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had said. “The same thing that’s let me live for five thousand years also makes me unappetizing to insects and parasites of all types. Besides, do you know how many people get bitten by something that got trapped in their clothes every year?”

                “No, how many?” I had asked.

                “No idea.” she called as she climbed higher. “But I can guarantee that it’s higher than zero!”

                To tell the truth, her near-constant nudity made me get used to it a lot quicker than I would have otherwise.

                Gaia, on the other hand, I thought, she seems to have an infinite supply of slinky barely-covering clothes that show her nipples getting hard every time the wind blows. I was finding myself being more easily distracted by her fully clothed… though her definition of ‘fully’ was vastly different than most… than I was by Katsu being totally nude.

                I sat beneath a tree on the side of a clearing, looking up at Gaia finishing installing another camera up near the top of it.  I was reminded, once again, that Fae weren’t big on underwear.

                At least I don’t have to wonder what SHE looks like naked.

                Of course, another thing that separated the two women was the fact that Katsu hadn't expressed even a momentary desire to jump my bones. Gaia, on the other hand, rarely let me forget that the offer was always open.

                I have no idea what that green-skinned angel’s deal is! I thought. She is, without a doubt, the sweetest, most dedicated person I’ve met in forever. And her interest in me feels… like more than just horny-ness.

                But why? That was the question. Her dedication to me seemed to be at eleven from day one, but Fae don’t do ‘life bond at first sight’-type of thing.

                Typical! I thought bitterly. I come halfway around the world to get away from one set of woman troubles only to wind up obsessing about another woman!

                I honestly never thought that becoming a legendary magickal practitioner would resemble a soap opera so much.

                A slight tremor beneath my feet interrupted my train of thought. What the hell? It was still very slight… so much so that nobody else seemed to notice it, not even Jack, who was currently sitting on the ground under the tree that the ladies were working in… but it was growing stronger.

                “Uh, guys?” I called up to Gaia and Katsu. “I think you’d better come down.”

                They were down in an instant, Katsu helping Jack to his feet when she arrived.

                “What’s up?” Gaia asked, but then I saw it on her face.

                “Feel that?” I asked her.

                “What the human hell?” she said.

                “Whatever it is,” Katsu said, “it’s getting closer.”

                Suddenly, a figure came crashing out of the forest. I got ready to defend my friends when I recognized just who it was.

                “Evelyn?” I said, surprised.

                “Hi love!” she said brightly, breathing heavily. “Got some bad news for you… “

                Her brother Trevor came running out of the trees next.

                “Hi gang!” he said, barely slowing down. “Run!”

                We soon saw why. Behind him, several giant, hairy elephants came crashing out of the underbrush, flames shooting out of their mammoth tusks.

                So hellephants are real. Great.

                We took off running, Katsu enchanting her stoned boyfriend so that he would float along with us. We stayed close together as we ran through the dense jungle, occasionally glancing behind us as the massive hell beasts torched whatever they didn’t trample.

                “Doing something about the fire would be nice.” Gaia called out to me.

                “I need to focus,” I said, not breaking stride, “and I can’t do that at full speed!”

                “I’ll distract them.” she called back. “You douse the inferno!”

                I watched as Gaia spun around and threw up a magickal shield between us and the hellephants. The beasts rammed into it, bouncing back and crashing to the forest floor. They were stunned, but I knew that the shield wouldn’t last long.

                I closed my eyes and tried to focus. It wasn’t easy as I heard the barrier shatter and then the sounds of furious battle. I glanced, and saw that Jack had been deposited by Katsu high in a tree, out of range of the rampaging monsters. She then joined Gaia in the fight.

                Jack’s safe for now. Now let’s do my thing.

                I closed my eyes again and instantly tapped into the water in both my body and in the earth.  I reached upwards…

                The peal of thunder I heard was music to my ears. The skies opened up, and the smoldering path of destruction was soon soaked by the rain.

                Good! Now for the…

                I heard a roar, and the three hellephants reared up. Their flaming tusks were dark, with the only thing coming out of them being…

                Steam. Shit!

                Gaia narrowly avoided a jet of super-heated steam as Katsu levitated Jack again for us to beat a hasty retreat.

                Evelyn, who I had temporarily forgotten about, poked her head back out of the jungle. “This way!” she yelled, and we followed her into the forest.

                We moved fast, but the hellephants moved just as quickly. Just when it sounded like they were gaining, a patch of the ground ahead of us popped up revealing a trapdoor. Trevor was there, hurriedly waving us in.

                “In here!” he yelled.

                We rushed past him through the door and into the passage behind it. He pulled the trapdoor closed just as the bests caught up with us.

                Wham! The impact of the charging animals shook the walls of the passageway and knocked Trevor several feet away, landing on his bottom indignantly.

                “Don’t worry, the door will hold.” Evelyn said, breathing hard.

                We were all out of breath, even Gaia and Katsu. As I caught mine, I looked down the passageway leading away from the door we just entered through. A single row of sparse light bulbs created pools of light every twenty feet

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