TONY: Slow Burn (Raging Fire Book 1) Kallypso Masters (short books for teens .txt) 📖

shiny copper-bottomed pots and pans hanging above the cooking island, and a wall of windows that must bring a lot of light in during the daytime for whoever was on kitchen duty. “I should send a photo to Angelina. She’d be green with envy.”

Only he wasn’t ready for his family to know where he was yet, other than that he was taking some time for himself. Tony turned to face Carm. “I’d love to cook for you, to make up for crashing your villa like this.”

“Be careful what you offer, because I might take you up on that—but only because you find cooking enjoyable. I don’t want you in the kitchen all week, though. You’re on vacation too. And there are some amazing restaurants on the island.”

She gave him a half-smile. “I’m sure we can find other ways for you to compensate me.” Carm waggled her eyebrows and her enigmatic smile left him wondering if she meant what he thought she was saying. No, most likely he was reading into it what he wanted to hear.

There was one thing he needed to reiterate first. “I’m paying for half the rental cost, which is only fair.”

“We can discuss it later.” She waved away his words and poured him a drink then sprinkled the surface with a couple shakes of nutmeg before handing him the glass.

Tony took a seat at the bar and held up his glass to the light. “What are we drinking?”

Carm took the stool nearest him. “Painkillers.”

“I hope there isn’t anything serious you’re escaping from back home.” Like I am.

“Oh, not at all!” Carm held her glass up for a toast, not elaborating any further. “To a week of calm seas and incredible dives.”

He clinked his glass to hers and took a sip. The seemingly innocuous liquid packed quite a punch. “How much booze is in this thing?”

She laughed. “Enough to kill the pain, I suppose, if it’s going to live up to its name.”

Tony preferred that she remain sober and aware of her surroundings for safety reasons, but also because, if any mutual sparks flew between them this week, he wanted her to be able to consent and to leave this island without regrets about whatever they might do together.

After another long swallow, she set her glass on the countertop and became suddenly serious. Her moods were all over the place tonight.

“I’m going to share something with you that only one other person knows about.”

Whoa. Shit was getting deep, fast.

Chapter Twenty-Two

Tony wasn’t sure he was ready for a heavy conversation their first hours together on vacation, but he was the interloper here. Carm would call the shots for how they spent this week together.

She drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly as she ran her index finger down the condensation on her glass. “The first time I came to the Caribbean, I was a sophomore in college. My roommate and I went to the Bahamas.” She drew a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Late that first night, while drinking Painkillers,” she pointed toward the pitcher, “I suddenly started to sob. I hadn’t dealt with Gino’s death years earlier. Not at all.” A shimmer lit her eyes.

At a loss for words, Tony stroked the top of her forearm. “I can’t imagine losing a sibling.” In their chosen line of work, any of his blood brothers could be ripped away from him at any moment, as well as his brothers at the station. It wasn’t something Tony dwelled on actually happening. He wouldn’t be able to function if he did.

But Carm had lost her oldest brother while he served in Afghanistan. “That had to have been devastating. How old were you when he was killed?”

She met his gaze. “Just turned seventeen. And it was beyond devastating. Hardest for my parents and Marc, of course, but Sandro and I were gutted as well.” She broke contact with his hand when she lifted her glass to her lips and downed half of its contents before continuing. “Rather than deal with it, I forced all my anger and pain down and spent most of the time in the two-and-a-half years that followed comforting everyone else in the family. I suppose I wanted to prove how strong I was by not breaking down, especially around Mama who wasn’t coping well, but that just led to a lot of repressed emotions. And they came out with a vengeance that night in Nassau.”

Tony placed his hand on her arm again, squeezing reassuringly. He wanted to help ground her in the present as she revisited the pain of losing her big brother. The image of Carm suffering in silence, hiding her own hurt while helping everyone else in the family, broke his heart. He wished he could have been there for her, even though he didn’t even know her back then.

Tony waited for her to continue. When she didn’t, he kept his questions to himself, not one to poke his nose into other people’s business. Maybe she wanted to keep the rest private. Marc didn’t talk about Gino on their shifts, either—and firefighters shared just about everything while sitting around the station. Marc and Gino had been the closest in age and probably had a relationship similar to Rafe and Franco’s as the two oldest brothers in the family.

Tony took a sip, the liquor burning a hole in his almost-empty stomach. He probably should ask for some chips or something to soak it up but didn’t want to interrupt this moment. Both of them shared the bond of suffering significant losses in their families.

After another sip of her own, Carm continued. “It has taken me years since that meltdown, including almost a year of therapy, to come to terms with my anger.”

“Anger?”

She nodded. “At the military, at the 9/11 insurgents who spurred him to join the Marines, at the world for being so screwed up.” She grew silent, sliding her thumb up and down in the condensation on the side