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me with these two beautiful ladies. Amen.” He looks at me with so much emotions in his eyes, before he starts filling his plate with everything. I take a deep breath and say a prayer in my head asking God to please help me with my feelings, because I’m not sure if it’s possible to love two people the same time. I reach to grab myself an eggroll the same time he does and I feel a little tingle in my fingers as our hands brush against each other. I look to see if he felt what I just felt and see that he’s smiling that same smile he’s had for me since we first met. Fuck my life.

We clean up and decide to watch a movie before Emma goes to bed. We settle on West Side Story because it’s one of Emma’s favorite movies, but she falls asleep before it finishes. I try to move her, but Marino beats me to it, “I got her Babe, just relax.”

I give Emma's head a kiss, “Night babygirl. Mama loves you.” And Marino carries her to her room. I get up to use the bathroom when my phone starts going off. I reach for it and see that it’s my sister calling.

“Hello.”

“Hey Sis, are you busy?” she asks.

“No, I was just going to the bathroom” I say.

I hear her breathing heavily and before I can ask what’s wrong she says; “I’m calling to tell you that you need to come home right now.” She starts to cry and I grip my phone tighter,

“What’s going on Megan? Is Mama okay?”

She sobs and says, “Mama’s fine. I’ll fill you in when you get here, but you have to come home now.”

I end the call and head for the bedroom to pack a bag.

“What’s wrong Babe?” Marino asks as he comes out of Emma’s room.

I look at him with worry etched into my face and say, “We need to go home right now. My sister just called me crying and said I had to come home but she won't tell me why.”

“Is your mother okay?”, he asks.

“Yeah, Mama’s fine. She said she’d fill me in when I get there. So I don’t know what’s going on.”

He grabs me gently by the waist and says, “Breathe babe, please breathe.” I wrap my arms around his neck and do as he asks. “You go start packing and I’ll book our tickets okay? It’ll be okay? I just need you to keep breathing for me.”

I take another deep lungful of air and say, “Thank you for taking care of us.” He smiles and leans in to kiss my forehead.

“Now go pack so we can leave” he says.

I don’t know what’s going on and I’m scared to find out what it is that had Megan sounding so upset. And I am definitely not ready to head back home yet, because I have been keeping a secret from everyone. The only ones who know are Emma and Marino. I close my eyes and say a little prayer of my own;

“God, if you can hear me now, all I ask is that you don’t let go of my hand. Amen.”

I take another breath and hope that whatever news that is waiting for me back home isn’t anything life changing. Because I don’t think I can handle another heartbreak.

Chapter Thirty-Three

Eli

It’s been five months since she flew back to New York. Five months since I’ve seen her or heard her voice. It’s been five months since I felt her heart beat and I fucking missed her. My heart fucking ached for her. I kept myself busy with work, helping Mama with anything she needed doing, and kept myself busy with Becca and our baby. She was almost six months pregnant, and her belly was showing big time. Becca and I have gotten closer since we found out she was having our baby. I had her move in with me because she wasn’t coping well on her own and it meant I didn’t have to worry about her. The trauma of my past with Chrissy meant I needed to know Becca was doing okay. She’s changed a lot since she found out she was expecting. I didn’t think she was going to be any different, but I was wrong. She’s easier to be around and fun to be with. She isn’t the evil bitch that she was before, and I owe it all to my baby that’s growing in her belly.

Mama still isn’t a big fan, but she respects Becca because she’s having her grandchild. I know Mama wishes it was Sina because I overheard her when she was on the phone talking to Rita. I had to tell Mama that Becca wasn’t a bad person, she just needed direction. Becca and I have dinner with Mama every Sunday now and Mama even stepped up by spending more time with her. Becca knew Mama’s feelings and she respected them. I even volunteered to help out at Pixie’s so I could spend more of my time with Reese and Lei. We make sure to have family dinners every other day. Reese doesn’t have a soft spot for Becca, but he is nice to her out of respect for me.

Lei still doesn’t like her. I don’t expect her to be best friends with Becca, because I know her loyalty is with Sina and I’m not mad at her for that. There are times when Lei is on her phone with Sina, but she never shares what they talk about. I mean it bothers the fuck out of me, but it’s none of my business. Reese only mentions Sina when we’re at the Hut having drinks with the guys. Speaking of the guys, we’ve gotten closer since their family gathering. The guys always make sure to invite Mama and I over for family cookouts or dinner.

Mama and Miss Rita have gotten close as well, and it makes me happy that

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