The Heretic Wind: The Life of Mary Tudor, Queen of England Judith Arnopp (best books to read in your 20s .txt) 📖

“What you meanis that I should take Philip of Spain, isn’t it?”

She crossesher hands on her bosom.

“Yes, YourMajesty. You are half Spanish yourself so it would not be like marrying aforeigner, and he is kin too. A perfect match, I’d say. Think how it would havepleased your mother.”

My motheralways favoured a match with Spain. She was furious when my betrothal toCharles came to nothing.

“Philip isyounger than I, yet not too young. Some of the names put forward by theImperial Ambassador have been young enough to be my sons.”

“They say heis handsome.”

“I wasbetrothed to his father once, when I was an infant. There may be an impediment.”

“Surely not, YourMajesty. Who else has been suggested? Dom Louis? Are you considering him?”

“I’mconsidering them all, as the council suggests. Many of them are suitors of old.It seems I am more desirable now I am queen than when I was a princess ofnebulous status.”

“You canhardly blame them, Your Majesty. Your position was always so uncertain before.”

“How gallantof them…”

“Perhaps you’dprefer an Englishman?”

“Hmm, the listis most unprepossessing. They’ve even suggested Reginald Pole.”

“The Cardinal?”Her brows shoot upward. “Is that … permissible?”

“In theory. Hehas never been ordained into the priesthood but he is far too … forthright, alittle too earnest for me. I fear we would clash most horribly.”

“Edward Courtenaythen?” She gets up and brings a tray of victuals closer, and then taking herseat again, she picks up her sewing.

“He is thefavourite of those who prefer an English match.”

“But not thosewho mistrust his Plantagenet blood.”

“Well, thereis that but … he is peculiar. The years in the Tower have taught him nomanners.”

Courtenay,another cousin of mine, has spent most of his life in the Tower, since hisfamily were attainted after the Exeter conspiracy in my father’s day. When Iascended the throne, I was glad to offer him liberty and restore his title andhonours at court. But, while I deeply pity the life he has led thus far, Icannot reconcile myself to the idea of marrying him. His royal blood makes hima good match, as does his faith and age, but his sudden liberty has gone to hishead and I’ve heard he favours a dissolute life. I pull a face.

“If he behavesso badly at court, imagine what he might descend to in his private life.Imagine what he might subject a wife to…”

I catch Susan’seye, our imaginations romp along a similar path and we both dissolve into laughter.Ruefully, I shake my head and let the list fall to the floor.

“Oh, Susan, Iam bored to death with talk of marriage. Summon the other women and let us havea game of cards or something. There is an hour or more before bed.”

After muchheart searching, I decide to marry Philip of Spain and all hell breaks out inthe council chamber. Gardiner, Rochester, Englefield and Waldegrave insist Ishould make an English match.

“The Englishhate foreigners!” Gardiner exclaims. “There could be war with France over this!Your Majesty will be happier and more secure with Courtenay…”

“Don’t be sodramatic.” Paget stands up, waving a sheaf of paper. I close my eyes and lettheir wrath wash over me. They are all fools. When I stand up and face them, Ido not speak at once but wait as their argument slowly disintegrates. One byone they turn toward me.

“Thank you,” Isay when silence has resumed. “I have given this matter much thought, consideredall things, pondered upon every one of your opinions. The matter of marriage isa personal one, or it should be. Although matrimony was contrary to my owninclination, my sources tell me that Philip is a kindly man who will ever showme consideration, and observe the conditions that shall be put in place tosafeguard the welfare of this country. God has performed many miracles for meof late and now, he offers me a husband; a husband who will love me perfectlyand never give me cause for jealousy. Therefore, gentlemen, can you not just beglad?”

I watch themwag their heads and scratch their beards. Their arguments die unheard for theyhave the good sense to heed my wishes. When we turn our attention to othermatters, I find it difficult to concentrate. I am to be married and while mostwomen welcome a union and the promise of children, I only fear it.

 St James’ Palace – November 1558

“Whydid you fear it, Your Majesty?”

I turn toward the sound of hervoice, her guileless question reminding me of her youth. She knows nothing oflife, or marriage, or what is expected of us. Nothing at all.

The shutters are drawn, I amunsure if it is evening or early morning. These last weeks the hours seem to mergeone into the other until time is both endless and static.

“On my wedding day, I wasapproaching thirty-eight years old and knew nothing of men. Philip was nigh onten years younger than I, and had been married before. She, Maria Manuela, diedin childbed. I imagined he’d adored her and I hated being second best. I neededhim to love me. Our marriage was one of arrangement. We’d never set eyes on oneanother, yet I was expected to share his bed, and allow him to look upon mynakedness.”

The child makes a smallembarrassed sound and I reach out for her hand before I continue.

“What I couldn’t work out washow to maintain my queenship, shall we call it, while suffering theindignity of consummating our marriage.”

“Oh, I see,” she says in asmall, tight voice. She doesn’t see at all, of course. No woman can imagine therealities of the marital bed until they’ve experienced it. It was terrifying tome at the time, and I never found joy in it. Evidently, passion was not in mynature. I found more excitement in my dogs and horses than I ever did withPhilip. Perhaps it was him. I’d no gauge with which to judge him by, whereas he… not only had he been wed before, but half the whores of Europe had been athis disposal.

There is more I’d like to sayon this subject but, taking pity on Anne, I sway the conversation and spare herblushes.

“Anyway, child, I am gettingahead of myself. Before we could marry