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whip us up some vittles. We eat twice a week. Sometimes three times if youā€™re lucky. Steamed rat, fried bat, maybe even a boiled toadie frogā€¦ or two. Iā€™ve got ā€˜em stored away. Donā€™t worry; Iā€™ll bring them to you. Hunting day is on Wednesday.ā€

ā€œAre you kidding?ā€ Todd asked. ā€œArenā€™t they diseased? Besides, how would I know what time it is?ā€

Joe grinned. ā€œThereā€™s no disease in here. The Spring of Life keeps everything vital, including the vermin. Anyhow, Iā€™ve got a clock in the mess hall. Iā€™ll walk you over. Itā€™s active when I feel like turning it on, and thatā€™s that. Itā€™s not like time matters for you. I didnā€™t say it was accurate. Youā€™re not going anywhere! Heh-heh.ā€

Todd stopped the overextended laugh. ā€œJoe, that doesnā€™t help matters one bit. Does it? Can you just quit with the teasing and get real with me? Whatā€™s going on, and why am I still here?ā€

ā€œYouā€™re not readyā€¦ not even close. Why donā€™t I just ā€˜mess you aroundā€™ a little more?ā€

ā€œNot ready for what?ā€

ā€œJust forget it.ā€

Todd entered the room and looked around.

Kind of like a medieval version of Oakdale High. Not ready to go back there. Only a few things missing ā€” the clinking from the kitchen, the stressed banter of the underpaid workers, and the unending chatter of the students.

ā€œWhat do you think?ā€ Joe asked. ā€œUp to your standards? Donā€™t let those haughty eyes make you cast judgment on my handiworkā€¦ Donā€™t you dare have a lying tongue either! You know what will happen if you do, right?ā€

ā€œIt looks good,ā€ Todd said. ā€œIā€™ll give you props on this. Reminds me of a trip to Carlsbad I took a few years ago. Never in a million years would you expect a cafeteria to serve cold sandwiches in the middle of the earth. It feels sterile. ā€˜Government-managed,ā€™ but precisely the room for me to get to work on giving you the best doggone fried rat and steamed bat that you can get around theseā€¦ā€

Creeper Joe interrupted, ā€œAh, ah! Youā€™ve gotten it wrong. Itā€™s ā€˜fried batā€™ and ā€˜steamed rat.ā€™ Donā€™t forget about the toadie frogs. Oh, lookie there. You only have seven minutes. You better get cooking. Iā€™ll ring the bell in a bit, and youā€™ll see the others show up faster than a mosquito to a bug zapper.ā€

Joe left the room as Todd explored the kitchen area. He had many utensils at his disposal ā€” forks, knives, wooden spoons, loads of miscellaneous tongs, meat cleavers, whisks, and stainless steel plates. He read signs mounted all over the kitchen.

REMOVAL OF ANY KITCHEN SUPPLIES FROM THIS ROOM WILL LAND YOU on the NORTH SIDE of the TUNNEL in a CELL for MORE TORTURE. DONā€™T TRY YOUR LUCK.

.     .     .     .     .

The large vat nearly spilled over as Todd swirled the bat around the grease and steamed the rat on the skillet. Another pot continued at a rolling boil behind the skillet with fifteen frogs.

The odor of the creatures is a lot more likeable than I could have ever imagined. I must just be that hungry. Iā€™m ready for the day we can serve up that boar.

He finished firing up and cooking the meals for the hungry inhabitants of Level Zero. Shortly thereafter, the bell Creeper Joe mentioned rang. The creepā€™s voice piped through the entire area on the loudspeakers.

ā€œWake up. Wake up, my children. Time for some grub grubs so you can have some chub chubs! Heh-heh.ā€

The unlikely army of transient prisoners began their walk to the mess hall area, lining up single-file just outside the room as their anticipatory chatter remained minimal.

Todd spoke to the group as they approached, ā€œCome on in, you guys. Iā€™ll be serving your meal today.ā€

Harv was at the front of the line and chimed in, ā€œLet me guess, fried bat and steamed rat, right?ā€

Todd smiled, almost welcoming the sarcasm. ā€œRight on the money, Harv. Donā€™t forget about the boiled frogsā€¦ for the select lucky few.ā€

The best way to cope with the struggle is to have fun with it. Itā€™ll help the rest do the same.

After all went through the chow line, Todd prepared his own plate. Once the others sat to eat, he carried his meal into the main seating area. He struggled not to fixate on the sounds of munching and chewing while the forks clinked across the tops of the stainless steel plates. A table of unfamiliar women sat together, but none looked up or acknowledged him.

ā€œWhatā€™s going on, ladies? No love for the chef?ā€

They returned a cold stare in stone silence. Todd turned around and studied a sign on the wall: NO DRINKS IN THE MESS HALL.

He and Livewire made eye contact.

ā€œHey there,ā€ Todd said. ā€œWhatā€™s the word, buddy?ā€

ā€œIā€™m not going to talk to you right now,ā€ Livewire said. ā€œThe mess hall must maintain order at all times.ā€ He pointed to a sign that read the same in red blocked letters on a white backdrop. ā€œJoe will tolerate nothing less. We donā€™t want the sprinklers kicked on. Itā€™s too easy to gossip around here. This is just about the only time that weā€™re all together. We canā€™t be stirrinā€™ up trouble in the community or pourinā€™ out lies like a false witness.ā€

ā€œGossip? About each other? About Creeper Joe? Oh, come on. Are the sprinklers that bad? At least everyone could have a sip of water with dinner, right?ā€

Livewire shook his head. ā€œYouā€™re thinking too casually again, like weā€™re above the surface. What do you think sprinklers full of bleach can do?ā€

ā€œBurn skin and poison food?ā€

ā€œYou got it. One of many demented ways to keep us from rallyinā€™ together and rebellinā€™ against what weā€™re governed by. The poisonā€™s never enough to kill us, but itā€™ll do a good bit of harm to your innards. Youā€™ll be begginā€™ for a trip to the Spring of Life.ā€

ā€œWhich is? What are we governed by?ā€

ā€œI canā€™t answer that. These guys are old-fashioned. If the women even utter as much as a peep in here, they get accused of gossipinā€™.

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