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all the air seems to evaporate, choking the breath out of me.

I swear to God, my heart stops beating in my chest. A surge of panic floods my body and my soul. Something isn’t right. Something other than what happened.

My vision blurs, the floor rippling underneath my feet.

“Seth.” A jolt of pain strikes me in the chest when Victoria and my eyes connect. Sadness and misery leaking from every pore in her battered, bruised, and banged-up face. But what flares in them the most is her need for me to hold her.

Yet, I freeze, throat closing off as some kind of awareness I can’t understand grasps hold and carves deep into me. Stabbing me with so much heartache, it’s curling through my veins.

Fuck. Just one more thing to rip me in two. I can feel it already seeping in, ready to destroy.

Slowly Victoria pushes herself up, clutching her stomach and wincing. Alina helps swing her legs around until they are dangling off the side of the hospital bed. Both smile sadly in my direction before Alina squats to retrieve a plastic basin filled with red water. Too much red is in that thing for a woman who’s supposed to be fine.

I look from the water to Victoria. Her lips are quivering so hard. She’s doing everything in her power not to cry.

Shit, what the hell is going on?

Inching forward, when Alina moves out of the way, I gently touch Victoria’s cheek and inspect her black and blue swollen eyes. Her nose is twice the usual size, packed with gauze. There’s no splint, no sign of it being broken, thank God. But the cuts and scrapes peppering all over her perfect face. The fingerprints on her neck send a blast of hatred throughout me, unlike anything I’d experienced before.

I need to force myself to calm down. The last thing Victoria needs is to sense the violence thrumming through my veins.

I take her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

Her body is wound so tight I can feel the fire within dwindling through her palm. I can feel every part of her screaming for a breath. Bringing her hand to my lips, I kiss her knuckles. “Are you okay?” It grates from my throat.

Her throat bobs before she drops her head. Victoria sits silently for a moment. Her fingers clenching mine tight.

“Victoria?” I snap, not meaning for it to come out the way it does, but hell, we’re long past her not talking to me.

“Physically, I am. My shoulder hurts a little. Emotionally, not even close. Oh, God, I can’t let my family see me like this. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” Her voice is a deep rasp. Full of tormenting sorrow, it settles in my bones.

“I’m so sorry,” she says again.

Letting go of my hand, she winds her fingers into my coat and rests her forehead against my stomach, her words pulling my protective side out of me until the only thing I feel is the need to take care of her.

“I’m so sorry,” she repeats again and again, grief-stricken and confusing the fuck out of me. The undeniable sadness in Victoria’s voice rips a hole a mile wide through my chest.

“For what?” My mind spins, trying to grasp what I walked into, when out of the corner of my eye, I see a few towels on the floor. Blood all over them. Did they miss an injury? Did she hurt herself when she hit the ground? No. It’s worse than that. She wouldn’t be apologizing if it wasn’t.

A sob falls from her lips—a sound of her heart shattering. For the first time in a long time, I’m at a loss for words with Victoria.

No idea what to say or what I’m supposed to do.

Finally, after what seems like forever, she glances up at me, those hazel eyes expose too much vulnerability, that unforgettable face scrunching in unbearable suffering. A picture of grief and loss. One who’d suffered before and is doing it again. The same look as she had on her face at the funerals.

I can feel my knees buckling under the weight of her fixed stare, those gorgeous pools releasing tears. Sorrow lances through her expression, and I swear it leaps right out of her and into me.

“I didn’t know. I didn’t know. I would have taken better care of myself if I did. I would have never touched a sip of alcohol. This is my fault.”

“What?” I ask, confused all the more. All I can do is cup her cheek again. Silently telling her, I’ve got her. Through whatever she can’t seem to say to me, I’ve got her.

“What could you possibly be sorry for, angel. You did nothing wrong. The man who hurt you did. Don’t you dare blame yourself for something he did.” Unsure of how much she knows, I slide my hand gently to cup the back of her head, pulling her into me and glancing at Alina.

She gives me a slight nod letting me know they are aware of Maxim and Mikhail.

“Hey, whatever you’re not telling me, we’ll get through it together. I’d walk through fire for you, Victoria. I told you I wasn’t going anywhere. Now fill me in. I’m starting to freak the fuck out here.” This feeling inside me is different than anything I’d ever felt before. And I know, whatever it is, it’s going to annihilate me because it’s killing her.

“I’m going to leave you two alone. The doctor prescribed some pain meds. She took one about fifteen minutes ago. Give or take, I’d say she has about ten minutes before she falls asleep. I’ll get them and meet you in the waiting room.”

Both of us turn toward the sound of Alina’s voice, and I glance between the two of them as they share a silent conversation. A promise that what happened in this room doesn’t go any further.

“I’m trusting you to take care of her, Seth.”

Trust.

It’s not Alina’s I want. However, I appreciate her giving it to me.

“I will. You

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