Autumn Collage by Serge Gurkski (online e book reading .TXT) 📖

watch over us.
The demon has left me for tonight.
But Zágreus will return on New Year’s Eve
And will as surely penetrate your soul
As he has once pierced mine.

You don’t even know where we are right now:
Inside these walls a princely madman once has raged
And killed a daughter of the town
And slaughtered her so cruelly that even
His father, Mad Rudolf II from Habsburg ,
The Holy Roman Emperor himself,
Henceforth completely neglected
His despicable bastard.

As candles melt in front of goblins
I sigh a bit. I light my cigarette
Then turn towards your face
And to your soul within your dream propose
Let’s fly, let’s float away…
Did you know
That your red fair hair
That close to me
Whips my mind
Into arousal
And your lips which I
Hardly dare to touch
Are of a crimson darkness that
Devours the shiver that is me?
And so we fly.
You are so soft inside
And outside and everywhere.
All of a sudden
I see red-eyed hares chasing foxes and
Roebucks hunt their hunters
And we ever so slowly
Flip and flop and
Float upside down
Over this little Bohemian town
And I press your head against my chest
Because I don’t want you to see
Madman Don Julius d’Austria
Stumble across main street
Spilling his rabid terror
Into the faces of terrified passers-by
And so we fly to the East and far we fly.
And we come down hard
Inmidst the 天山 tiān shān, the heavenly mountains
Next to the little green Buddha’s hidden grotto.
Who will heed, feed and save us
Or so say the folks.

IV /1

listen to it

Two arts

You awake from a whirlwind
Of enticing emotions
I can see that you suffer.
Let me offer you help.
You need, I think, to be taught
Two arts urgently
In order to stay alive somehow
After Dionysos has taken
Possession of you:
The first one is how to
Get over your hangover
In such a way as
To keep you craving
For his venom and
Always craving for more.
The second will then enable you
To make your mind
Hover loftily above
The hard depression
That sure would hit you
Had you stayed
With your heart
At the ground.
Take this smoke first
And then a pill
Before you down
Your breakfast glass
To hail our master
Still – as of yet
Unknowingly.
Oh, you do feel sick?
I promise not to watch.
See, you even already cackled!
Turning around now.
Sir? – Yes, the lady wants
Tea … with rum,
2 shots of it
Wait: make this
Rum, tea-flavored.
My sweet, I love it
When you smile.
You are not hungry I suppose? Ok,
I’d like to show you a photograph now.
Yes, she is, should rather say: was beautiful.
This is her story, her and mine:


IV/2

listen to it

How Petra died

You see me entering the town
On a slow train bound to the West
I’m definitely suffering from
A kind of drug-induced amnesia
But I sure know
Where I’m going to
Got his address penciled down
On cigarette paper
Plus some money and dope
And even entertain an
Admittedly queer kind of hope.
There was this friend of mine
Old-timer junkie
Quite clearly already
Very much over
All edges and me
Conquering this incredibly
Tiny city apartment.
Our friend, who never showed up
Had left us with his keys.
We did some qualified boozing,
My junking friend got us needle stuff,
But was not used to the smoke anymore,
Gave quite his very peculiar Hamlet one night
At the downstairs of a station
And earned his place
Most valiantly in
The town’s loony bin.
Holy loneliness. It was time
To fall in love:
For once Mr. Mushroom, the friend with the keys,
Had reappeared from his psychedelic woods
And on my leave he asked me
If I’d join him for a party
And it was there where
I fell in love with
His friend’s girlfriend
So deeply
I almost did not feel
The joy of liquid morphine
Rushing through
My veins anymore.
Her emerald eyes sucked me
Into the very core of her being.
We crash, unite, the world
And all its pain is gone
It is just us beyond all misery,
The bitter stench of death
And sweet decay.
But after all this carnival
We start to leave each other
Slowly, smoothly
Disappearing more and more
And there’s no way
To hold her back:
Her soul is bound to die
And mine is forced to watch.
5 years later I find you dead
You’re curled up closely
On your bed. You are so tiny,
My love, as you hug
all this messed-up linen.
I see drops of dark blood
Staring at my unbelieving eyes.
How only could you go that way?
Later your mom and me,
We’re cleaning your room
I’m wondering about
The color of those latex gloves
That I find in your dust-bin
Pink, green, yellow
Kinky stuff? But no:
It’s just forensics.
The crime scene unit
Did their job.

V

Hope

4 minutes ‘till the shops will open.
I had almost fallen asleep. Cigarette? Sure take one
Your body is so warm.
Loud Sun! Even the sun is showing up today!
Birds! There may be land in sight!
I dream of you besides me. It’s a crucial day.
Hope is always what it could be like.
Will we ever set sails to cross this dismal drunken sea
Against those waves of joy and horror?
And both of us, we watch that glass of booze,
That’s still half full, we will not die right now.
It’s either risky life or some kind of comfortable death.
We’re circulating round our headaches
But know of ways to fix this.
Your eyes glitter warmly at my crotch
But that’s long-past luxury
Only blood and heroin will flow
Through our wounds once bodies.
After the fix I lose myself
In your weak bleak arms
And we stare for hours
Into our long-lost future:
And we stare into death
Suddenly after 5000 light years
You bend your face to me:
Wait!
And I applaud you trying
to make it to the bathroom
Only a couple o’ hours later
You reappear somewhat fresher
Citrus in the air
You snuggle up at
The curious skeleton
That used to be me.
You want grass. You talk:
Baby………………
We’re not gonna make it over the weekend
And long before I catch the meaning of your song
I am into purple dreams again; Birds twittering
Love into my ears.
So we have just 4 grams for 2 fucking nights left now, you fucking asshole!
I show her the “reserve”… the beyond– h- stuff
Fist-big eyes of hers:
Great Church Choir plus Organ
Relieve Toccata
All in her eyes.
And we smoke gruntingly
Like Vietnamese water buffaloes
There is no escape


Acrossin'


I. Viva Mexico!

Sue and me
Twist in the lil Ti-juá-na joint.
Perfoming our laid-back moves
To Poncho’s Watermelon man…
With Sue’s boobs pointers to
My heaven.

Enjoying myself
But keeping an eye on the palish newcomers
Crossing the borda nightly
Joining our party in saddle-bagged shirts
Elvira, the happy whore, likes
Texan sweat to lick off hairy breasts…

As for Sue and me: We move
On…

Wai…, wai…, wait a minute babe!
So you … let your gun
Eat his forehead?

Girl, girl!
Starry night, Sue holds out in her cherry-red convertible
While I kiss the bending sky and
Sue’s just her usual, sexy self
In her burgundy velvet dress

And I bite her ear and her nipple and you know.

You know not what else
Wanna, I ask, make it down to Guatemala tonight?
She nods her red-haired head: Aye; sir!
I open the Tequila bottle,
You mean like a 1000 Miles?
Hand over the poison, she yells,
And yippie-I-yays into the dark.

II. Brazilian R’s

Somewhen later we cross the Venezuelan border
Hitting right for the coast.

Snow-white Columbia was nice to us and no troopers around.
So we’re finally on the beach, sable blanca, we fuck hard
afterwards stretching out to the murmuring ocean.

Meat tomorrow! – meet Tamara?
Uh- huh! You make, making me bite and suck
Your lips.

Shrill you: you get the fuck outta me!

And into tomorrow’s noon
Swinging out in the trocháic breeze
Future-wards my dreams
As I am teaching you
The impossibility of
Brazilian R’s,

Just a hissing, me says,
Almost like before you cum.

É pau, é pedra…

É um pouco sozinho

III. Deeper sheeper plus some psalm 23

Let’s, I let my mouth reach out for your
Orejos, get rational for a sec, ya? Si!

So you’re that little man supposed to help the gringo outta el norte de su país[?]

Manuel (which you’ll do)
Cause I,
majéstico MI,
will
Transport you to Jeffersons
Mia patria liberata,
(mi paìs libro?)
Los Estados somewhat Unidos
And you can even
keep
Your Spanish there.

My home-cunt
Re
Alizs, please, thatcha
so lucky to meet me in a state
Off border lines.

Course you, mi asinho, don’t get me but
I buy you the drinks and

I will, no: And I wished I’d be
Neruda’s Caballero solo,
Gentleman alone, gently fucking
This swell senorita serving us our
Drinks.
Pray, the Senorita’s my shepherdess
Sheepherding my hardness
Mi Rigor!
She .. leads horny me,
Thrice-hornèd me,
Sigh!,
Around her moist pastures.

She’s hot in my ear,
With her lipsticked
Kissing my neck and
Her fingers in my jeans.

Pray, pray! As I cum to
Murmured Espanol:

Oooh Baby!
Nada mi faltará

Mi COPA ESTÁ REBOSANDO

Soo-Zee I yell

Y la senorita dice como así:

Mi nombre es
Maria Lara Estobál

I have to sit down now
Grabbing a cooled bottle of Chilean
Sauvignon.

And the wet brown of your eyes says:
mi coño está muy mojado

(H)ey man!?

Amen!

IV. X4 or