Love Croakies Sam Cheever (red queen ebook txt) 📖

Before the ogre could wind up again, Sampson leaped onto his back, fangs bared and claws raking the ogre’s thick skin.

The massive claws barely scratched the ogre’s flesh.

“We have to do something,” Lea said in Nina Sampson’s voice.

“You think?” Sebille said. “But what?”

“I’ll blast him,” Lea said, lifting her hands to start weaving a spell. A single spark fizzed at her fingertips and then died. “Hot diggity dangit!” she exclaimed in frustration. “I can’t use magic in this glamour.”

Sebille popped into her sprite form. “I’ll see if I can help.”

I threw out my keeper magic and waited, but nothing came. I frowned. There were certainly artifacts in that place. We’d seen one of them.

“The ogres lock their artifacts down with special earth magic,” Lea-Nina said. She sighed. “Where’s the king when you need him?”

My eyes went wide. “The king!” I said, turning on my heel.

“Where are you going?” Lea yelled after me.

I was running toward the largest archway in the distance. “To see a naked ogre.” He was the closest thing to an ogre king I knew of. Maybe he could help.

“This really isn’t the time, Naida,” she replied.

I couldn’t argue with that. There was really no good time to see a naked ogre. And yet, it seemed I was making a habit of it.

I ran toward the archway I thought was the right one. The meaty sound of flesh striking flesh and the occasional snarl from the shifter dogged my steps. I felt my will lagging as I approached the portal. What if it was the wrong one? Maybe I needed to go through with an ogre, or I’d be fried by magic. What if the naked ogre had dropped something and was bending over to get it when I barged inside?

Ew, ew, ew, ew, ewwwwww!

I shut my thoughts down and forced myself to keep running. “Not good, not good, not good…” I chanted as I ran.

And then suddenly I was there and had no more time to talk myself out of it. I closed my eyes and plunged into the portal before I could change my mind.

As before, the magic enveloped me in a weird, gelatinous embrace that tugged against my skin, slowing down my passage even as I fought to move more quickly through.

Despite feeling that the more I pushed, the slower I went, I managed to shove my way through the portal a beat later. The magic released me with a soft burp of air.

I stumbled a few steps forward, pinwheeling my arms to keep from falling as the uneven rock floor threatened to pitch me onto my face. Digging my heels in, I stopped mere inches away from the enormous throne I remembered.

It was empty.

No, no, no, no! I didn’t have time to search for the wise man or whatever he was. I needed to find the king immediately.

I heard something that sounded like an old woman in sneakers shuffling over a hard floor. Gazing frantically around, I determined that the sound was coming from a passageway behind the throne.

I suddenly realized I had nothing to defend myself with if I was attacked. Would my meager defensive magic work on an ogre? Unlikely.

I was pretty sure the ogres’ bladders could withstand a shot of my defensive magics. Also, having met a few of them already, I figured they’d just view kinky hair as a new fashion statement to be celebrated.

Nevertheless, as the shuffling grew closer, I yanked my magic forward and let it sizzle in my palms.

A beat later, the naked ogre shuffled out of the passage and jerked to a stop, a massive sandwich drooping from his hands and a smear of something that looked like mustard decorating his cheek. He fixed his dark, bead-like eyes on me, surprise turning to delight as he no-doubt recognized me. The wild mop of white hair looked even woolier than the last time, sticking out around his broad face like the aura around a star, and the bulbous red nose twitched above the mustard-glazed lips.

“Argh!” I screamed and covered my eyes.

A deep rumbling sound filled the cavern. I peeked between two fingers as the naked ogre lumbered closer, still clutching his sandwich.

“Hello, Keeper. It’s so nice to see you again.”

I quickly covered my eyes again as he trundled around the throne. “Ah!”

But then I recognized the soft swish of fabric and risked a look. Thank the goddess! He was wearing a purple robe trimmed in white fur. “I need your help. We’re trying to get to a portal because Desiree is trying to steal her brother’s baby and my friend Hobs is dying and I need to save him from Obsession and his brownie is going to die too but your ogre is clubbing my friends to death and I don’t mean clubbing like dancing and drinking fruity drinks…” I pantomimed dancing and drinking in case he didn’t get it and his black eyes sparkled. He swiped a long tongue out and lapped up the mustard and then motioned for me to go on.

“…And this big bald ogre is trying to kill my friends and take the women and the baby well me and my two friends Sebille you met Sebille remember and Le…a…Nina…and we can’t we don’t have time because Hobs is dying did I mention that…” I stuttered to a stop when he held up a mustard-painted hand.

“You wish me to stop my ogre from killing your friends?”

I panted from not breathing and nodded.

Carefully placing the sandwich on the arm of the stone throne, the ogre stood. He patted me on the shoulder with a big hand, practically flinging me to the ground, and started walking me toward the portal.

The sour smell of mustard wafted up to my nose. I looked down, grimacing at the wide stripe of the stuff painting my shirt. “I really appreciate your help,” I said as we plunged into the clutching magic of the portal.

When we popped out on the other side, he said. “It’s my pleasure.” He squeezed