Ukridge Stories P. G. Wodehouse (jenna bush book club txt) 📖

incline to think that it was because you knew the brooch was not there.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I, on the contrary, did⁠—the moment I received Miss Vining’s letter. I saw it all. You pawned that brooch, Stanley! I know you so well.”

I drew myself up.

“You cannot know me very well, Aunt Julia,” I said, coldly, “if you think that of me. And allow me to say, while on this subject, that your suspicions are unworthy of an aunt.”

“Never mind what they’re unworthy of. Open that drawer.”

“Break it open?”

“Break it open.”

“With a poker?”

“With anything you please. But opened it shall be, now, and in my presence.”

I gazed at her haughtily.

“Aunt Julia,” I said, “let us get this thing straight. You wish me to take a poker or some other blunt instrument and smash that bureau?”

“I do.”

“Think well.”

“I have done all the thinking necessary.”

“So be it!” I said.

So I took the poker, and I set about that bureau as probably no bureau has ever been set about since carpentry first began. And there, gleaming in the ruins, was the brooch.

“Aunt Julia,” I said, “a little trust, a little confidence, a little faith, and this might have been avoided.”

She gulped pretty freely.

“Stanley,” she said at last, “I wronged you.”

“You did.”

“I⁠—I⁠—well, I’m sorry.”

“You may well be, Aunt Julia,” I said.

And, pursuing my advantage, I ground the woman into apologetic pulp beneath what practically amounted to an iron heel. And in that condition, Corky, she still remains. How long it will last one cannot say, but for the time being I am the blue-eyed boy and I have only to give utterance to my lightest whim to have her jump six feet to fulfil it. So, when I said I wanted to ask you to dinner here tonight, she practically smiled. Let us go into the library, old horse, and trifle with the cigars. They are some special ones I had sent up from that place in Piccadilly.

Colophon

Ukridge Stories
was published between 1924 and 1926 by
P. G. Wodehouse.

This ebook was produced for
Standard Ebooks
by
B. Timothy Keith,
and is based on a transcription produced in 2020 by
An Anonymous Volunteer
for
Project Gutenberg
and on digital scans available at the
Internet Archive
and the
HathiTrust Digital Library.

The cover page is adapted from
Portrait of Paul Léautaud,
a painting completed in 1915 by
Michele Catti.
The cover and title pages feature the
League Spartan and Sorts Mill Goudy
typefaces created in 2014 and 2009 by
The League of Moveable Type.

The first edition of this ebook was released on
August 3, 2020, 7:40 p.m.
You can check for updates to this ebook, view its revision history, or download it for different ereading systems at
standardebooks.org/ebooks/p-g-wodehouse/ukridge-stories.

The volunteer-driven Standard Ebooks project relies on readers like you to submit typos, corrections, and other improvements. Anyone can contribute at standardebooks.org.

Uncopyright

May you do good and not evil.
May you find forgiveness for yourself and forgive others.
May you share freely, never taking more than you give.

Copyright pages exist to tell you can’t do something. Unlike them, this Uncopyright page exists to tell you, among other things, that the writing and artwork in this ebook are believed to be in the U.S. public domain. The U.S. public domain represents our collective cultural heritage, and items in it are free for anyone in the U.S. to do almost anything at all with, without having to get permission. Public domain items are free of copyright restrictions.

Copyright laws are different around the world. If you’re not located in the U.S., check with your local laws before using this ebook.

Non-authorship activities performed on public domain items⁠—so-called “sweat of the brow” work⁠—don’t create a new copyright. That means nobody can claim a new copyright on a public domain item for, among other things, work like digitization, markup, or typography. Regardless, to dispel any possible doubt on the copyright status of this ebook, Standard Ebooks L3C, its contributors, and the contributors to this ebook release this ebook under the terms in the CC0 1.0 Universal Public Domain Dedication, thus dedicating to the worldwide public domain all of the work they’ve done on this ebook, including but not limited to metadata, the titlepage, imprint, colophon, this Uncopyright, and any changes or enhancements to, or markup on, the original text and artwork. This dedication doesn’t change the copyright status of the underlying works, which, though believed to already be in the U.S. public domain, may not yet be in the public domain of other countries. We make this dedication in the interest of enriching our global cultural heritage, to promote free and libre culture around the world, and to give back to the unrestricted culture that has given all of us so much.