Harbor John Lindqvist (grave mercy TXT) 📖

village, feeling slightly protected by the pale street lamps. Only when he had passed the hostel did he allow his thoughts to come belching out. A cloud of horrible, incomprehensible pictures filled his head, and suddenly he felt as if he had a temperature of forty degrees. His body lost all stability and he just wanted to let himself fall. Down on to the track, down into the darkness. To rest.

However, he managed to whip himself on to the point where the track split in two, and headed off to the left. The slight slope down towards Anna-Greta’s house meant that he could simply roll along, his legs dangling. As he wobbled on to the drive leading to the house, he saw that there was still a light in the kitchen window.

He dropped the bike on the grass and dragged himself to the door, his legs heavy. He was sweating and shivering, managed to miss the handle once before he grabbed it and pulled open the door.

Simon and Anna-Greta were sitting at the kitchen table, bent over a whole lot of photographs spread all over the surface. When Simon saw Anders his face lit up for a moment, then his expression changed to one of horror.

‘Anders, whatever have you done?’

Anders leaned against the stove and waved in the direction of Kattudden, but no sound emerged from his lips. Simon and Anna-Greta reached him and he let his body fall into their arms, let himself sink down on to the rag rug. When he was lying on his back and had taken a couple of breaths he said; ‘Just need to…have a little rest.’

He stayed where he was while the kitchen lamp was lit, while Simon and Anna-Greta fetched water and placed a pillow under his head. By this stage the shivering had stopped and he might possibly have been able to get up, but he stayed where he was and let them take care of him, just because it was so utterly blissful to leave everything to someone else for a while.

They took off his trousers and washed the cuts on his legs, dressed them with compresses and gauze bandages. Simon gave him two painkillers and some more water. After a couple of minutes of drifting blissfully in the care of others, Anders hauled himself up on to a kitchen chair. He tried to gather his thoughts and looked at the photographs, spread out across the table.

They were old photographs, very old. They showed houses and farms, people working, close-ups. Many of them were yellow with age, and the people in them wore that expression of grim concentration that is so common in old pictures, as if the very act of being photographed demanded a special effort.

Directly in front of him lay a close-up that made him give a start. It was taken outdoors, and printed on something that looked like matt card. Across the picture ran a couple of flames of patchy yellow, as ifsomeone had splashed urine over it. The picture showed a woman of about sixty, staring angrily into the camera.

‘Yes,’ said Simon. ‘I thought I recognised her.’

On the table in front of him Anders found another picture of the same woman, this time taken from further away. She was standing in front of a scrubby little house on a headland.

‘Who is she?’ asked Anders.

Anna-Greta came to stand behind him, and pointed. ‘Her name was Elsa Persson, and she was a cousin of Holger’s father. She used to live in that house. On Kattudden. Until Holger’s father sold the lot. She was evicted and the house was torn down. Then the summer visitors came.’

‘It was your great-grandfather who took the pictures,’ said Simon. ‘Torgny. He took photographs of all the houses on the island, according to Anna-Greta. I like to sit and look at them from time to time. That’s why I recognised her.’

The stubby chin, the flat nose, the deep-set eyes and the thin lips. The woman in the photograph was the image of Elin as she looked now. Or rather, Elin was a somewhat clumsily executed image of the woman in the photo. All the details weren’t there yet, but just as it’s obvious that a cheap plastic mask of George Bush is meant to represent him and no one else, it was obvious that…

…that this is the woman Elin is meant to look like.

Anders pointed to the house behind the woman. He recognised the location, the position of the island of Kattholmen in the background, but still he asked, ‘This house. It was where her house, Elin’s house is now, wasn’t it?’ He corrected himself. ‘Where Elin’s house was. Until the other night.’

Simon nodded. Anders sat with his mouth open, staring at the photographs. Then he said, ‘Let me guess. She drowned herself?’

Anna-Greta picked up the photograph of Elin looking furious and sighed. ‘This all happened before my time, but…Torgny said she threatened to drown herself if they took her cottage away from her. Then they took her cottage away from her. And then she disappeared.’

If you can imagine that all the impressions that have poured into Anders since he came back to Domarö have been collected in a kind of container, then this last drop of information was the one that made the container overflow.

The words just came flooding out of his mouth. He told them everything. From the first sense of Maja’s presence to the growing conviction that she was in the house. The bead picture slowly growing, the photographs he had had developed and the letters scratched on the kitchen table. From the first blows on the door in the middle of the night and the feeling that he was being watched to tonight’s encounter with Henrik and Björn. It all finally came pouring out.

Simon and Anna-Greta listened attentively, without any interruptions for questions. When Anders had finished, Anna-Greta pulled out a kitchen chair and climbed on it so that she could reach the top cupboard. She took out a bottle