to the little cottage. Knocking softly on the door she found herself biting her lip, nipping it hard enough to taste iron.

Lucy opened the door. ‘Rachel, I’m so sorry, I tried to call your mum but she wasn’t answering her mobile and I didn’t like to try the landline in case she was in bed already…’

‘It’s fine, honestly, but what’s wrong?’

‘Come in.’ She led Rachel into the little front room where Vivian was sitting on the sofa in her nightie. She didn’t look up, staring down at the floor instead, her face blank. She was hugging her knees to her chest, chin on her knees. Lucy gestured with her head and Rachel followed her into the hallway.

‘What happened?’

‘It might be better if I show you. Come up.’

Rachel followed Lucy up the stairs and into a small bedroom, where Lexie lay sleeping. She looked around. ‘I don’t understand, did she hurt herself on something?’

‘No,’ said Lucy. ‘Look.’ She walked over to her daughter’s sleeping form and ran her fingers over her head, and Rachel gasped, putting her hand to her mouth in shock. Lexie’s hair had been cut off in ragged chunks, the edges rough in the dim light from the hallway.

‘She brought the scissors with her, Rachel,’ said Lucy. ‘She waited until Lexie was asleep. I came in to check on them, and I found her cutting off her hair while she was asleep.’ There were tears in her eyes. ‘Why would she do that?’

Rachel

I woke up to Alex kissing his way down my body again. I felt like the whole day had been a dream, so I didn’t try to stop him; I encouraged him instead, lacing my fingers again through his hair. Maybe it wasn’t even real. The way he was using his mouth and his fingers, I didn’t think this was his first time, but it didn’t make the guilt any less. I could feel it simmering beneath the pleasure. He moved over me, kissed me, and slid himself into me again and we rocked gently together, slowly and exquisitely building up a tension that made me shudder and moan into his mouth. I could feel him smile his sharp smile. I bit his lip.

It was becoming almost unbearably good when we both froze as the front door opened and closed. We heard Vivian take off her shoes and