We Will Rise: An Adrian's Undead Diary Novel (Lockey vs the Apocalypse Book 2) Carl Meadows (red queen ebook txt) 📖

hope. Erin is already filled with such light, it makes her unsuitable for the greatest test, but that doesn’t mean she isn’t important in her own way.” She sighed. “But our Trinity is broken and divided Nate, scattered far and wide, and we don’t know how long it will be until they are united. We can’t see them, here on this side of the veil. They are too far from us, so we cluster around Erin.”

“So why is she special?”

“If there is anything left of humanity to be saved, our Soul must survive their crucible and our Trinity unite. Until such events occur, the fight continues, and there need to be those who hold the line for them, bright flames that push back at the darkness as a beacon of hope for others. There must be sanctuaries to shelter survivors, there must be those willing to show the powers that have brought this down upon us that we are worth saving. We can’t wait for the Soul to fail or succeed, or we’ll perish for sure. So, we have to continue fighting, and gather around those flaming torches of light and hope while our Trinity endures their crucible.”

“And Erin is such a flame?” he whispered.

Freya simply graced him with a gentle smile of confirmation.

“But she can’t do it on her own, Nate. As I said, everything is always in threes. She’s fearless and emotional, with the heart the size of a mountain, but it makes her vulnerable. She needs you, Nate. You’re her anchor, the strongest link in her chain that prevents her being swept away in the storm of everything she fights against. She is the Flame, but you are her Shield, and she is your redemption.”

 “My… redemption?” Nate shivered.

Freya’s expression softened as she turned back to him, aching in its compassion. She knew, he realised with dread. Freya knew.

“You’re her armour, Nate,” she said, her voice as soft as a petal. “Her shining defence against the darkness that will shield her from all that seek to extinguish her light. But in turn, that same light can burn away all the guilt and shadow that you carry from your life of violence and regrets. Nate, she’s already brought some meaning - some purpose - back to a life you thought empty of such hope, but now comes the hardest part of your task. You will always protect her, teach her, shield her, and support her. That’s who you are. But for her cleansing fire to burn away the last of your darkness, she needs one thing from you, and that is the hardest thing to give.”

“And that is?” he asked in a tremulous voice. He already knew what Freya would say.

“The truth.” Freya placed both her soft hands upon his. “Nate, you have to take her home.”

Nate’s hands went to his face so Freya would not see his silent tears. They were rough hands that had brought so much death, so much violence, to a world already overflowing with it. But for all his courage in battle, for the countless enemies of evil intent he had fought and killed, for all the innocent lives his actions had doubtless saved, this was the one truth he was terrified to face.

His greatest failing. His greatest betrayal.

His cowardice.

“I don’t know if I can, Freya,” he whispered, the memories breaking free of their shackles, deep in the darkest part of his soul where they lay caged. “If I take her home, she’ll know I’m not the man she thinks I am.” He looked at her through reddened eyes, the tears burning like liquid fire. “The person Erin sees, the way she talks to me, the way she’s always there no matter what, the way she looks at me, like a daughter looks at a loving father… but if she knows the truth?” Nate shook his head. “I don’t think I could bear to lose that, Freya. The Nate that she sees?” He drew in a shaking breath. “I like that version of myself. He has purpose, doesn’t desert those who need him, because she won’t let that Nate get away with it. But if she knows the truth? If that look turns away from me?” He felt breathless, despair threatening to crush the last of the air from his lungs. “Freya, that might break me.”

This place, this dream garden of his old home from a happier time, had cracked his armour. The peace of Maggie’s lovingly tended garden had seeped into all the flaws of his emotional walls constructed over the years, and Freya’s serene compassion was driving deeper into those cracks. Nate Carter was not a man given to open displays of emotion, but here in this dream garden, he was defenceless.

They sat quietly for a moment as Nate gathered himself, sucking in great breaths, his throat tight and painful as an emptiness expanded in his chest. That swelling void was a vacuum of fear and despair, but it was soothed by Freya’s tenderness.

“The truth always finds a way, Nate,” she murmured, her voice like a whispering breeze into the silence. “Secrets can be poison, even if only to yourself, and this wound you carry is toxic. You can shut out the truth like you can the sun, but it will never really go away. It will still be there when you venture outside.”

“She’ll hate me, Freya.” Misery hung from every word. “How can she not?”

“Take that which is your greatest weakness and let it become your greatest strength. She will find out eventually, and then she will wonder why you didn’t think she was worthy of this truth, given the significance of it.”

Freya lowered her head and placed the tips of two soft fingers beneath his chin, tilting his head up and forcing him to meet her dark eyes.

“She has you on a pedestal Nate, and the fall from there would be much harder than choosing to step down from it. Tell her your story, make yourself vulnerable, let her see