Catfishing on CatNet Naomi Kritzer (reading strategies book txt) š
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- Author: Naomi Kritzer
Book online Ā«Catfishing on CatNet Naomi Kritzer (reading strategies book txt) šĀ». Author Naomi Kritzer
I wonder if Rachel would like CatNet. Would the admins let her count animal drawings as animal pictures? She draws really well. I open up the site and look to see which of the assistant administrators is online. Alice, the teenage girl admin, has a little green light by her name. āHey, Alice, do you have a minute?ā I type.
āYes, I do, LBB,ā she says. āWhat can I help you with?ā
āI was wondering if I could have an invite for a friend.ā
āIs this someone you know in person or online? Whatās her name?ā
āHer name is Rachel, and sheās in my art class at school. She draws really cool pictures. That was my other questionācould she upload her drawings instead of photos of animals? Would that be okay?ā
āIt would depend on how good the drawings were,ā Alice says. āHow well do you know her?ā
āNot all that well.ā Not well at all, actually. āIād like to get to know her better.ā
āI tell you whatāfind out her last name and her email address, and Iāll see about sending her an invite.ā
I feel a flush of uncertainty. I like Rachel. I want her to be on CatNet so I can stay friends with her after I move. But what if Rachel takes one look at CatNet and decides Iām a loser? It doesnāt matter, I tell myself. Weāre leaving either way. Sooner or later.
āOkay,ā I type.
āHowās the new town?ā Alice asks.
āI guess Iād sum it up with, āTheyāre going to have a robot teach us sex ed because they donāt trust the human teachers not to go off-script.ā Rachel seems cool, though.ā
āGood luck,ā Alice says. āTalk to you again soon.ā
3
Clowder
LittleBrownBat: So hey, I moved again.
Marvin: I donāt know why you canāt ever tell us where you are. I mean even if your dingo fatherās on CatNet heās not going to be in your Clowder.
LittleBrownBat: If I told you where I live and my mom found out, sheād make me stop using social media entirely.
Hermione: Hadnāt school started in your old town?
LittleBrownBat: Itās started in the new one, too. Itās OK. Weāre reading The Scarlet Letter in English class, itāll be great to find out what happens. Again.
Hermione: Oh, that is JUST NOT FAIR.
LittleBrownBat: RIGHT?
Boom Storm: Whatās the weirdest thing so far?
LittleBrownBat: SEX ED TAUGHT BY A ROBOT.
Thatāll start next week
Icosahedron: Why would they have a robot teach sex ed?
Because robots donāt get embarrassed?
Firestar: ooh ooh I know
Because they can make the robot say all the homophobic and transphobic stuff that a real human being might just refuse to say
AM I RIGHT?
LittleBrownBat: Thatās basically what Iām expecting.
Marvin: btw my parents told me today weāre driving to California for Christmas again.
Since we live in North Carolina, this means I will once again spend almost all of winter vacation in the car.
Firestar: Why donāt you fly?
Marvin: Momās afraid of flying.
LittleBrownBat: How far of a drive is it?
CheshireCat: It is approximately 36 hours in total. But I assume you donāt do it all in one session. Right?
Marvin: They always say itāll be three days and itās always four.
Firestar: Wow
Hermione: Wow.
Marvin: If we had a self-driving car, we could take roads where itās legal to let the car drive while you sleep and maybe it would be faster. Except weād still have to stop to pee. And eat.
LittleBrownBat: How many times have you done this?
Marvin: Five. Last year I convinced them to stay home. But Momās sister lives out there and my aunt doesnāt like to fly either.
Hermione: You should meet in the middle!
Unfortunately it looks like thatās Oklahoma
Everyone loses if you go to Oklahoma.
Firestar: Have you even been to Oklahoma Hermione?
Marvin: Seriously sheās right. Iāve driven through Oklahoma five times and it is LAME.
Hermione: omg Marvin donāt say itās LAME, thatās ableist.
Marvin: Sorry, I meant to say itās gay. Totally gay.
Firestar: not funny
Marvin: Okay okay sorry.
Boom Storm: You could say itās naff. Then youāll sound British.
Marvin: How do you know thatās not ableist or homophobic or something else bad?
Hermione: I just looked it up and they donāt know exactly where ānaffā came from, but maybe it came from Polari, which was this secret gay language used in Britain in the 19th century.
Firestar: Hold up. THERE IS A SECRET GAY LANGUAGE?
Hermione: Not anymore. It fell out of use in the 1960s.
Firestar: I WANT TO REVIVE IT. What does naff mean?
Marvin: It means lame
SORRY
It means, āThis sucks, but not enough to bother saying it SUCKS.ā
LittleBrownBat: Oklahoma is definitely naff. The parts Iāve lived in, anyway.
Firestar: What are some other Polari words or do we not know any because itās lost?
Hermione: Corybungus means your butt. Fantabulosa means that somethingās awesome.
Firestar: Okay letās bring those back. Naff, Corybungus, and Fantabulosa.
Marvin: Iām reading through the list of words and I just got to naff.
In addition to meaning super unimpressive it means STRAIGHT. Like HETEROSEXUALLY STRAIGHT.
Firestar: BEST WORD EVER!
4
Steph
Walking to school the next day, I think about getting in trouble.
I had this run in sixth grade where I got in trouble at a bunch of schools in a row. In middle school, other kids start really noticing whatever it is that makes you weird, and there were all sorts of things that made me weird. I never had the right clothes. I never had the right hair. I raised my hand when I wasnāt supposed to and I didnāt raise my hand when I was
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