Mr. H.O.A. Carina Taylor (free e novels txt) 📖

"Bane, would you stop—"I tried to take a step back, but that was the exact moment he gave an extra hard tug at the back of the T-shirt.

Didn’t he know he was going to stretch it beyond repair? It was my last thought as I tumbled backward. The soft carpet was forgiving. The hard body that landed on top of mine was not.

"Oh no," Bane groaned. His hands were trapped beneath me. His head rested against the crook of my neck, his warm breath fanning over me. I held my breath, trying to not sniff his hair—hair that smelled like man-shampoo. I didn’t know if there was such a thing, but whatever he used didn’t smell floral. It was cedar tones and a rich—

"Are you sniffing me?"

One last long drag before I answered him. "No?"

He lifted himself off of me, yanking his hands from beneath me. He hurried to the set of drawers, opening one and pulling out an article of clothing that he tossed in my direction. It was a pair of athletic shorts. I stood quickly and pulled them on. They fell down around my ankles.

I tugged them back up and pulled the drawstring until it was tight around my waist.

Swallowing audibly at the look on Bane’s face, I apologized. "Sorry I woke you up, the laundry fairy had already put away all of my clothes."

Bane still looked stunned. "Naked. So naked."

I snorted and leapt onto the bed. "I’m wearing clothes now, thank you very much."

Bane stood there staring down at me, rather than climbing back in bed. "You’re wearing clothes. My clothes."

"Yes..."

He shifted his weight onto his heels. "Yup. I’m going to go sleep on the couch tonight."

"What? Why?"

He just grunted—he seemed to be doing that a lot this evening, grabbed his pillow and ran from the room as if Mumford was hot on his heels.

I felt bad about waking him up—I was always grumpy whenever I was unexpectedly woken up, but it didn’t mean he had to throw a tantrum about it. He could have just laid back down in bed and called it a night. Instead, he was out in the living room pouting about it. I mean, if I were going to pout, I’d at least do it in the comfort of the extra queen bed in my old room. It’s not like Dad was using it...

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

Homeowners Association Rule #43:

Lawn ornaments are strictly forbidden.

"Why is there a plunger in the backyard this morning?"

I sat at the barstool with my cup of coffee and stared at Sally, where he was busy peering through the blinds into the backyard.

"Probably just a practical joke or something," I mumbled against my mug. As if I wanted to explain why I'd forgotten the bathroom plunger outside.

"Good morning." Bane's gravelly morning voice made me straighten my shoulder and brush my hair behind my ears. Our late-night shenanigans meant I felt like death when I woke up. I hadn't looked in the mirror yet either, which meant it probably wasn't good based on the way Bane was staring at me.

"Sally, can I get you a cup of coffee?"

"No, I had mine an hour ago. I've got to get going. I can't laze about like you young folks on a Saturday."

I rolled my eyes and watched as Bane's face remained stoic. "Suit yourself."

Dad patted my shoulder on his way out the door.

Silence stretched in a measurable distance between Bane and me. The buffer was gone. I was alone in a room with a man who had been given every chance to like me but didn't. Instead, it didn’t even bother him to share a room. He probably only viewed me as a pesky roommate he felt obligated to keep safe.

Bane rocked from foot to foot. "I’m going to sleep in the queen room."

"Wait, what?" I looked up in surprise.

He cleared his throat before he turned from the window to face me. He shoved his hands in his pockets.

"Nola. I need to be perfectly honest with you. I couldn’t forgive myself if I’m not."

I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. Honest. Such an uncomfortable word. Especially when I was sitting in a house of lies of my own making while Bane had no clue.

"I like you," he finally said.

"I like you too." I smiled encouragingly even while I tried to think of a scenario when I told Bane the truth and he didn’t hate me for the rest of his life.

"No, Nola, I want to date you."

My breath paused somewhere in my throat. I didn’t want the moment to move on. I wanted to take the time to sit in that truth. The truth that he wanted to date me. He wanted a relationship with me. I think.

"Wha—what? I thought I was driving you crazy."

He smiled. "I’m pretty sure that’s what happens to anyone who’s ever been attracted to someone else."

He wasn't annoyed at me. He liked me. He'd made the first move. I didn't have to hide my crazy or my attraction to him anymore. "Are we going to do this? I mean, we’re already married. I guess it makes sense that we should date."

He sat down next to me. "I know this is backward, but I’m really hoping you feel the same way about me, and that pretending to be married hasn’t been the most miserable thing in your life."

I batted my eyelashes at him. "Bartholomew, you have such a way with words."

An embarrassed duck of his head only made me want him more.

"Bane, I like you too. And I lied."

He scowled. "What did you lie about?"

"Remember the first day we moved in and I told you I wasn't attracted to you anymore?"

He nodded slowly.

"That was a lie. I was still attracted to you. The more I was around you, the more I wanted to get to know you."

His scowl slowly turned into a big grin as I spoke.

"This is going to be fun."

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

Homeowners Association Rule #16:

Lawns must be mown at an