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aren’t good at it and they haven’t been off the island since we secured it. They would be butchered if I sent them into danger. That’s if they would even go. Which I doubt. I don’t have absolute power over these people, I’m good at organizing things. I have my lists, I know what we need and I make sure we get it. When I can.”

“But sometimes you can’t.” Jessie said for him.

“Exactly.”

“But you’d be happy to risk my life if it keeps your dozen safe.”

“They would go with you.” Miles said hurriedly. “I wouldn’t dream of sending you in alone. I need someone to lead them. Someone who is experienced. Someone who knows how to fight. Someone who could keep them safe and bring them back. Someone like you.”

“I appreciate the vote of confidence.” Jessie said and stood. “But I’m on a timeline, I have something I need to finish. Can’t you get some of the other towns to help?”

Miles stood quickly, urgency in his voice.

“No.” he said. “This isn’t like the Midwest. There are a few settlements, sure, but they won’t help. They won’t risk their fighters. There aren’t empty ghost towns here that are ripe for the plunder. We were crowded on Z day. Thousands, hell tens of thousands of those things are in every town. They wander in and never leave and what we need we haven’t found in any of the houses. We need to get to a hospital.”

“And how am I supposed to do that?” Jessie asked

“We’ve been working on a plan.” Miles said.

“Hard pass.” Jessie said and walked out.

40

Choices

Dammit, dammit, dammit. Jessie thought as he left the building and looked up and down the street for Natty and her tour guide. Miles probably wouldn’t let him leave her now, he would want a trade. Go kill a thousand undead, bring back truckloads of stuff and we’ll feed and house her for a week. Nope. He had things to do. He’d find a safe place to stash her, leave her with plenty of food, water and ammo and pick her up a few days later. A week at the most.

He saw them as they came out of the clinic and motioned for her to hurry up but she turned to say something to a nurse. He closed his eyes in frustration. Life was so much easier with Bob. He wanted to go. Get off this island. Leave these people and their troubles behind. He couldn’t save the world, couldn’t fix everybody’s problems and he didn’t want to try anymore.

“Let’s go.” He said when she finally neared the car.

“But they need help.” She said “Didn’t he tell you?”

“Yeah. He told me. It’s impossible. They can wait until winter and go in when the dead are frozen.”

“That’ll be too late.” She explained patiently. Jessie just didn’t understand. When he did, of course he would help them.

“They need penicillin. Have you been in the clinic? A bottle of pills could save at least two people, ones just a baby. The nurse needs medical thread, she’s sewing up wounds with regular thread and it usually gets infected. Come on, I’ll show you.” She said and reached for his hand.

“I don’t want to see.” He snapped in anger. “I want to get the hell out of here.”

She looked hurt, she’d never seen him mad before. Grumpy and moody, sure, but he was genuinely pissed off. The sidewalks started quietly filling with people coming out from buildings. The nurse watched the exchange as the First Sergeant limped out and the patrol they’d met that morning led their horses in. Others watched silently. Farmers and mechanics. Men and women and children.

“But they’re sick.” She tried again. “And we’re a good team. We can do it.”

“Look, Natalie.” Jessie spat, his voice hard with anger. “Everybody has problems. Everybody needs something. They’ll bleed you dry and use you up if you let them. In the end you’ll have nothing.”

“Am I using you up?” She asked in a small voice. “Am I bleeding you dry?”

The anger suddenly left him and was replaced with loathing at what he’d become.

“I know you need the Mona Lisa.” She said quietly so the others couldn’t hear. “I know you think it will help you stop thinking about Maddy. Maybe help you with the nightmares but...”

“What do you know of Maddy?” Jessie asked in surprise. He’d never mentioned her to anyone.

“She’s the one you dream about, isn’t she? You say her name sometimes.”

No. Jessie thought. I dream of Scarlet. I dream of her smile, not Maddy’s.

But he didn’t know for sure. He rarely remembered what his dreams were about, only that sometimes he woke up with a scream on his lips.”

“I think I can help them.” She continued, almost whispering. “You have taught me much, Jessie. I am good with my guns; my armor is strong and you say I am brave. You saved my life and I can help to save others. It is only right.”

Jessie stared down into her intense brown eyes and knew she believed what she was saying. She would lead a dozen fighters into a town filled with the undead and they would be overrun. It would be like Scarlet being overwhelmed in the alley behind the optometrist. She fought like a demon, like the Queen of the Cats, but she still got bit. With hordes of that size, there are no avenues of escape and too many to fight no matter how good you were.

“I dream about Scarlet.” Jessie said, his mind pinballing across the years, trying to remember. Was it her or Maddy that had a habit of twisting her lips into a small half smile? Whose lips had he been dreaming of kissing?

“Okay.” Natalie answered, a little puzzled. She had no idea who Scarlet was.

“You can’t take a team into a hospital.” Jessie said. “It’s suicide. Even retrievers won’t do that.”

“I have to do something.” Natty said. “I can’t turn away from what I saw in the clinic.

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