Monster Hunter Bloodlines - eARC Larry Correia (all ebook reader .txt) 📖

Then I saw what Sonya was talking to.

The creature’s back was toward me. It was naked and shaped like a man, but way too skinny. Not just emaciated but dehydrated to the point that all the moisture had been sucked out of the tissues, until all that was left had the consistency of jerky. Bones were visible through gaps in the leathery skin. It was like a body that had been left out in the desert sun to blacken and shrivel, only it was moving around just fine.

I turned back to Trip and mouthed the word undead.

Trip shrugged, like what was he supposed to do with that? Undead was a big catch-all term with a wide variety of capabilities.

I spread my hands like beats me, because I had absolutely no idea what kind it was. It didn’t feel like a vampire. It was obviously intelligent, but that could still be a bunch of things. If it was a revenant we’d be able to put it down with a few bullets and go home. If it was something like a lich, we were in deep shit. So we’d just have to proceed with caution. I peered back around the trailer.

“Last chance, child. Who sent you to kill me?”

“I told you nobody! I mean, somebody sent me, but not to kill you. They told me you were going to give me five million bucks in cash for the stone.”

“I live in a barn because I have to hide from Hunters. I have to pay degenerates to steal bodies from funeral homes to continue my work,” the thing snapped. “Does it look like I’ve got that kind of money?”

“I thought maybe you were laying low.” Sonya was quiet for a moment. The only noise was the creak of the rope holding her up. “Okay, so obviously there’s been a big misunderstanding here. How about you let me free, I’ll take the stone away, and get it out of here? Your secret’s safe with me, Mr. Phipps.”

“That’s Colonel Phipps to you.”

Earl must have caught that exchange. “Aw, hell. It’s Buford Phipps.” And from the way Earl said that, it was bad news. If Earl had covered this particular undead asshole during Newbie training, it must have been on a day I’d fallen asleep during class. I looked back at Trip but he didn’t seem to know either. “Give me one minute to change, then distract him. I’ll take Phipps. You free the girl and run.”

That was not good. That sounded like Earl was going to wolf out on us. He had the control to force a change whenever he wanted, but he rarely did it this far from the full moon, and only if we were dealing with something crazy dangerous. Shit had just gotten real.

The abnormally gaunt form of Phipps was walking around Sonya. He didn’t look like much more than an awkwardly thin zombie, but Earl wouldn’t risk transforming around other Hunters unless it was absolutely necessary. Phipps was appraising Sonya like she was a hanging side of beef. I could see the profile of his face now. There were patches of skin and hair stuck to it, but most of it was bone. It turns out a skull can still look hungry.

“It’s too late for your conniving ways now, girl. You got spirit world blood in you. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a feast like that. I’m going to bleed you slow, because spirit blood has so very many uses in my work. Then I’m going to eat you alive, piece by piece. It’ll hurt more than you can imagine. Or you can tell me who sent you, and I can put you out of your misery quick and clean, no suffering. I promise.”

The undead monstrosity didn’t sound particularly trustworthy as he said that either.

“I don’t know. I swear!”

“That’s fine. I’ll ask again after I eat your hands. We’ve got all the time in the world.” He grabbed her wrist and tugged. Sonya shouted and thrashed. She hit him with her free hand, and from the solid noise it made, even hanging upside down, Sonya packed a right like a heavyweight boxer, but it did nothing to the monster. The rope creaked as he dragged her over to his mouth. Phipp’s jaw hinged open. The jerky skin stretched. The mouth got bigger and bigger until it could have fit Sonya’s whole arm inside.

Earl hadn’t gotten his requested sixty seconds yet, but I couldn’t let Phipps bite her limbs off. “Hey!”

Phipps spun toward me. My boss had asked for a distraction. Figuring that nothing was quite as distracting as a magazine full of silver buckshot to the face, I put the IR targeting laser on the monster’s skull and fired.

So did Milo. Half a second later so did Trip. The monster let go of Sonya and staggered back until he hit the wall. Multiple lasers danced across his body as sparks filled our night vision. Sonya was sent spinning back and forth like a punching bag that had just gotten violently kicked, and I just hoped that none of us plugged her by accident. Milo and Trip’s guns were suppressed, and quiet. Mine was the only one that was loud as hell.

We had probably pumped a pound of silver and lead through Phipps, but as the smoke cleared, he was still standing. Splintered bones immediately fused back together and the dangling bits of jerky sucked back into place. Our projectiles hadn’t accomplished shit.

Buford Phipps roared, “Kill the trespassers!”

Which caused all the many corpses buried in shallow graves around the farm to wake up. Hands erupted through the floor. Bodies that had been hidden on the loft flopped over the edge. Shelves of junk toppled over as the dead rose. Milo yelped as claws grabbed his boot.

The lead monster pointed one bony finger at me, the jawbone moved, and sanity-rending arcane words spilled out. He was casting a spell. Phipps was a lich!

But