The Secret Recipe for Moving On Karen Bischer (read my book .txt) 📖

know, I’ve been the center of some, uh, hot gossip this year. I think a lot of us have been, actually. So let me do this in a way you may understand: Which senior is neither a cold fish nor slutting it up? She’s a weather nerd who likes tacos and lilacs and just wanted to fly under the radar when she transferred here. She may have stuck it out in the wrong relationship just to keep it that way. The irony, then, is that relationship basically shoved her into the spotlight.”

I can’t help but shoot an exasperated look to the camera then, and I hear people in the studio and the nearby classrooms laugh. It’s all I need to keep going.

“But losing that relationship forced her to take a different approach to things. She still prefers to stay under the radar, but she’s now better at being in the spotlight. She used to be afraid to speak her mind, but now she can … for the most part. She wouldn’t have had the guts to do this three months ago and she thanks the friends she’s made for helping her get to this point, the friends who have accepted her as she is: Isaiah, A.J., and Alisha, you’re the best.” At the other end of the table, Alisha clutches a hand to her heart and mouths “Aww,” at me.

I smile before swallowing hard and forcing myself to stare directly into the camera. “She is also as flawed as anyone else. Like, when she snaps at her home ec group because she’s taken a class assignment way, way, way too seriously in the name of proving something that never really needed to be proved—I’m beyond sorry, guys. Or when she finds out she’s been incredibly wrong about something for a very long time. And she really wants to tell Luke Burke that she really likes him, that she’s sorry more than she can say, and that she hopes he saves her a dance tonight. And she doesn’t care who knows it.”

There’s a collective “ooooooh” and wolf whistles that erupt from the classrooms by the TV studio.

“Anyway, that’s all I wanted to say.”

I glance back sheepishly at Mia and Chris, who are staring at me with their mouths hanging open. “Back to you, Mia and Chris!”

They carry on with the broadcast as if what I just did was totally normal, but Willow’s eyes are bugging out of her head from behind the camera as she mouths an exaggerated “Oh my god” at me.

I quietly wait for the broadcast to end, and the second we’re clear, I practically sprint toward my backpack to grab my phone and hit send on the email to Luke. Alisha jumps out in front of me, her face giddy. “I knew you were into Luke! Why didn’t you say anything?”

I grin widely. “I just did, didn’t I?”

She laughs. Willow joins us and pokes me in the arm. “I’m shocked it took you as long as this. It was obvious back in that interview you did with him.”

“Well, uh, we kind of started seeing each other in secret after the party…”

“Since the party?” Willow says, her eyes huge. “Jesus, I need to give Luke crap. I saw him at Target a couple days after the party and I was like, ‘Are you and Ellie secretly dating or something?’ and he was like ‘That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever heard.’”

“Well, it wasn’t really a lie because we broke up pretty soon after. I got mad at him and it ended up that I was totally wrong.”

I must look distraught because Alisha squeezes my elbow. “He’ll forgive you. I know he will.”

“For real,” Willow says. “That boy is cuh-razy for you. It’s all over his face.”

Their optimism buoys me for a bit, but then I check my phone. Nothing.

I’m on edge the rest of the day, to the point I’m glad for the early dismissal because my concentration is nonexistent. By the time we’re released at noon, with no texts or in-person appearances from Luke, I’m ready to sink into the nearest crevice for the next decade or six.

“I bet he just wants to talk to you in person tonight,” Alisha says as we walk out of school together.

I offer a weak smile and pray I don’t start crying. “We’ll see.”

I can’t break down because I have to focus on my third agenda for today: Make it up to my home ec group that we have to be at the dance tonight. My plan is kind of complex and will require every bit of concentration. I’ve already reached out to Mrs. Sanchez on the matter and she’s agreed to help me, so at least there’s that.

It would just be whole lot easier to concentrate if Luke were speaking to me.

CHAPTER 28

“Are you sure about this?”

Mrs. Sanchez is looking at me with what I think is a mixture of admiration and “this girl is completely nuts.”

“I’m pretty good at multitasking,” I say with a shrug. That’s a total lie, but I at least need to try. If I don’t, I might burst into tears over not hearing from Luke.

She consults her phone. “Well, your shift doesn’t start until nine thirty, so you have a good two and a half hours to finish.”

“Oh, it won’t take that long,” I assure her. “Thank you again for opening the classroom for me.”

Mrs. Sanchez opens her mouth, like she’s about to say something, then stops herself and smiles. “You’re welcome. And good luck to you. I’m sure your group members will be very pleased to have a decent meal in their stomachs before your shift begins.”

“I hope so,” I say. And I also hope it helps to make them forgive me.

When Mrs. Sanchez exits the home ec room, I dash to my kitchen and throw open the refrigerator and study the contents inside. Mrs. Sanchez is completely right to be doubtful of my abilities, because I have two hours to cook five side dishes.